The Wolf In Me

“Tyler, I don’t want to do this,” I said as I sat on his bed. Tyler was pacing around his room gathering supplies. Caroline had helped us plan the whole thing out. We were going to meet her in the woods today.

“Neither do I,” he said. He came over and delicately placed a kiss on my lips. He leaned his forehead on mine and I was wrapped up in his brown eyes. “No matter what happens it’ll be me and you,” he said. I kissed him again and wished everything could just go back to normal. Unfortunately, it couldn’t.

“Come on, we have to go meet Caroline,” I said and got up off the bed. Moving downstairs I went out to the car to wait for Tyler while he got the stuff for tonight.

As I was waiting a woman in a truck drove past. She was blonde and pretty. She walked up to the house and rang the doorbell. Tyler’s mom answered the door and I could see Tyler appear behind her. They both looked confused at the appearance of the woman.

After some greeting and a few exchanged words, Jules was brought into the house and Tyler managed to get out. “Who was that?” I asked as Tyler approached the car.

“A friend of Mason’s,” he said looking troubled. He placed the stuff in the trunk of the car before shutting it and leaning against the back. I could see the tension in his arms. “Apparently he never actually went back to Miami.”

“I’m sure he’s alright,” I said stroking Tyler’s arm trying to comfort him. Silently he moved and got in the driver’s side of the car. I went and got in the passenger’s side as we went to meet Caroline. I couldn’t believe that she actually volunteered to help us considering we were supposed to be enemies.



Tyler and I set up the chains that would help us while Caroline watched. We looped them over and over trying to make sure we wouldn’t break free. Or that we wouldn’t pull them loose once we’d turned.

“Tell me you brought an instructions manual,” said Caroline looking at all our lengths of chain.

“Tell me you brought the wolfsbane,” he responded.

“Yes,” said Caroline and immediately pulled it out. “Not an easy herb to find. This is it,” she said and held it up in the shaft of light that shone through. Tyler stupidly reached out and touched it.

He quickly pulled away as it burned his fingers like acid. He hissed in pain. I immediately went over and inspected his fingers. They were healing perfectly fine.

“Water bottle is in my bag. We can mix it in there,” he said and moved away.

“Okay,” said Caroline and started mixing up the stuff. I went back to making sure the chains were all secure.

“Guy at the hardware store said this stuff was rigged up to 5000lbs.”

“Is that more than a werewolf can pull?” asked Caroline. Tyler got up and pulled on the chains testing their strength.

“Hey, Tyler, how you doing?” asked Caroline.

“Still human,” he said bitterly. He moved passed Caroline and came over to me.

“How are you?” he asked me holding my chin and looking in my eyes.

“Good right now,” I told him in a quiet voice. I was worried about what would happen once the moon shone in the sky.

He then turned and started to take off his shirt. Caroline turned around and started to freak out. “Oh my god, you’re not going to get naked now are you?”

“It’s elastic,” said Tyler pulling on the waistband of his shorts. “I mean what should I wear? I don’t think it’s like the Hulk where I get to keep my pants.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t have that option,” I said lightly glaring at Tyler. I pulled off my shirt to only be wearing a sports bra underneath. A chill went up my spine as the cold air brushed against my skin. I got rid of my sweatpants to be standing in a pair of cotton short shorts and a sports bra. I could feel the cold air wrap around me.

“Let’s get chained up,” said Tyler glumly. With the help of Caroline, Tyler and I wound the chains around our bodies. We hoped and prayed they’d hold us. Just in case Caroline had suggested we chain the gate closed.

“Now what?” asked Caroline.

“Now we wait,” I said and sat down on the hard floor.



“What time is it?” asked Tyler as he paced restlessly. His voice sounded weak. We were both feeling tired and sick of waiting. The constant worry was getting to me. I was sitting against a wall and leaned my head back to rest. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

“It’s almost eight,” said Caroline looking at her phone. “What time does the moon…crest…whatever,” said Caroline.

“Not for awhile,” Tyler said. “Mason’s journal said the first transformation can happen before the moon hits its apex.”

“Does it say how long you’ll actually…be a wolf?” wondered Caroline.

“A few hours,” said Tyler.

“Maybe more, maybe less,” I said sounding just as weak. Both Tyler and I were covered in a layer of sweat despite the cold temperature. It felt like I had just ran a marathon yet I had barely moved. I opened my eyes to see Caroline nod glumly.

Tyler moved forward for the bottle of wolfs bane. His chains were not that long though and he fell before he could reach it. He grabbed the bottle frustrated and walked back where his chains would no longer be taut.

“Are you sure… Are you sure you want to do that?” asked Caroline worried. She knew the pain vervain had on her. She didn’t want Tyler to do that to himself.

“Yeah,” said Tyler opening the bottle. “Mason said it’ll diminish my strength so I can’t break free.” He hesitantly brought the bottle to his lips. Taking a deep breath he started to gulp the ‘poison’ water.

“Tyler,” said Caroline worried and started to stand. Tyler started to choke while drinking it. His body was rejecting it and the pain he was going through didn’t want him to drink anymore. Finally Tyler couldn’t force it down anymore and fell down coughing up what water he could.

“Tyler,” Caroline said worried and went over to him. She rubbed soothing circles on his back trying to comfort him.

“Don’t,” he said trying to push her away. He was too weak and in too much to effectively do it. A part of me was upset that Caroline was comforting Tyler and another part was glad that she was here. Someone had to be strong.

Taking deep breaths Tyler managed to calm down a bit and get rid of the immense pain. He was still down on the ground, his hands clenched and his muscles bunched. He looked up at me and met my eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said looking at Caroline. “Do you want any?” he asked suddenly offering the bottle.

I stared at his eyes and then grabbed the bottle hesitantly. I put the bottle to my lips and hesitated. I saw what it did to Tyler. Could I put myself through that? I’d have to. I quickly started drinking the water as fast as possible. I wanted to get as much down as I could.

The pain started the instant the water touched me. It burned my skin. It felt like acid, melting and eating up my insides. It felt like knives were cutting and slashing away at my esophagus. I put the water bottle down not able to drink anymore. I drank half as much as Tyler did.

“I can’t drink anymore,” I choked out. Tears ran down my cheeks at the pain and I was afraid I’d throw up. I braced my arms on the ground trying to keep myself up and ignore the pain.

“It’s okay,” said Tyler as he came over and wiped the tears away. “It’ll be fine. We’ll be fine,” he assured me. Even though behind his eyes I could tell he was just as scared, nervous, and unsure. We were both new to this and didn’t know what would happen.



I sat lost in my own world. I was drifting in and out of reality, not really paying attention to what was going on. I didn’t want to focus on what was happening. But then Tyler started whimpering and even cried out in pain.

My eyes flew open and I instinctively moved towards him. I almost reached him when the chains pulled me backwards. I fell to my knees and tried to reach Tyler even though I knew it was hopeless. He pulled on the chains around his neck trying to get them off.

“It burns,” he said through the pain. “It burns.” I could see the pain he was going through and I wanted nothing more than to help him. I knew soon enough that I would be going through the same thing.

“I know,” said Caroline trying to comfort him. “Just breathe through this okay.” Tyler started openly weeping and I could just imagine the pain he was going through. Suddenly I felt a surge of heat travel through me like it was burning me up from the inside.

I gave a short cry of pain at the sensation and ran my fingers along the hard ground trying to find some way to give release to the pain. I breathed deeply trying to get through the pain. “You should go,” said Tyler to Caroline. He too was breathing heavily. Caroline gave a sound of refusal. “You should leave,” said Tyler more violently.

“No, not yet,” insisted Caroline. Tyler, already on his hands and knees, fell onto his elbows. I could see the pain he was in and he opened his mouth in a silent scream, choking on the pain. Suddenly his arm shot straight back. It started bending in ways that were not humanly possible. His bones were reshaping themselves. He was becoming a wolf.

Tyler began screaming and crying in pain. Pain I could only imagine for now, pain I would soon experience. Sure enough my own limb started reshaping itself. I fell onto my side in pain. Distantly I could hear Tyler’s cries but the pain blocked out most everything else.

I could feel each one of my bones breaking, throughout my body. They were reshaping, becoming more like the wolf I was. I screamed in pain and agony. It was unbearable. The pain was only fuel to the fire that coursed throughout my body.

“Make it stop,” I screamed. “Make it stop.” The tears fell from eyes. I knew no one would help. Caroline could do nothing but watch and Tyler was fighting his own battle. I gave another loud scream as the bones settled into place.

I lay on the ground as the pain slowly subsided. Each breath was shaky and I only waited for the pain to start again. “I want to help but I don’t know what to do,” said Caroline.

“There’s nothing you can do,” said Tyler also taking shallow, shaky breaths. Tyler moved to get up despite the pain. Gritting his teeth he pushed against the hard floor. But as he got up his body started reshaping again.

From my position on the ground I could see his back arching and the bones that would protrude from his back. He cried out in pain as I the cracking sound was brought to my ears. I closed my eyes not wanting to be here. I didn’t want to see this.

“Get out,” said Tyler forcefully. “Get out.”

“No,” said Caroline adamantly.

“Get out, I don’t want to hurt you,” Tyler managed to say through the pain he must be in.

“No,” said Caroline and then went to comfort Tyler. He gritted his teeth and groaned against the pain as his body still began to shift.

My own body soon joined his. I arched my back off the floor as it popped and reshaped its position. I screamed in pain, the sound echoing in the space we were in. Fresh tears made their way down my face. I wanted this to end.

The pain was so immense I couldn’t take it. I knew it would be horrible. I had watched the video of Mason changing. But to experience it was a whole other obstacle. One could not imagine the magnitude of pain that coursed through my body. I had never experienced pain like it in my life.

The pain seemed to last forever, it was never ending agony. Finally once it ceased I huddled on the floor, my body trying to make itself as small as possible. I whimpered against the spasms of pain that still rocked my body.

I was panting now. My body was covered in a layer of sweat. I could feel my hair plastered to the back of my neck. My hair stuck to my forehead and my face but I was too weak, too tired to even attempt to remove it.

“How are you doing?” Caroline asked me, kneeling beside me. Thankfully she pushed the hair out of my face so I could see more easily. Not that I wanted to. All there was too look at was the painfully huddled body of Tyler.

“You…should leave,” I panted. “It’s not…safe.”

“No, I’m staying,” she insisted. Tyler joined my pleas but Caroline remained adamant about staying. Then Tyler’s body once again shifted and he cried out in renewed pain. The experience was never ending and I prayed that it finally would.

Caroline went over to Tyler to try and comfort him. When she gave a cry of shock and surprise I managed to lift my head and look over. Caroline immediately ran away from Tyler in a blur of movement.

Flipping onto his stomach Tyler stood up on his hands and feet. As his eyes roamed the cavern I caught a glimpse of them. They were no longer the warm brown eyes I had come to love. They were now a golden yellow color. I could see the canines of his teeth.

I could feel the wolf inside me now. I could feel its call. It wanted to take over and I fought against it. It was an animal, an uncontrollable beast. Quickly Caroline shut the gate to the cavern just as Tyler lunged for her. The chains were the only thing stopping him.

My own wolf urged me to join the pursuit. It wanted to hunt, to kill. Frantically Caroline locked the gate. Realizing the chains kept him from getting the prize Tyler ran to the stake that kept him down. With one giant pull it came loose and he was free.

Tyler lunged at the gate trying to get to Caroline. He pulled at it frantically trying to get to her. The wolf inside me surged forward. I had to join him. I had to help him kill the prey. I could feel my canines lengthen and sharpen. I could feel my mind snap, become primal. With a growl that sounded more animal than human I lunged forward.