Let Love In

Love is something you just can’t deny and that’s what I’ve learned. When you’re in love, you’re in love. It’s hard to fall out of it when you know the feelings are strong. Instead of battling these feelings, for once I was going to accept it and surrender. I was in love with Cameron. He made life worth living for, changed my entire life, gave back its meaning and taught me how to step out of my comfort zone. He showed me the world I was too afraid to see, showed me the feeling of love that I thought wasn’t real. He gave me everything every girl could possibly want and so much more.

And then, I thought about him. I thought about how he was feeling at this very moment and how I had broken a man’s heart all because I was too afraid. Too afraid to take chances, too afraid to jump off the edge, too afraid to let the one person who made me feel special and open up my heart.

Guilt ran through my body, making me feel a bit queasy. With every step I took towards the hotel, I became unsure about confessing everything. Was I ready to even express my feelings? Did he still love me? Will I regret this? My thoughts caused me to have a headache, making me stop for a moment as I closed my eyes. His face appeared in my mind, the background dark but his smile lit everything up. In an instant, his smile disappeared and returned to that same face he gave me at the radio station and the same face he gave me when I left him in the cold.

Opening my eyes, I stared at our hotel room door, debating on whether or not to talk to him. I paced back and forth, trying to plan out the possible outcomes. After mumbling to myself numerous times and receiving odd and concerned looks from guests, it finally hit me. Maybe I was going to regret this, but I knew that if he did love me, he’d return. So, I entered Zach and Michael’s hotel room instead.



“Are you sure you want to do this?” Nathan asked, frowning.

Michael, Nathan, Zach and I sat in a circle as I discussed my plan. Of course, the guys started freaking out and tried to convince me otherwise, but after explaining the plan, they understood even if they initially protested.

I nodded my head for the fifth time. “I’m sure. I just want to see if what he’s saying is true and real and not something bogus.”

We sat in silence for a while, saddened with how things had to end. As a way of breaking it, we all hugged endlessly, embracing the time left. Eventually, we did let go but only because I had to make one last phone call.

I dialled the number I called numerous times in order to keep them happy. It only took to rings before the person finally picked up. “Hello?” The familiar voice said to me.

“Hi, mom. I just wanted to tell you that I’ll be coming home tomorrow tonight.”


I stared out the window, watching planes take off and land as I waited for my own plane to take me home. Saying bye to the guys was unbearable, even if their tour wasn’t terribly long. Cameron had not known about my disappearance, but I knew that by the time the plane took off, he’d soon find out.

As it took off, I thought of the possible outcomes that would occur. My first thought was of Cameron chasing after me, appearing at my door and questioning my abrupt disappearance. My second thought was of him forgetting me, letting go of what he felt and continuing on without me. We’d continue to slowly build our friendship, knowing that it would never be the same. I became frightened, frightened that he wasn’t going to chase after me and that things would never be the same and that we’d both move on. But in the back of my mind, I knew that only time could tell what would happen.

My mind wandered off, remembering the letter I left on his bed before leaving. My handwriting was somewhat sloppy, considering I had to rush in order to catch my flight, but showed that I poured my heart out.

Dear Cameron,

I’m sorry for leaving things off like this. I truly apologize for hurting the most delicate part of you. You were right all along: I was afraid. I knew you would never hurt me, but my past had created so much damage that I couldn’t give love a try. The truth is, I do love you. With all my heart and every part of me. I’m sorry for denying it for the longest time, but I couldn’t bring myself to believe it until now.

By the time you finish reading this, I’ll be up in the sky flying home. As much as I wanted to stay, I knew that this was the only way of finding out if this love is true. You can go ahead and chase after me or you could let go and move on. It is your choice. You should know that I love you and appreciate every little thing you’ve done for me. I love you, Cameron.

Emma Love



When I stepped out and saw my parents, I could clearly see their facial expressions. My dad’s was full of confusion as to why I would leave the tour, but happy to have me back and well, my mom just had her arms folded across her chest, her lips forming a straight line.

“It’s good to see you!” My dad wrapped his arms around my shoulders, giving me a comforting hug. “Your mom and I missed you lot.” Mom. Psh, she only missed me because she didn’t have anyone to criticize.

When my dad and I let go, I could see that my mom’s expression didn’t change one bit. “So, why did you leave early? Did those boys already get on your last nerves?” It was evident that my mom didn’t exactly love the guys. I mean, she didn’t hate them, in a way she did like them but she found them as a distraction for me.

“No,” I said sternly, finally being able to stand up for myself. “I actually wanted to stay for the entire tour, but the guys insisted that I return home to focus on university.” My mom’s expression changed, completely surprised by what I said. Even if it was a lie, I was glad to see that she wasn’t giving me that look she always gave me.

When I got home, I was happy to be in my room again. Nothing had changed; everything was in its place. I dropped my bags and stepped into my balcony, admiring the familiar San Diego atmosphere. It was close to midnight and the night was still. I could faintly hear the waves crashing that were only a few minutes away and the quiet hustle and bustle of cars of teenagers either sneaking out or sneaking back into their homes.

I looked up at the sky, wondering if he was on his way or if he was back in the hotel room, staring blankly at the ceiling while trying to convince himself to move on. As I walked back into my room, I wondered about what would happen the next day. All I had to do was wait and find out.



When I woke up the next morning, I was slightly frightened as to why I didn’t hear any laughter coming from the guys or hear the TV booming through the entire bus. When I realized I wasn’t in my bunk on the tour bus, I remembered that I was home and not on tour.

The day reminded me of the past, how it started out dull and ended off dull. And that’s how the day was. I stayed home all day, wondering if maybe he’d appear any second, but every time I looked out the window, he wasn’t there.

I sat on my bed, trying to finish reading the book I started when the tour began. I looked out at my balcony, watching the gray skies roll, signalling that a storm was brewing. The dark skies was followed by a slight boom, letting San Diego know that it wasn’t just rain, but it was going to pour and there was going to be thunder and lightning.

The sound of Maroon 5 filled my room, reminding me of Cameron and I singing their songs. I looked at the pile of CD’s he lent me and heard She Will Be Loved begin to play.



I glanced at my clock, losing hope as time passed me by. I was ready to give up and let go the way I thought he did. I put my book away and got off my bed, ready to make dinner for myself since my parents left to see their friends. And then, I heard a sound, a sound I longed of hearing today, but doubted would happen. Closely following the sound was the patter of the rain hitting against my window and balcony. The noise started again, this time a bit a louder, draining out the sound of the rain. I turned around, seeing him appear at the door of my balcony. He stood there, waiting as the rain began to pour. Cameron came after all.



He pressed his hand against the glass of my balcony door, waiting for me to finally let him in. He was waiting for me, waiting for this day to finally arrive. He gave me a smile, despite the rain that was drenching him. He didn’t care about the weather or anything else for that matter. All he wanted was for me to open the door.



I pressed my hand against the door, placing it exactly where his hand was. Even though this thin sheet of glass blocked us, I could feel the sparks igniting and flash inside our bodies. I placed my hand on the handle, taking my time opening it and anticipating every second. Once the door flung open, he grabbed my hand pulling me outside in the rain and pressing his lips against mine. It wasn’t like the past kisses we shared, but something much more meaningful. It wasn’t just a kiss, but a kiss that was worth waiting for, worth all the pain and suffering. I didn’t care if it was raining and we were both getting drenched. All that mattered was that we were together, face to face and that all we needed was each other. We came up for air, our chests rising and falling. He held me close as I buried my face in his chest. I could hear his heart beat in time with the rain. At that very moment, I could feel my last wall fall and crumble to the ground, knowing that I was in the arms of the one who changed my life.



His nose was pressed against me by my ear as he whispered those three words: those three words that I’ve grown to known to be dreadful, but with him, those were the words that made life worth living for. Those were the words that I only wanted to hear him say to me and I knew that I would only be the one to hear him say it. And at last, I finally let the love enter my heart and those words enter in as well. Love does exist after all.