Have You Ever Really Danced On the Edge?

I collapsed on Vic’s couch in his living room. He raises his eyebrows at me but I just shrug.

"I just biked like 14 miles to your house," I explain. He raises his eyebrows higher, if that's even possible.

"You realize it's only like… 9 miles?"

"That’s still a bitch!"

"Then why are you even biking in the first place?" Vic asks.

I hesitate and he laughs, "you know what, I don't even know."

"Wow, I will never understand you."

I stick my tongue out and mimic several octaves higher, "Wow, I will never understand you."

Vic lets out a bark of laughter, "Shut up I do not sound like that."

I mimic in the same high voice, "BUT WHAT IF I CAN’T FORGET YOU! I’LL BURN YOUR NAME INTO MY THROAT; I’LL BE THE FIRE THAT’LL CATCH YOU! I’m Vic and I can hi-iiigh!"

"I’m going to kill you!" Vic shouts and soon assaults my arm with pinches. We playfully fight for a while, wheezing with laughter. We let our laughter cool and then just sit, enjoying each other’s company.

"So," I say finally, "Where’s Mike today?"

"He’s actually tracking some drums today. I was going to go with, but then some hussy showed up on my doorstep."

I raise my eyebrows, "Really! That’s great, Vic. And did you really call me a hussy? Who says that?"

He huffs, "Me."

"Yeah," I add, "You’re the only one." We bicker about the word hussy for a bit, and then relax again in the quiet.

"It’s really cool to hang out with you again," Vic ends the silence. "Just as friends and all. Being your friend is good."

I nod, feeling so happy in that moment. This is all I’ve ever wanted to hear. "Yeah, I agree. Especially with all of that other junk we went through."

He smiles, and pauses. "And… and you know you could tell me anything, right Anna? If we’re going to be friends, I want it to be the real thing. Not awkward or anything, you know? I definitely want to see the next guy that comes around… maybe intimidate him or something."

I laugh then freeze… oh god. Vic was obviously saying this on his own terms, but it was hitting very close to home with my newly acquired boyfriend.

I hesitate and unfortunately he notices. First he laughs, somewhat awkwardly, "What? Got a new boy-toy already?"

I look away, not wanting to speak. What the hell is up with this timing? I’m starting to think God hates me.

"Oh, so you do…" Vic teases. "What’s his name? Brandon?"

I gulp – Vic freezes, "Jesus Christ… it’s not Brandon is it?" I freeze as well, not knowing what to do.

It’s like time has stopped, we stare at each other heavily for a long time. "Vic please don't be mad –" I start, but he raises his hand.

"And I thought we could be friends," He said and got up from the couch, where we were sitting by each other. "Maybe you should leave, Anna."

I sit up straighter and open my mouth to object but Vic says more forcefully, "You should leave, Anna."

I hang my head. Shit. Everything is fucked up… again.

I then realize I have to bike back into town. Fuck my life.

- - - -

It's later that night and I'm thinking about how I had royally screwed up everything. My mood definitely influenced the whole house; Taylor and Jaime were currently fighting downstairs. I couldn't help but cringe – if Taylor and Jaime broke up, it'd just Taylor and me. And we weren't ready to make new friends.

Pierce the Veil were our only friends, the only people we felt comfortable with. And now we were both screwing it up – or at least, I infinitely had.

A few seconds later, and my phone buzzes. It's Laura. I felt a weird feeling go through my stomach but I pick it up anyway.

"Hey Laura!" I say brightly. I hear a pause.

"Hi Annabel," She says and pauses again.

"Hey are you okay? I remember Brandon telling me Ian's parties usually get crazy. You're not lost or anything, are you? Did someone try to touch you without your permission?" I say, instantly worried by her strange demeanor.

"No, no, I'm fine, really. I just stepped out of Ian's for a while to call you. It's… kind of serious though."

I bite my fingernails, "Is Brandon okay?"

"Um… well something's wrong with him for sure," Laura spits out bitterly.

"What are you talking about?" I nearly yell out, wanting this whole beat-around-the-bush thing to end.

"I saw Brandon tonight at Ian's party… and well, I'd hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you told me to keep an eye on him, right? And, he… tonight he, I saw him with Chelsea Markus, Annabel." She stutters a bit then goes on, "They were kissing and laughing and having a grand old time. I overheard Bran talking to Ian about how happy he was they were together. Apparently they've been dating the past few weeks."

The phone slides out of my hand at the shock. It feels like someone is punching me in the stomach repeatedly.