Faded
The Outside World
Somehow I make it to school in the morning, in sweatpants and a T-shirt, but I make it,
And in Wellness class, we calculate our BMI's.
--and we have to share them with our classmates
--and my palms start to sweat
--and my hair stands on end.
I've hardly lost weight!
I calculate, and get 17. I'm so embarrassed. The kid next to me looks surprised when I whisper my BMI to him, and I almost start to cry. How could our teacher do this to us?
Obviously they don't understand the delicate imbalances of a teenage girl's emotions. And in Geometry, I sit there quietly. And I don't remember any of it. And I don't remember lunch, and I don't remember Spanish 2, and I don't remember band. Usually I at least pay attention in band. Flute is my favorite instrument to play.
And my brother takes me home after school, and I go into my room. And I sleep.
--and I dream
I haven't dreamt in a long time. But, finally, I sink into full sleep with no dreams and no way to know what is going on in the outside world.
And in Wellness class, we calculate our BMI's.
--and we have to share them with our classmates
--and my palms start to sweat
--and my hair stands on end.
I've hardly lost weight!
I calculate, and get 17. I'm so embarrassed. The kid next to me looks surprised when I whisper my BMI to him, and I almost start to cry. How could our teacher do this to us?
Obviously they don't understand the delicate imbalances of a teenage girl's emotions. And in Geometry, I sit there quietly. And I don't remember any of it. And I don't remember lunch, and I don't remember Spanish 2, and I don't remember band. Usually I at least pay attention in band. Flute is my favorite instrument to play.
And my brother takes me home after school, and I go into my room. And I sleep.
--and I dream
I haven't dreamt in a long time. But, finally, I sink into full sleep with no dreams and no way to know what is going on in the outside world.