Losing Lori
; One
Every morning I wake up and it’s the exact same thing. Groan, stretch, yawn – maybe not all in that exact order – get up, slug into the bathroom, shower. After the shower, I have no idea what goes on in my life. Absolutely no idea. Maybe it’s because I ignore the world around me now, maybe it’s because I’m not perceptive anymore. I don’t have a clue. I just know that getting up is the easiest part of the day.
I’m half asleep then. If anything hurts me, I barely feel it. Showering wakes me up though, and maybe a little too fast. I don’t want to resurface from you, Lori. I hate waking up and knowing you’re not beside me. I hate knowing you never will be again. I hate not hearing from you. I know I probably never will again.
No one ever understood my infatuation with you, Lor. I did, though. I understand everything about myself when it comes to you. You’re impossible to forget, impossible to get rid of…and believe me, those first few weeks, I tried to leave. I tried to push you away. I didn’t want you. I wonder sometimes if this is payback for how I treated you, but I know it’s not. I know you were just playing mind games. I know now that even if you did love me, I always loved you more. I was the chaser in a game of endless tag...and I never did catch you. You slipped away every time I had you right where I wanted you.
I guess you won the game though, seeing as you’re not here.
You always won.
I’m half asleep then. If anything hurts me, I barely feel it. Showering wakes me up though, and maybe a little too fast. I don’t want to resurface from you, Lori. I hate waking up and knowing you’re not beside me. I hate knowing you never will be again. I hate not hearing from you. I know I probably never will again.
No one ever understood my infatuation with you, Lor. I did, though. I understand everything about myself when it comes to you. You’re impossible to forget, impossible to get rid of…and believe me, those first few weeks, I tried to leave. I tried to push you away. I didn’t want you. I wonder sometimes if this is payback for how I treated you, but I know it’s not. I know you were just playing mind games. I know now that even if you did love me, I always loved you more. I was the chaser in a game of endless tag...and I never did catch you. You slipped away every time I had you right where I wanted you.
I guess you won the game though, seeing as you’re not here.
You always won.
♠ ♠ ♠
I am in a great mood this evening, hehe. I'm also really glad you guys liked the prologue for this story. I was a little iffy, but thanks to all my subscribers and commenters so far. Don't just be a reader/subscriber, comment! I read every one, I'll most likely reply, and questions are welcome.