Sequel: Sweet Child O' Mine ›
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Help Me, Save Me
It's 4 In The Morning, You Got One More Chance To Die
ZACKY’S POV
ABOUT TWO MONTHS LATER [December 27, 2009]
10 AM
I snuck up behind my sweetheart and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. She seemed to tense up as I wrapped my arms around her huge stomach. I put my chin on her shoulder and stared down at her stomach. It was about twice the size of what it was nine months ago. Any day now, she was going to pop.
“Ready to go to the recording studio tonight?” I asked her, turning my head so I could meet her sweet blue eyes. She gave slight nod before she pressed her lips into mine. The sun from outside the window glistened against her black hair. In that moment, I thought about all what happened to me this past year. I broke up with girlfriend of three years, went through a slight depression, met an amazing girl, went on tour, got Casey pregnant, and then I got an amazing “niece”….now it was all going to end with Casey having a daughter with our own. Wow, what a year.
I pulled away from her lips, smiling. I honestly couldn’t be happier with my life. My band was recording our next album already, and it was beginning to sound great. Tonight, I’m supposed to lay down some guitar tracks for some songs we’re working on. Casey was dying to see me record some shit, so I decided that tonight would be the perfect night to do that.
I stepped away from Casey and let her finish making herself lunch. I walked back into my living room and plopped myself onto my couch. I grabbed the remote and began flipping through the channels. Boring. Boring. Boring. Boring…Fuck it.
I turned off the TV and I took my cadet hat over my face. I was tired as fuck from all this baby shit. Yesterday I just finished painting Zackie’s room. And truly, I was jealous that this kid was getting such a fucking cool room. Her room walls were pitch black with a few of my old guitars hanging from the walls. And painted on one of the walls was a hot pink cartoon deathbat. The deathbat wasn’t scary at all and it was actually really cute. I was extremely grateful that Cameron was able to do that for me. It was sure as hell better than any other unicorn or shit that could have been painted on her wall.
I felt that I deserve a nap. Hell, who the fuck is going to stop me? I closed my eyes and allowed darkness to take me in.
6 PM
AMBER’S POV
Brian’s lips crashed against mine again for like the fiftieth time today. It was just like the Halloween party, except we were in the back lot of the recording studio and not in a kitchen. Brian’s hands up against the wall, pinning me to it. My arms were tightly wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer to me. Ah, how I love the feel of his lips. How I love the rush of the moment. How I love the feel of the steal. Michelle wanted to stay at their home tonight, so Brian took me to the recording studio with him. We didn’t need to worry about her catching us.
Brian moved his lips from my lips to my neck. He was just getting into it when I heard the squeak of the back door and familiar voice yell, “What the fuck?” Brian pushed away from me and we both stared at Matt, who stared at us in shock.
“Syn, you’re cheating on your wife with Amber?” Matt asked his eyes wide. I stood there, my mouth wide open trying to think of some excuse. I felt the guilt crash over me like a strong wave. Me, standing there brought back memories of when I found out that Andy cheated on me. The pain, the feeling of betrayal…it all came back to me. Tears welled up in my eyes.
“Okay, you caught us. But Matt, I want to be with Amber. She makes me happy. I know I’m a married man but I can’t do it anymore…So tell Michelle if you want. I don’t fucking care anymore. All I care about is Amber,” Brian told Matt, not single hit of pain in his words.
But Matt just shook his head, his face turning grim. The air around us got surprisingly cold for Huntington Beach weather. Then again it is December. Whatever. I began seeing Matt’s breaths in the air as it slowly floated up. “Bri, she trusted you. She gave her life for you. She’s done nothing wrong to hurt you. She loved you no matter what you did. Michelle is your soul mate….I’m not going to tell her. You are,” That’s all Matt said as he stepped back inside the building. Every single word Matt said shot through me like a bullet. Tears rolled down my cheek. Brian seemed to notice me and he took me in his warm arms.
“Sh Amber don’t listen to Matt. He’s only trying to scare us. Michelle isn’t going to find out about us…” Brian whispered, trying to reassure me. I buried my face in chest, trying to hide my tears. I’ve always been the good girl…but now all I am is a fucking whore.
And no words could change that fact.
11 PM
JIMMY’S POV
“Okay Zacky I promise I’ll be there at the studio tomorrow,” I told him through the phone. I could hear him chuckle. Oh yeah he’s been drinking.
“Ha okay Jimmy, talk to you later,” Zacky said a little too happily and with a slurred voice. We said our goodbye and then I got off the phone with him. I would be at the studio with them tonight, but I just had eye surgery last night and I still had a little blurred vision. But damn, did it feel good not to have to worry about glasses anymore.
I began to climb my stairs again, trying to make as little noise as possible. Leana was already sleeping and I did not want to wake her. While I climbing the stairs, I remembered that I had to take some medication, thanks to my eye surgery.
The medication was down in my kitchen cabinets. I grunted and climbed back down the stairs. I slowly made my way through the darkness that is my home. The only light that shined through was that of the moon. I chuckled a little bit in my mind. Nightmare…
I finally found my way to the kitchen. I stumbled through the dark kitchen and made my way to the fridge. I opened it and found a beer. I know you aren’t supposed to mix medication with alcohol but I needed something to knock me out quick. And I’ve already done this millions of times. I doubt one last time is going to kill me.
I made my way to the cabinet and opened. I searched through the millions of pill bottles we had in there until I found the right ones. Well, I think they’re right…
I shrugged it off and shook out a couple white pills out from each bottle. I don’t know how many pills I was taking, the doctor prescribed so much, I lost track… All the pills hurt as the slid down my throat. I took a big gulp of beer after each different pill I swallowed. I could already feel my nerves calm and my muscles relaxed. Ah, that’s better…
I finished doing my business and I slowly made my way back upstairs to my room. The side effects of medication kicked in and the dizziness overcame me. Thank God my bedroom was straight ahead. I stumbled through the dark hallway, making loud thudding footsteps as I did. I nearly fell on top of my wife as I landed in bed.
“Goodnight Jimmy,” Leana mumbled as she turned over in our bed, trying to fall back asleep. I gave her a quick kiss on the forehead and then I threw the bed covers over me. My brain and body became numb and my breathing became heavy and shallow. I knew something was really wrong, but sleep overcame me before I could even move.
4 AM {December 28, 2009}
It’s funny how you know you’re going to die. My whole body became numb, number than it’s ever been. I couldn’t feel my feet, my fingers, my face…My mind became blank and all I saw was the white light. That bright, white light that everybody talks about seeing when the die. So it’s not just a myth. I wanted to look at my beautiful wife one last time…I want to say goodbye to her, to taste her lips one last time. But I couldn’t open my eyes, I couldn’t move. I’m dying. I came to the realization, and it hit me like a bitch slap to the face. Except, it was a lot more peaceful. I see why everybody wants to go out this way…No pain. No worries. It felt actually great…I felt the warm embrace of the light take me. Then, I felt my heart stop and death finally overtake me. The deathbat finally got me.
I hope it's worth it, out on the highway, yeah
I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you
So tell everybody, the ones who walk beside me, yeah
I hope you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight
I hope it's worth it, what's left behind me, yeah
I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you
So tell everybody, the ones who walk beside me, yeah
I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight…
***
”He had an eye operation, he took his medication, then drank some beer and it ended there.”
- M. Shadows
ABOUT TWO MONTHS LATER [December 27, 2009]
10 AM
I snuck up behind my sweetheart and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. She seemed to tense up as I wrapped my arms around her huge stomach. I put my chin on her shoulder and stared down at her stomach. It was about twice the size of what it was nine months ago. Any day now, she was going to pop.
“Ready to go to the recording studio tonight?” I asked her, turning my head so I could meet her sweet blue eyes. She gave slight nod before she pressed her lips into mine. The sun from outside the window glistened against her black hair. In that moment, I thought about all what happened to me this past year. I broke up with girlfriend of three years, went through a slight depression, met an amazing girl, went on tour, got Casey pregnant, and then I got an amazing “niece”….now it was all going to end with Casey having a daughter with our own. Wow, what a year.
I pulled away from her lips, smiling. I honestly couldn’t be happier with my life. My band was recording our next album already, and it was beginning to sound great. Tonight, I’m supposed to lay down some guitar tracks for some songs we’re working on. Casey was dying to see me record some shit, so I decided that tonight would be the perfect night to do that.
I stepped away from Casey and let her finish making herself lunch. I walked back into my living room and plopped myself onto my couch. I grabbed the remote and began flipping through the channels. Boring. Boring. Boring. Boring…Fuck it.
I turned off the TV and I took my cadet hat over my face. I was tired as fuck from all this baby shit. Yesterday I just finished painting Zackie’s room. And truly, I was jealous that this kid was getting such a fucking cool room. Her room walls were pitch black with a few of my old guitars hanging from the walls. And painted on one of the walls was a hot pink cartoon deathbat. The deathbat wasn’t scary at all and it was actually really cute. I was extremely grateful that Cameron was able to do that for me. It was sure as hell better than any other unicorn or shit that could have been painted on her wall.
I felt that I deserve a nap. Hell, who the fuck is going to stop me? I closed my eyes and allowed darkness to take me in.
6 PM
AMBER’S POV
Brian’s lips crashed against mine again for like the fiftieth time today. It was just like the Halloween party, except we were in the back lot of the recording studio and not in a kitchen. Brian’s hands up against the wall, pinning me to it. My arms were tightly wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer to me. Ah, how I love the feel of his lips. How I love the rush of the moment. How I love the feel of the steal. Michelle wanted to stay at their home tonight, so Brian took me to the recording studio with him. We didn’t need to worry about her catching us.
Brian moved his lips from my lips to my neck. He was just getting into it when I heard the squeak of the back door and familiar voice yell, “What the fuck?” Brian pushed away from me and we both stared at Matt, who stared at us in shock.
“Syn, you’re cheating on your wife with Amber?” Matt asked his eyes wide. I stood there, my mouth wide open trying to think of some excuse. I felt the guilt crash over me like a strong wave. Me, standing there brought back memories of when I found out that Andy cheated on me. The pain, the feeling of betrayal…it all came back to me. Tears welled up in my eyes.
“Okay, you caught us. But Matt, I want to be with Amber. She makes me happy. I know I’m a married man but I can’t do it anymore…So tell Michelle if you want. I don’t fucking care anymore. All I care about is Amber,” Brian told Matt, not single hit of pain in his words.
But Matt just shook his head, his face turning grim. The air around us got surprisingly cold for Huntington Beach weather. Then again it is December. Whatever. I began seeing Matt’s breaths in the air as it slowly floated up. “Bri, she trusted you. She gave her life for you. She’s done nothing wrong to hurt you. She loved you no matter what you did. Michelle is your soul mate….I’m not going to tell her. You are,” That’s all Matt said as he stepped back inside the building. Every single word Matt said shot through me like a bullet. Tears rolled down my cheek. Brian seemed to notice me and he took me in his warm arms.
“Sh Amber don’t listen to Matt. He’s only trying to scare us. Michelle isn’t going to find out about us…” Brian whispered, trying to reassure me. I buried my face in chest, trying to hide my tears. I’ve always been the good girl…but now all I am is a fucking whore.
And no words could change that fact.
11 PM
JIMMY’S POV
“Okay Zacky I promise I’ll be there at the studio tomorrow,” I told him through the phone. I could hear him chuckle. Oh yeah he’s been drinking.
“Ha okay Jimmy, talk to you later,” Zacky said a little too happily and with a slurred voice. We said our goodbye and then I got off the phone with him. I would be at the studio with them tonight, but I just had eye surgery last night and I still had a little blurred vision. But damn, did it feel good not to have to worry about glasses anymore.
I began to climb my stairs again, trying to make as little noise as possible. Leana was already sleeping and I did not want to wake her. While I climbing the stairs, I remembered that I had to take some medication, thanks to my eye surgery.
The medication was down in my kitchen cabinets. I grunted and climbed back down the stairs. I slowly made my way through the darkness that is my home. The only light that shined through was that of the moon. I chuckled a little bit in my mind. Nightmare…
I finally found my way to the kitchen. I stumbled through the dark kitchen and made my way to the fridge. I opened it and found a beer. I know you aren’t supposed to mix medication with alcohol but I needed something to knock me out quick. And I’ve already done this millions of times. I doubt one last time is going to kill me.
I made my way to the cabinet and opened. I searched through the millions of pill bottles we had in there until I found the right ones. Well, I think they’re right…
I shrugged it off and shook out a couple white pills out from each bottle. I don’t know how many pills I was taking, the doctor prescribed so much, I lost track… All the pills hurt as the slid down my throat. I took a big gulp of beer after each different pill I swallowed. I could already feel my nerves calm and my muscles relaxed. Ah, that’s better…
I finished doing my business and I slowly made my way back upstairs to my room. The side effects of medication kicked in and the dizziness overcame me. Thank God my bedroom was straight ahead. I stumbled through the dark hallway, making loud thudding footsteps as I did. I nearly fell on top of my wife as I landed in bed.
“Goodnight Jimmy,” Leana mumbled as she turned over in our bed, trying to fall back asleep. I gave her a quick kiss on the forehead and then I threw the bed covers over me. My brain and body became numb and my breathing became heavy and shallow. I knew something was really wrong, but sleep overcame me before I could even move.
4 AM {December 28, 2009}
It’s funny how you know you’re going to die. My whole body became numb, number than it’s ever been. I couldn’t feel my feet, my fingers, my face…My mind became blank and all I saw was the white light. That bright, white light that everybody talks about seeing when the die. So it’s not just a myth. I wanted to look at my beautiful wife one last time…I want to say goodbye to her, to taste her lips one last time. But I couldn’t open my eyes, I couldn’t move. I’m dying. I came to the realization, and it hit me like a bitch slap to the face. Except, it was a lot more peaceful. I see why everybody wants to go out this way…No pain. No worries. It felt actually great…I felt the warm embrace of the light take me. Then, I felt my heart stop and death finally overtake me. The deathbat finally got me.
I hope it's worth it, out on the highway, yeah
I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you
So tell everybody, the ones who walk beside me, yeah
I hope you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight
I hope it's worth it, what's left behind me, yeah
I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you
So tell everybody, the ones who walk beside me, yeah
I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight…
***
”He had an eye operation, he took his medication, then drank some beer and it ended there.”
- M. Shadows
♠ ♠ ♠
RIP JIMMY! Yes the quote at the end of the chapter is actually a quote from M Shads himself. :( Two more chapter left! Thanks to TwistedScars for the comment!! :) Comment and Subscribe!