If You Need Me

"Kirsten, you're gonna need to slow down, you can't force me into four inch heels, then practically run down stadium stairs. I think that's kind of a common sense thing," I said, way behind my best friend Kirsten Schweinsteiger as she practically sprinted down to the front row to say hi to her older brother as he trained with his teammates of the German National team.
She completely ignored me she yelled for Bastian, one of the only players on the team that I knew fairly well. I should anyway, considering I'd been Kirsten's friend since we were in elementary school. "Bastian!" She yelled, about ready to leap over the railing separating them. I've always been extremely jealous of her relationship with her family; mine has always been less than ideal.
Upon hearing his name, Bastian turned, smiled hugely, and waved to her. To me, too, I suppose, but I knew he was infinitely more excited about Kirsten than me, I gave back a small wave, but stopped as soon as Bastian's teammates started to turn and look in our direction. One in particular caught my eye. He was tall, definitely over six feet, although it was hard to tell from so far away and from such a weird angle. He was talking animatedly with Bastian, seeming to be getting really worked up over something. Bastian, on the other hand, was remaining calm, obviously trying to make his friend relax.
"Kirsten, is his friend okay?" I asked.
"Oh, Lukas? I worry about that boy sometimes, he'll just get worked up over the silliest things. I can't always understand him. But he's really nice and sweet, and he's definitely easy on the eyes," she smiled, and elbowed me lightly in the side. She was unrelenting in her quest to find me an acceptable boyfriend. She never liked any of the guys I let her meet, which I solved easily by not letting her meet my boyfriends anymore.
The practice ended within half an hour, half an hour that was spent watching the players play possession, some shooting/defending drill, and ended with sprints. When they were done, as well as really sweaty, they started walking over towards us. At first I thought they were actually going to try to talk to us, but then I realized we were standing over the door to the tunnel that led to the locker rooms and felt really foolish.
"Kirsten, triff mich bei meinem auto in zehn minuten, gut?" Bastian told Kirsten before disappearing into the tunnel, closely followed by Lukas. (Kirsten, meet me at my car in ten minutes, okay?)
" Ja, aber beeil dich du fette speck," she smiled. (Yeah, but hurry you fattie!)
Naturally, I had no idea what they were saying to each other, so I tried to at least not make it obvious, though I knew Bastian knew I could only say 'thank you' and 'please' in German. I followed Kirsten out to Bastian's car after we took a small detour around the parking lot. Growing up in a house with only one other girl, Kirsten was definitely a car junkie. She knew more about them than a lot of guys I knew, and some of them didn't necessarily appreciate it.
I must admit, I had my eye on a Porsche out there; they've always been my weakness. Thankfully, Bastian appeared just in time to stop Kirsten from lecturing me on all the differences between the various makes and models of Ferraris. I resisted telling her that she was preaching to the choir; my Italian heritage had to have some kind of payoff, right?
"Kirsten, take it easy. You can tell the guys all about their cars tomorrow, okay?" Bastian said, coming up behind us. We spun around on our heels and I waited as Kirsten and Bastian hugged each other once more before he turned to me and gave me a hug.
"Hey, Sienna. How's it going?" Bastian asked as we put our stuff into his car. It wasn't going to be a very comfortable ride, I could tell that easily from his way too small trunk and hardly any bigger backseat. "Lukas."
I stepped around from the other side of the car so I could get a closer look at Lukas, and maybe find out why he was acting so weird earlier.
As soon as Lukas and I saw each other, he started towards me, already speaking in rapid German. Before he could get more than a couple steps, however, Bastian stepped in his way and pushed him lightly backwards. "Lukas, sie ist nicht Isabella. Nicht peinlich selbst."
"Ja sie ist! Wie kann man sie anschauen und nicht so denken?" Lukas motioned to me, barely glancing at Bastian, who was by now having a harder time holding Lukas back.
I looked at Kirsten, hoping she'd be some help in the translation, but she seemed just as surprised as I was, though at least she knew what was going on and what they were talking about. "Hey guys? You wanna speak English, maybe even throw in some Italian? I think you're forgetting I don’t' know German." I could have sworn I saw at least a small flicker of disappointment in Lukas' eyes, but it was replaced with hope the second afterwards.
"Girls, go on and get in the car. I'll just be a second, okay?" Bastian said to us.
I really wanted to find out what was up with this guy, but of course no one will ever tell me anything that I really want to know when I want to know t. So, I let myself be pulled into Bastian's Audi S8. I barely had time to buckle up, much less ask Kirsten what the hell that was all about, before Bastian joined us in the driver's seat. "Sorry about that, Sienna. He's...had a rough time lately."
I understood from his tone that it wasn't an easy story to tell, so I decided against prying. So I shrugged and replied, "No worries."

That night, as I was getting ready for bed, Bastian knocked on my door and came in after I said he could. He sat on my bed and I glanced up from my drawing pad to look at him. "Whatcha need?" I asked.
"I just feel that, with all that happened with Lukas today, you should know why he was acting like that."
Hells yeah, I wanna know! I thought, but instead of saying so, I just shrugged and said, "Yeah, kinda."
He smiled as though he knew what I was thinking, but the smile disappeared quickly. "A few years ago, Lukas met this girl Isabella, who, as you've probably figured, looked incredibly like you. It was clear to everyone that they liked each other a lot, and he asked her to be his girlfriend soon after they met. After a little over a year, he asked her to marry him, but, since they were both still so young, she said she would have to think about it. Of course, Lukas was extremely disappointed, but he still had hope. On her way home that night, she was hit by a drunk driver and died instantly. Lukas went into a bad depression for a few months, until we managed to help him out of it and try to move on. though he didn't want to. He knew it was necessary in his heart, I think. He had seemed to really be making progress until..."
Bastian didn't need to say the words. I knew what he was thinking. Until you showed up. I immediately felt awful, even though I knew I hadn't actually done anything wrong.
"Don't feel bad," he said, again reading my mind.
"I know I have no reason to, but I do. If it's making everything worse, I can leave. I'll go find somewhere else to stay so Lukas won't get worse."
"No, Sienna. Absolutely not. It's past time he got over her and moved on, and I would never let you go for a reason like that. He'll be fine. I promise," Bastian gave me a hug before slowly walking out of the room, leaving me to think about everything he'd told me in silence.
For a while I just sat and wondered what in the world I could do to help, but I was coming up with nothing. How do you help someone like that? I then realized the kinds of problems that those close to Lukas were having as well. How do therapists do this stuff? I wondered. After another ten minutes or so I realized how thirsty I was and headed downstairs, having to fumble for the light switch, since apparently everyone had gone to bed without telling me so. Almost as soon as I flipped it and the lights came on, I saw a shadow just outside the door. Oh gosh, I thought to myself. I've made it for twenty four years and all the way to Germany, and this is where I die.
I ran to the kitchen and grabbed a huge knife before slowly turning and walking back towards the door. The person knocked, which did kind of make me think they weren't going to try to kill me, so I decided to open the door a little bit. Doing so revealed just enough light for me to realize it was just Lukas, so I opened the door wider and let him in.
"Where you going to stab me with that?" He asked warily, eyeing the knife in my lowered hand.
"Um...well, I didn't know who it was, and..." I didn't know what else to say, so I let him infer my meaning.
He nodded and slowly took it from me before replacing it in its holder.
"So, do you want me to go get Bastian? I think he just went upstairs to bed, so he's probably still awake-"
"Sienna, I came here for you. Well, to apologize, really. For the way I acted earlier. It was uncalled for, and I'm sure you probably think I'm some crazy psychopath who should be locked up in an institute. But honestly, I don't know what came over me, I-"
"Lukas, it's okay. Bastian explained the story to me. I understand. I'm sure I'd be way worse."
He only nodded. "I wish he hadn't. Now I'm sure I've lost any chance I might have had with you."
I looked up to his face and took the two steps closer to him and hugged him. "No, you haven't. I can be your Isabelle if you need me to."
"No," he said, hugging me back. "She's in the past. I want you to be you, and no one else."