How to Get Rid of Your Ex Girlfriend

To my surprise, Clark Johnson, star quarterback, basketball star, and official leader of the jocks, approached me the next morning and clapped me on the back. “Brilliant!”

I nearly dropped my Spanish textbook in shock.

Let me give you a little bit of background. You know how most people have got their close friends, and then some other group to fall back on? People you can just talk to when there’s no one else around so you don’t look like a loser? For me, that’s the jock group. Just by playing soccer and lacrosse, I’m automatically part of it. It’s a team sort of thing. So even though I wasn’t playing anything this season, I still shared a mutual friendship with the jocks.

Then my gayness got around. The guys started to laugh at me, insult, even beat me up on occasion – until I made it clear that anyone who so much as whispered “fag” in my presence would be receiving a bloody nose. And I’m pretty strong. Take my anger into account, and you’ve got one hell of a force.

Eventually, they decided to ignore me.

And now? Their king was actually clapping me on the back affectionately and praising me for…something. But before I could ask what this was, he had disappeared down the hallway and thrown his arm over his girlfriend, a shapely brunette called Cassie. She was one of the girls in the “popular” clique, Sophie’s fallback group. We all had one. Lena and Tyler had the nerds, Sam had the slackers, and Vickie…well, Vickie wasn’t the type to care if she was alone or not. But if she happened to want anyone, there was always the theater kids.

I stared after Clark in utter confusion. What the…?

“Fischer!” Andrew, one of my best mates from lacrosse season, shoved me into my locker playfully. “Why didn’t you tell us it was all a joke?”

“Dumbass, that would have ruined it!” Jesse appeared from around the corner, sidling up next to Andrew. He was my other…well, best jock friend.

A grin spread across my face as I staggered away from the locker, rubbing my shoulder. “Cut it!”

“Sorry, mate.”

I gave him a funny look. “My shoulder’s fine.”

“About the other stuff.” Andrew glanced around, having the grace to look ashamed of himself. “Uh…yeah.”

“We kind of put you through hell,” Jesse added.

I contemplated them carefully. They looked just like they always did – athletic clothing and all, though it was winter – except for the absence of the disregarding looks that, for the past couple of months, they had worn whenever they set eyes on me.

“So are we cool?” Andrew held out his fist.

I narrowed my eyes at him, banging my locker shut with my free hand and leaning against it, trying and failing to look casual. “Why are you being so…nice to me?”

Jesse laughed. “I don’t think he knows!”

“Knows what?” I demanded.

“The truth’s out, Fischer! It would have been funnier if you had kept it up ‘till the end of the year like you were going to, but someone told. The whole school knows.”

My eyes went wide at this. No. Oh, no… Dumbfounded, I blurted, “What?”

“I know.” Andrew shrugged sympathetically. “It would have been the best thing if it had lasted. What a thing to reveal at junior prom…but like Jesse said, someone told. At least you won’t have to go through everyone thinking you’re gay, though…”

“Even though it got out early, it’s still the most legit prank all year!” Jesse piped up. “Man, you two even had to kiss! Must have been awkward…”

“I have to go,” I muttered quickly, spinning on my heel. A sort of angry panic was welling in my chest, and if I’d stayed any longer I probably would have ended up exploding in the middle of the hallway. “Uh…I’ll be late for class.”

“Whatever, man.” Andrew held up his hand, and this time I grudgingly accepted his fist bump. “See ‘ya later.”

I made a show of dashing down the hallway, though I had no intention of going remotely near Spanish. Instead, I turned the corner and made straight for the old abandoned janitor’s closet, jerked open the door, and shut myself in the darkness.

The whole school knew. Tyler and I didn’t have an excuse any longer for acting gay.

I stared into the blackness, contemplating what little bit I could see of the far wall. This was the very place where Tyler had asked me to go out with him, back when it really all was just a joke. And now? Now I had no excuse to hold his hand, to cuddle with him, to do all those things a good boyfriend would do and keep him close at all times. If I was truthful with myself, I missed all those things already.

There was a little bit of a bright side. We could still do all those things…do more, even. But only when no one was watching.

Unless we admitted we were really gay?

I almost laughed out loud at this thought. If I couldn’t tell Sam and Lena, of course I wouldn’t be able to suck up the courage to let the whole school know.

º º º

By lunch, I was severely worried Tyler was mad at me. He had left the house without waking me to go to school, and hadn’t looked at me all through World History. Maybe it was paranoia…but I felt like I’d done something wrong. I had no idea what, but I’d definitely done something.

Oh no. What if he didn’t like me back? What if he decided he didn’t like me that first time we made out, and only kissed me yesterday because he was so wasted?

But he had to like me! Why else would he have kissed me in the first place?

Feeling unusually brave, or perhaps just unusually desperate, I pulled a stack of post-it notes out of my pencil case and wrote the only thing I could think of: I love you. Yes. I’m cliché. But what better than those words to describe my feelings for him?

And if he rejected me…it would hurt. Very badly.

At least I’d know.

As I passed his locker on the way to the cafeteria, I smiled to myself, stopped, and pushed the note through the topmost slot. There. Done. I couldn’t back out now, I’d forgotten his combination again.

º º º

When last period rolled by and he still hadn’t said a word to me, I started to regret my bold declaration. Of course, he hadn’t seen it yet, since he only went to his locker before first period and at the end of the day. If only I could get it out somehow…I didn’t want him to see it. Not now. Not when I was sure he didn’t share my feelings.

So I did what any infatuated little girl would do – I stalked him all the way to his locker. I settled myself behind a nearby garbage can, watching him mess with the dial, curse a few times, bang on the locker door, and start all over again. If I were to be sappy, I would mention how perfect he looked today. His hair was once more back to impeccable, and he was wearing – my heart thudded at this – one of MY shirts. I hadn’t really noticed because he owned one that was nearly identical. The giveaway was the bagginess with which it hung off his slim frame, giving the impression that he was much younger than sixteen.

My chest tightened. Okay. Yes, he was fucking adorable, but NO – I was not going to let it bother me. If I thought about kissing him again, it would just make things harder when he turned me down. And god knows it would already be bad enough…

Everything seemed to slow as Tyler pulled the note out of his locker, unfolded it, and read it with a slightly confused expression. I watched blankly, waiting for him to throw it down in disgust or spit on it. But he didn’t. Instead, he turned to smile sappily at the boy standing behind him, one of his nerd friends he’d been hanging out with all day. One of the hotter nerd friends, who pointed to the note and then back to himself, saying something I couldn’t make out.

In response, Tyler kept smiling. I didn’t like the way they were looking at each other. Not at all. Suddenly angry, I popped up from behind the trash can and opened my mouth determinedly.

It was then that Nerd Boy leaned in.

And Tyler, my Tyler…didn’t stop him.