Confessions of a Famous Teenage Actress

June 20, 2009

“You're going to be fine”, Joe cooed, rubbing my shoulders. “You look fine, by the way”, he joked.

I stared at my outfit in the huge mirror in Joe's dressing room as we waited in between songs after Jordin Sparks went on. I was nervous, but at the same time, I wanted this night to be over with. I was asked to stay an extra day since they changed the date to perform the song. I'd been miserable since that meant another day away from Skandar and filming which was a huge bummer. Plus, Nick, Miley, and I had avoided each other the entire 24 hours previously which was a surprise to me, a slight surprise.

“Thanks”, I said, rolling my eyes.

“We've got, like, 2 minutes. We'd better head out there”, Joe said, pulling on his jacket.

I nodded in agreement, pulling my dress down, feeling even more anxious than before. No one knew that I was there, at least, the fans didn't, anyway. I laced arms with Joe and we headed out to the stage.

…

I tapped my foot about two minutes later, seeing the delay. No one had tried to come and get us, which made me feel uneasy again.

“Where the hell is everyone?” Joe asked, looking around the deserted hallway which led to the stage.

“I don't know”, I answered.

“Let me check something out. Wait here”, he said, walking towards the stage, leaving me behind.

I shrugged, a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.

One minute turned into two, so I followed Joe's footsteps, almost stopping them when I heard the music start, hearing Miley's voice echo throughout the stadium. What the fuck?!

I ran until I found Mr. Jonas and immediately confronted him.

“Sir, why is Miley on stage?” I asked. The crowd cheered in the minute that passed, as I heard Miley's voice singing.

”Oooooh!”

“Sam, Nick didn't want you performing the song”, he said in a sad tone. Shock overcame me for a minute before I responded.

“B-but that was our song. How could he-?” I began. “Please hand me a mic”, I begged.

Mr. Jonas nodded sadly, handing me a mic as ran towards the stage, singing with Miley's part, the crowd cheering even louder than before.

I opened my mouth, singing as I stared at Nick and Miley.

”I never thought it'd come this far,
just thinking back to where we started
and how we lost all that we are.”

Nick stared from me to Miley and back, standing in between us before he started singing his line.

”We were young and times were easy,
but I could see it's not the same.
I'm standing here, but you don't see me,
I'd give it all for that to change.

And I don't want to lose heeer!
Don't wanna let her go!”

I took my part, as Miley sung with me.

”Standing out in the rain,
I need to know if it's over,
'cause I will leave you alone!”

Nick looked pained as he strummed the guitar, looking at the crowd trying to keep his expression to a slight happiness, forced obviously.

Flooded with all this pain,
knowing I'll never hold her

The three of us sung in unison.

Like I did before the stooorm.

Nick added a “yeaaaaah!” as I added a “before the storm”, staring at Miley.

One the huge screen behind us, pictures of Nick and I flashed on the screen, causing the crowd to squeal and cheer slightly. They were happy pictures which tore my heart to bits. Nick took over next.

With every strike of lightning

Comes a memory that lasts I sung.

And not a word is left uuunspoken
as the thunder starts to crash Nick and I sung in unison, Miley adding her nasally voice when we said crash.

I sung, tears filling my eyes.

Maybe I should give uuuup! I turned, getting ready to leave the stage as Miley and Nick sung the chorus, sniffing as a part of me wanted to break right then and there.

Standing out in the rain,
need to know if it's over,
'cause I will leave you alone.

Flooded with all this pain,
knowing I'll never hold her
like I did before the storm

But something stopped me and I sung with everything in me, turning to face them, and the audience.

I'm trying to keeeep
the light from going ooouuuut!
And the clouds from ripping out my broken heart!

We always said the heart is not whole,
without the one who gets you through the stoooorrm

The sprinklers turned on as water hit everyone near or on the stage as the music decreased in intensity as we sung the chorus, Miley not as loud as before. Nick and I stared at one another, exchanging glances as though we were the only ones who existed. I, however, held my arms out, as though telling him that I was the one still in the storm, the same storm that was right next to him.

Standing out in the rain,
knowing that it's really over.
Please don't leave me alone Nick and I sung just as the intensity of the song increased again.

I'm flooded with all this pain!
Knowing I'll never hold yoou
like I did before the storm! Nick had stopped singing as I continued the storm part, getting an applause, squealing, and some screams from the crowd as the song came to an end.

Like I did befooooore the storm We sung, the sprinklers ending as the tears went down my face. I wanted to drop the mic and run off stage, but I stood there, smiling, blowing kisses to the crowd as I let the tears fall.

I was hurt, more hurt than any other time I thought I'd experienced pain worse than this, but it hurt ten times more than what I felt after Nick and I broke up.

“Samantha Parker, everybody!” Kevin and Joe said, running up on stage to hug me.

“You were fantastic. Don't worry about Nick”, Joe whispered in my ear as he hugged me.

I nodded slightly, pulling the mic to my lips as I spoke into it, the crowd going wild.

“Thank you, Dallas!” I exclaimed with fake enthusiasm.

The crowd cheered louder than ever and I smiled as another tear escaped my eyes, Joe, Kevin, Nick, Miley, and I walking off the stage.

I handed Mr. Jonas the mic, wiping my tears as I headed towards the stadium to exit it when I heard Nick's voice.

“Sam! Sam! Sam, wait up!” he called, Miley at his heels.

I tried speeding up my pace, but I couldn't. I was so emotionally exhausted that I couldn't do anything I wanted anymore.

“Why should I wait, Nick? I was just humiliated in front of all of those people”, I choked as I continued my pace, not looking at him or Miley.

“I'm sorry, Sam! Really, I am”, he tried, running faster.

“Just leave me alone, Nick. You've done enough damage to me, OK?” I asked, turning to face him as the tears escaped my eyes.

“Ugh, fuck”, I grumbled, wiping them away. Nick stopped in his tracks as he stared at me.

“What? Surprised to see me cry?” I asked, biting my lip to keep myself from breaking down.

“Samantha, I'm-”, he began, but I cut across him.

“Just stop, OK?! You got what you wanted, didn't you?! You hurt me again, Nick and this time, it was enough damage to ruin my reputation and all because of her”, I stressed, looking at Miley who touched Nick's arm.

He looked just as upset as I did, but I knew he was fighting back those tears. Miley grinned behind him as the three of us stood in between this vast hallway. I swallowed my tears as I a smile appeared on my lips. A song came to me.

I licked my lips as another tear slid down my face as I began to sing, this time to Nick and Nick alone.

Of all the things I've believed in,
I just want to get it over with
Tears from behind my eyes
but I do not cry.
Counting the days that pass me by.

I've been searching deep down in my soul
the words that I've been hearing are starting to get old
It feels like I'm starting all over again.
The last three years were just pretend
and I said

Goodbye to you.
Goodbye to everything that I kneeew
You were the one I loooved,
the one thing that I tried to hold ontoooo
the one thing that I tried to hold onto

I stared at Nick as he looked away, remembering my words, the words I'd just sung to him which I sung last year, the day after I found out that he cheated on me, after I broke up with him. I heaved a quiet sigh, staring at Miley now who looked shocked at me.

“This was never a competition, Miley. You were always his from the start”, I concluded, turning away from them as I walked towards the doors.

“You're wrong, Sam. You're the one he always talked about, the one he was always fascinated and interested in. Even to this day, right now, he could never truly be mine... not unless I make you disappear”, she said sinisterly.

I stopped in my tracks, catching my breath as I heard a click of a gun.

“M-Miley, what are you doing?” Nick asked, moving in front of my back.

I turned to face his back as I saw a smile on Miley's lips as tears filled her blue eyes.

“It was always her!” she choked, another tear sliding down her face. “She's cute, Miley. What do you think? I actually got to talk to Samantha, who prefers to be called Sam. No, Miley, we shouldn't do this because I'm with Sam! Sam has a beautiful voice. I love Sam's songs. It was never me! I was always second best! But in order for you to be mine, I have to kill her”, she got out, clicking the gun.

“Nick”, I whimpered.

“You can't hurt her, Miley! Please, this isn't the way!” Nick exclaimed as he continued to shield me.

“It's the only way, Nick. I'm sorry”, she said in a low tone.

A conversation flashed back in my mind, one I had with Nick last year when we were together.

”I love you, Samantha and nothing could change that”, Nick said as he held me in his arms.

We'd gotten into an argument about him and Miley as I saw a lot of “Niley” fans everywhere from the internet to YouTube channels. Ugh.

“Y-you love me?” I asked, the sunlight shining brighter onto Nick's face.

“Yeah. I do. I would die for you, Sam”, he replied, staring into my eyes with such seriousness that... it scared me.

“I love you, too, Nick. I just wouldn't want you to do that for me”, I admitted.

“Why not?” he asked, wrinkling his brows in confusion.

“Because”, I began with a smile..
…

That night, a gunshot sounded. Joe was in tears as he stood horrified at the many police officers, security guards and paramedics that flooded the hallway.

He got through the numerous amount of them until he arrived to the spot where he saw Nick, whom was also in tears, a pool of blood, but no Sam or Miley, whom had been placed into police custody.

“Wh-where's Sam?” he asked, anger filling him as he jacked Nick up, noticing the blood on his shirt.

“Sh-she's-”, Nick stammered as tears continued to flow down his brother's broken face.

“She's WHERE, Nick?! TELL ME!” he bellowed.

“She took the bullet, Joe. She saved me”, Nick got out as he remembered the conversation he and Sam shared the previous year, just around the same month as well, when he first told her he loved her.

”Because, what?” he asked, staring into Samantha's animated eyes.

“Because I'd rather take it instead. I'd want you to live even if the bullet was meant for you”, she replied.

Nick remembered how she smiled that day, how simple that day was compared to now.

Joe unhanded him, dropping to the floor as he, himself broke down in tears.