Walking Away Is Our Biggest Mistake

I stared in disbelief at the one man id ever loved. after all this time he just shows up.

“you think that you can just ignore all of my calls and texts and then just waltz back in here with your “rockstar charm” and everything will be ok?!?!? think again Beckett. im done. you can BURN IN HELL!” i screamed at him, letting out all of my frustration from the months i spent sitting here alone.

“Fine. im gone. forever.” he just said back before walking out of my room in the house i shared with my best friend, Sisky business. Once the door was closed i collapsed and cried for hours while Sisky tried to get into my room to see if i was ok. obviously i wasnt. i finally convinced him to leave me alone and that i’d be fine in the morning.

its been a week since then. ive done nothing but eat, sleep, and cry since then. i never imagined how hard it would be to live without William...it kills me everyday. I can barely force myself out of bed because the pain actually makes it hard to do anything. He’s still here, in the house. he stays with us when hes in town.
I force myself to get up, i need something to drink. as soon as i walk into the kitchen Sisky stops talking and Will turns around to see why, as soon as my bloodshot eyes meet his i turn away and grab a drink out of the fridge before rushing upstairs before they can say anything to me.
The next morning i wake up to find a note on the table next to my bed :

I know that you probably dont care but i’ve decided to stay at the hotel
across town, you know the one we all used to chill at when we were younger?
anyways, i figure it’ll make things easier on Sisky. so he doesnt have to be split
between us.
I know you dont believe me, but i DO want to talk to you.
~Will Beckett~

I just sighed and then cried a little bit more. who was he fooling? he actually WANTS to talk to ME? as if that would ever happen. he made it pretty clear that its over. for good. as in, never speaking again.
Despite the sanity in me fighting against it, i got up and prepared myself to go down to the hotel, and heyy, if i DID end up chickening out, i always have friends that work there, i can use that as an excuse cant i?

30 minutes later i find myself standing outside his room attempting to get the courage to knock on the door. My friend at the counter just HAD to be nice and give me the room number......for once cant my friends just deny that information like they’re supposed to?!?!?

Just as i walk forward to knock on the door it opens and Will starts to walk out. Him and I both freeze and stare at each other for a few seconds.

“Lex?” he whispered almost inaudibly as if he wasnt sure if I was really standing there in front of him.

“I...uhh....I....i just....nevermind....y-you wont care anyways.....” I stuttered out after much effort, tripping over words like i used to when i was younger. Then i turned to walk away as a single tear slips down my cheek. Suddenly he grabbed my arm and spun me around before kissing me.

“I ALWAYS care. and I love you. no matter what” He whispered into my ear while giving me a bone crushing hug like he used to do, before they left on tour.

“I love you too.” I manage to choke out through my tears.

This time, no matter what, Im not gonna walk away.

and he wont let me.