Inside Bruins Hockey With Micky And Marchy

RISTUCCIA ARENA
PRACTICE
JANUARY 12TH

“Seguin, you look like you’re going to die.” I said to little Tyler who looked like he only had about an hour of sleep last night and was falling asleep in his cubby. “Wake up! We have practice! Tomorrow we play the god damn Flyers and I don’t want to have my wingmate failing on me.”
“Meh…” Was all Seguin could get out.
“This isn’t good. See what happens when you don’t get enough sleep before practice? Ok, this calls for an emergency.” Walking over to my bag, I began to fish through it and pulled out a giant can of Red Bull, I then called out to Tyler.
“Hey Seguin! Catch!” Tyler looked up and caught the can of Red Bull and just stared at it.
“Really Roxanne?”
“DRINK IT!” I cried.
“YES MA’AM!” Tyler then chugged the can of Red Bull, tossing the empty can to one side of the locker room. “Damn, I can feel my inners burning from the acidity!”
“Feels like victory, doesn’t it?” I said.
“…no it doesn’t. I swear to god, if I puke at practice, it’s going to be all over you!”
“SEGUIN, YOU’RE NOT NICE!” I yelled at his retreating form, following after him in my gear and getting out on the main ice, wondering when the caffeine was going to hit Tyler.

*****

“Alright Micky, do something for the fans that you tend to do a lot at practice.” Marchand told me, camera trained on me. This time by an actual cameraman, not one of us.
“What? This?” I quickly skated into Marchand, checking him into the boards and sending him down on the ice.
“OUCH! No! Not that!” I started laughing.
“Well I do it a lot at practice, what did you expect!” Then out of nowhere, I felt myself get checked right into the boards and onto my face. Rolling over, I looked to who the perpetrator was to see Tyler smiling like a dumb idiot. “Seguin? WHAT THE HELL!”
“What? You were completely oblivious to everything, you just finished checking Marchand, it was a perfect opportunity!”
“Whoa, kid, slow down your speaking! You’re spitting out words faster than a Uzi spits bullets!” Marchand said. I gave him a raised eyebrow. “What? I was playing Modern Warfare 2 last night! Give me a break!” Rolling my eyes, I reverted my attention back to Tyler.
“Nice check though! See you’ve woken up finaly!”
“Yeah, I have, and it feels great. You know, I should probably skate off now before I start shaking from all this caffeine…”
“Yeah, that might be a goo-”
“HEY COACH!” Tyler cried, before skating off faster than I could finish my sentence.
“ood idea…” I trailed off lamely.
“Jeremy, can I have the camera? We have two-three more years before we can get that kid drunk and this might be the closest thing we get to it in that time!” Marchand said, holding his hand out to Jeremy the cameraman who passed it over.
“You would be counting down to the day we can get little Seguin drunk.” I stated, joining Marchy with the filming. “I’m sensing new Insiders video!”
“You bet it Micky! Let’s go!” Skating off with me, we caught sight of Tyler jumping on Recchi’s back like a maniac. Marchand made sure he got the shuffle on camera as everyone looked queerly at Tyler then started laughing.
“Ok, who gave the teenager caffeine!?” Recchi called out.
“I did Dad!” I cried. Yes, I call Recchi dad, you got a problem?
“Why did you do that!? You don’t give teenagers energy drinks!”
“What? It’s better than him falling asleep on the ice!” At this moment Marchand was filming me and Recchi talking while catching Tyler jumping around like an idiot on his skates in the background, trying to reach Chara’s height.
“This is going to be an entertaining practice…” Ference commented to Savard, as Tyler had an ADD moment and started going after the hockey pucks that coach just dropped on the ice. We started off practice as usual, testing scenarios, weak points, skills, the whole nine yards. The whole time, Tyler high off his mind with energy drinks. We started some shoot out scenarios on Tim Thomas and when Tyler’s turn was up, his shot was stopped by Thomas and instead of moving off he stopped and gave Thomas a pouting face.
“You stopped my goal!” Before we knew it, he tackled Thomas to the ground and I started dying of laughter.
“MARCHAND, JEREMY, WHO EVER HAS THE CAMERA I HOPE YOU GOT THAT!” Tim Thomas wrestled the energetic teen off of him and I couldn’t stand up on the ice anymore for laughing too hard at the whole thing. Then, when standing at attention while Coach talked to us about how positioning I key to the offense, I saw out of the corner of my eye Tyler chatting with Boychuk and then before I knew it, both of them began to wrestle with each other using their hockey sticks.
“BAHA! TAKE THAT!” Tyler cried.
“You still have lots of training my young padawan….” Boychuk said. Coach looked over and saw the scene that was happening and just stopped talking and looked at the ceiling.
“These days make me wonder why I haven’t retired yet…” He muttered. I snorted along with Marchand who was filming the entire thing. Practice soon ended and we all wearily headed to the locker room to freshen up. I got an arm draped over my shoulder by Boychuk who sighed.
“Thank you Roxanne for showing Tyler the wonders of energy drinks. You have made this entire teams’ day.”
“Agreed Roxy…we have new footage for the Bruins website and an insight to what it’s going to be like on Tyler’s 21st birthday!” Marchand said in excitement.
“Speaking of which…where is the kid?” Bergeron wondered, looking around. All four of us looked behind us to see dear little Tyler Seguin face first on the ice…passed out.
“Awww he had a caffeine craaaaash.” Boychuk said.
“Let’s leave him for the zamboni dude.” Bergeron said. We all looked at each other.
“Yeaaaaah.”