If only we could relive yesterday.

The days were long, and the nights were lonely. I pushed the though of us being over out of my mind, but each time it crept back. It was like a sickness.
I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't stand being here without him. I was hollow, I had no emotions left in me. He was my everything, the very beat to my heart; but now he's gone & I'm left here alone.
"You're so fucking dumb, why did you let him go?"
I went over what I wanted to say a thousand times, but it all slipped away when I saw his precious smile. That smile use to be because of me. His laugh use to come from my cheesy jokes, or dumb mistakes. Those eyes, they use to shine. Because we were in love, and now their dull, and full of pain. That's all because of me. I fucked up, I ruined everything. Sorry can't fix it anymore. I said what I thought I felt, but I was so wrong. This isn't what I want, it never was. I want things to go back to the way they were when we were happy, and together.
You never know what you have until it's gone.