This Moment was Held for Me

I continued to think about my new plan until the end of my shift. To my surprise, when I checked my phone Frank had finally replied. I didn’t have time to read it all though because Gerard interrupted me.
“Mia!” he hollered, “Someone is here for you.”
My heart skipped a beat, hoping it was Frank.
It was. There he stood, hands in pocket, waiting for me at the door.
“Hey,” I said with a weak smile when I finally walked up to him. Gerard looked at us awkwardly and hurried away into the backroom of the comic store.
“I just finished work and thought I should pop in,” Frank explained casually, “You left me a lot of messages,” he added.
“I wanted to see you,” I said seriously as I looked at his face. He mostly was avoiding eye contact and his foot scuffed along the floor.
Frank ignored my comment and lowered his voice to ask me a question, “Have you spoke to your Mom yet?”
I paused before I answered him. I still hadn’t had a proper chance to sit her down and explain everything. Amanda was over and then I wanted time to myself to just think. I had only just decided my new plan of action. I bit my lip. I noticed Frank had his eyebrows raised as he studied my face.
Finally I answered him cautiously, “Not yet.”
“Fuck Mia,” he ran a stressed hand through his hair, “Then why did you ask to see me?”
“Because I’m sorry,” I said strongly, “And I miss you.” I felt tears prickle at the corner of my eyes.
“I miss you too,” Frank said as he ran a stressed hand through his hair, “But I’m sick of waiting around and feeling unimportant.”
“I’m sorry,” I repeated softly as a tear escaped my eye. I felt so terrible that I had made Frank feel that way.
“Me too,” Frank said as he took a step forward toward me and wiped my tear away. He silently cupped my face in his hands and studied my eyes. Then, he quickly turned around and exited the store without a glance behind him.

I became even more determined after I realized Frank wasn’t going to be with me unless I spoke to my Mom. After Frank left I had felt scared and sad about whether he was going to stick around for me. I’d never seen Frank so serious and quiet. I had finished my shift in silence and walked home. With each step I gathered up more courage to talk to Mom honestly. I waited nervously for her on the couch; fiddling with its seam. Finally, she walked through the door.
“Mia?” she called out, “Can you give me a hand? I’ve got groceries,” she said as she pushed her way through the front door.
I slowly got off the couch and grabbed the last few bags. I brought them into the kitchen and we unpacked them together. I remained silence as I know didn’t know when to bring up the issue of Frank. Luckily, she brought it up for me instead.
“What’s wrong with you today?” she asked me suspiciously, “You’re so quiet! Usually you ask me how my day was,” she said.
“I’ve got something on my mind,” I said breathing out, “I want to talk to you about it.”
“Can it wait Mia? I’ve had a busy day,” she said as she poked around in the cupboard.
I was determined, “No Mom, it’s really important.”
She turned around from her position to look at me, “Oh, okay. Do you want to talk about it now?”
I swallowed nervously, “I think that would be best, please.”
Mom pulled a little face but sat down with me on the couch.
I breathed out, “Mom these past few weeks I haven’t been particularly honest with you,” I began, “I’ve sort of developed big feelings for Frank,” I continued to confessed as she stared at me seriously, “And we began a relationship which I insisted we should keep secret from you.” I looked up and Mom was blinking at me in shock.
I continued, “I’m really sorry for lying to you. I want to be honest with you from now on. Frank and I aren’t seeing each other at the moment because he’s sick of our relationship being a secret…” I trailed off emotional at the thought.
Mom was shaking her head at me, “Oh my..I can’t believe you Mia! I told you to talk to me if you two became more than friends! I said I’d let you date him!”
“Date him?” I said incredulously as I thought back to our initial conversation, “You made up so many rules around me having a boyfriend! It would have been impossible to date him. You’d be monitoring my every moment with him.”
She looked at me pointedly, “I’m your Mother. It’s my right.”
I gathered my thoughts and realized that she wasn’t even defending herself.
“You said all those rules on purpose, didn’t you?” I said slowly, “To put me off dating anyone!”
“That’s not the point now, is it? You’ve been lying to me again!” she said angrily, “I’m so disappointed in you.”
“I wouldn’t have had to lie if you were just reasonable in the beginning!”
“I have to protect you Mia. I made a good decision!” she defended herself with a voice like a hiss.
“I’m 18! I don’t need to be protected like a kid for god sake.”
“Don’t you dare argue with me,” she said threateningly, “You are the one that is in the wrong.”
I choked back my anger. I could continue to yell with her or try and reach an understanding.
“You’re right,” I said more calmly, “And I want to apologize for that. I should have been honest with you. It would have been a lot easier though if I knew you were more open. I wish you could see my perspective,” I finished.
Mom stood up angrily, “How dare you accuse me of being a close-minded mother! I give you everything Mia! I always try my best! Just go to your room! I can’t stand to see you, or hear you, right now,” she yelled.
“Mom,” I begged, “Please just listen to me; I don’t want to fight!”
“No, get out of my sight!” she yelled again before turning away back into the kitchen.
On the way to my room, my emotions took over. More tears slipped out as I walked up the staircase. I thought that talking to Mom would make things better. I thought she would understand that I had only lied because she had convoluted the idea of me having a boyfriend in the first place. Now I had not only lost Frank and gotten Amanda angry, but I had also fought with my Mom. I had never felt so alone.