Killing Loneliness

The guys had never been in first class and were amazed as the flight attendent handed us each a glass of champagne.
“Thank you MTV!” Jack raised his glass and cheersed from across the aisle. We did the same. MTV had booked us all first class tickets there and back. Also for a hotel and ride from and two the airport, but Bam told them he had that figured out. I guess we were going to be staying with Bam for the night – great. Whatever, I shook it out of my head and drank champagne.
A few hours later, we landed just outside of WestChester. The guys were stoked, they had never been to any other part of the US other then California with me. I told them about how great it was down here and they seemed to like the idea of it. I walked out front of the airport to see Dunn leaning against the hummer. I couldn't control the smile that spread acorss my face as I dropped my bag and jumped up to give him a hug.
“Hey Ash! Damn you get better looking each time I see you!” He hugged me back tightly and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. I returned it and then turned to introduce the guys.
“Ryan, this is Jack, David, Joe and Steve. They are my band members,” I smiled and pointed them each out. Then I turned and pointed at Dunn. “Guys this is Ryan, but just call him Dunn it works out better that way,” I laughed and picked up my suit case again. It was much much since we were only staying for the night but it was stil heavy.
Dunn opned the trunk and started to help us with our stuff. Each one of the guys only had a backpack which was packed, but I had my purse and a carry on suitcase. A girls gotta look good on tv anyways.
The whole way to Bam's palce, Dunn was telling me about how crazy it had been at the castle the last couple of days while everyone was getting things ready for the show. He told me random stories from recently. He asked how the band was doing and I told him about the band was doing a US and Canada tour next month. Dunn seemed excited about it and told me how he was going to make sure he came and saw us. Finally, when we pulled up to Bams place, I could see why Dunn was happy to get us from the airport. There were people running around everywhere and doing things like mad people.
We walked into Castle Bam and the guys were looking around. I told them to ignore it and follow me. I lead them upstairs where the guest rooms were. Dunn said we were staying up there. Joe and Jack in one and then Steve, David and I in the other, which I was totally fine with. I threw my suit case on the bed as soon as we got there and started to go threw the clothes that I had brought. It was warm here and I wanted somehting that was going to be perfect on stage, just as much as off stage. I took a break and walked downstairs to get a beer, and thats where I finally ran into him.
“Hey Ashleigh! Why didn't you tell me you were here?” Bam wrapped his arms around me, and for a second it felt like before but I knew it wouldn't last. I pulled way first and looked up at him.
“Well I couldn't find you, I figured you were doing something in this chaos,” I cracked my beer open and threw the lid int he trash. Bam's eyes were on me the whole time.
“It feels so good for you to be back in this house,” Bam took another step towards me and whispered his words. I wanted to believe them, just as much as I wanted to believe in Santa. But it was all a lie.
“Yah it's good to be back here,” I nodded and looked around the room. “Where's your lap dog?” I took a sip of my beer and waited for Bam to answer. His face changed and then he realized who I was talking about.
“Oh she's out shopping, she wanted somethign wear for tonight,” He nodded. We stood there in silence for a moement and thne I looked at the clock. It was 4 and I was going to be on stage at 7 and people were getting here at 6.
“Well I probably should get the guyst ogether, and do sound check. I'll see ya later,” I waved behind me as I ran up the stairs to our rooms. It was my sanctuary this trip. The guys agreed it was time for soundcheck and we headed downstairs.

Sound check went by fast, much faster then it should have and we were rushed in side to get ready. I could feel the littlbit of nervousness starting to set in. I always got a little nervous before going on stage. From inside the house, I could hear one of the first bands playing. Bam, being the great person he was made sure that we were the main attraction. The head liner. I could see in the eyes of the guys as we made our way downstairs threw the crowds of people, that they were starting to get nervous. I had never been on TV, and neither had them. We were going to be on in 20. I was kinda hoping that Bam would atleast wish me luck, but he seemed to be off doing something else. Or I guess I should say someone else.
We stood at the edge of the stage and watched as the band before us ended and walked off stage. There were lights and cameras everywhere. I looked at the guys, they had their guitars around their necks or their drum sticks in their hands.
“This is going to be great. We can do this,” I put my hand in the middle of us and they quickly pilled their hands on top of mine. When we broke apart it was time for us to go onstage. MTV had requested that we perform a full set which was a daunting task. On the plane, we had made a list of songs: Nothing Left To Lose, Bet You Wish You Had Me Back, Lithium, Beautiful, Speechless, Burn, Feast Your Eyes, Shadows Kiss and Restless.

The lights dimmed on the stage and we walked out quickly. I stopped short infront of the mic and looked at the faceless people. I picked up the mic from it's stand and the lights flashed on. Music kicked into gear and I started to dance across stage to the music. I sang loudly to the music, hitting every note, executing every line perfectly. This was by far going to be our best performance. When Nothing left to lose came on I searhced the crowd for Bam. He stood with the guys, Missy no where to be seen. I wrote this song months ago and it was about Bam. I locked my eyes with him as I sang the song and acted out the words.
The fans were going crazy, screaming like nothing else. With each song I danced and swayed to the music perfecting. Out last song, Bet you wish you had me back statred to play and I locked my eyes with Bam's again. I danced and swayed perfectly to the dirty words that I had written into the song. I watched as Bam's jaw dropped as he watched me dance. Once our last song finished I thanked the crowd, told them who were were and walked off the stage.
The first to reach me was Dunn whoses eyes were wide when he finally met mine.
“You did so fucking amazing out there!” He hugged me tightly and I gasped for breath as he let go of me.
“Thanks,” I couldn't help but have a huge smile on my face. Dunn looked around quickly and then took a step closer to me.
“Bam was so shocked. He's gone to the hosue. He's upset. He wants to be with you so bad, but is with Missy,” Dunn whispered into my ear and his words sent chils down my spine. A wicked smile started to spred on my cheek. I kissed Dunn hard on the cheek and smiled at him,
“Thats great! Let him feel like shit!” I threw up my glass and waited for everyone else to join me for a cheers. I chugged back my drink, and threw it to the ground. Tonight, no one was going to ruin my party.