Our Words Are Our Years

it’s running in the rain barefoot and freezing, holding your hands over your head, smiling despite the cold. it’s sharing coffee after walking home, and stopping mid-sentence to hug them because that’s all you really want, or stopping anywhere, stepping in front of them and wrapping your arms around them because it’s all you need. it’s saying sorry and I love you constantly, because loving someone doesn’t mean never saying sorry, it means saying it no matter what, always, and leaving it be. it’s joking and being taken seriously when it matters, but hardly ever often. it’s getting just close enough to holding hands to being too close, when even you don’t know what too close it. it’s when everyone around you knows but you, and when you shake your head at their words and warnings. it’s being afraid to leave because it’s hard to imagine being alone.
it’s anything and everything, and I could go on for hours and hours, paragraphs and paragraphs, saying everything it is and everything it’s not but should be, but I’m wasting what little time we have and I just want to get closer and help you feel okay again after last night. I’ll never be able to forget and these subtle hints towards it are floating in every conversation.
I’m sorry and I love you.
we are those five words and nothing more, nothing less.