Back To December
Sober?
BTD 22
I laughed at one of Tyler's jokes as Antoine did my make up.
" God I've missed you guys!!" I squealed, jumping up and down on my seat.
Antoine gave me a stern look and set down his brush.
"I heard about your little overdose. "
Tyler sucked in a breath and went pale," Kara? Wh-what is he talking about?"
I bit my lip, slouching.
" it was a stupid accident, nothing more. Let's just drop it. "
The boys were silent for the rest of the hour.
----------
" Kara! You're on in ten!!" someone yelled. I nodded, taking calming breaths.
I was wearing black, ripped skinny jeans, a red tank top, and studded black stilettos.
I adjusted my bracelets and a woman came up to set up my mic system.
" So...which song first?" my drummer, Alicia asked. Alicia was a petite blonde with big green eyes.
I looked to her, biting my lip.
" Ughhh...Sober, I guess." I decided. She nodded, running to go tell the others.
I the crowd go wild, I guess the announcer came up.
" Hello Forks!!!" a man yelled. The crowd screamed.
" we have a special guest, someone we all know..KARA!!"
The was a deafening scream as I walked out, microphone in hand, smiling.
" What's up, guys?" I asked. I spotted Paul, Jared, and Embry in the crowd. I gave them a small wave.
" I know I've been gone for a while, I'm sorry. Yeah, BUT, I have some new songs, and you guys ate the first to hear them, sound good?"
*screams*
I laughed," Okay, this first one is called Sober. "
I nodded to Alicia and the lead guitarist, Aaron.
" Here it goes...
I don't wanna be the girl who laughs the loudest
Or the girl who never wants to be alone
I don't wanna be that call at four o'clock in the mornin'
'Cause I'm the only one you know in the world that won't be home
Ah, the sun is blindin'
I stayed up again
Oh, I am findin'
That that's not the way I want my story to end
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're my protection
But how do I feel this good sober?
I don't wanna be the girl that has to fill the silence
The quiet scares me 'cause it screams the truth
Please don't tell me that we had that conversation
'Cause I won't remember, save your breath 'cause what's the use?
Ah, the night is callin'
And it whispers to me softly, "Come and play"
I, I am fallin'
And if I let myself go I'm the only one to blame
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?
Comin' down, comin' down, comin' down
Spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round
I'm lookin' for myself, sober
Comin' down, comin' down, comin' down
Spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round
Lookin' for myself, sober
When it's good then it's good, it's so good till it goes bad
Till you're trying to find the you that you once had
I have heard myself cry, "Never again"
Broken down in agony, just tryin' find a friend
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?
How do I feel this good sober?"
I finish with a shaky breath and I locked eyes with Paul.
I've never been good at expressing emotions. That's why I write songs. Maybe with this song, he'll finally understand all the things I can't say.
I saw Paul mouth," I love you"
And I smiled, clearing my throat.
" You like that?" I smiled at the feedback blaring in my ears," okay, here's another, it's called Raise Your Glass...
" Right right, turn off the lights
We gonna lose our minds tonight
What's the deal,yo?
I love when it's all too much
5 AM turn the radio up
Where's the rock and roll?
Party crasher, penny snatcher
Call me up if you are gangsta'
Don't be fancy
Just get dancey
Why so serious?
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be, never be
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
Won't you come on, and come on, and
Raise your glass
Just come on and come and
Raise Your Glass!
Slam slam oh hot damn
What part of party don't you understand?
Wish you'd just freak out (freak out already)
Can't stop coming in hot
I should be locked up right on the spot
It's so on right now (so fuckin' on right now)
Party crasher, penny snatcher
Call me up if you a gangsta'
Don't be fancy
Just get dancey
Why so serious?
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be, never be
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
Won't you come on, and come on, and
Raise your glass
Just come on and come and
Raise Your Glass!
Won't you come on and come on and
Raise your glass!
Just come on and come and
Raise your glass!
Oh shit my glass is empty...
that sucks !
So if you're too school for cool (I mean...)
And you're treated like a fool (treated like a fool)
You could choose to let it go
We can always, we can always
party on our own...
So raise your (Aw fuck)
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be, never be
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be never be!
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
Won't you come on! and come on! and
Raise your glass
Just come on and come and
Raise your glass
Won't you come on! and come on! and
Raise your glass
For me
Just come on and come and
Raise your glass...for me"
I smiled and laughed, giving a silly face to my band who smiled shaking their heads. They're used to weird me.
I took the mic again. " okay this is a special song I wrote..for a very special man in my life," I looked across the see of people to see three smiling shifters, but Paul's smile was the largest.
" hope you love it, Paul. It's called Chasing Cars,"
" We'll do it all
Everything
On our own
We don't need
Anything
Or anyone
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads
I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life
All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?"
I sang the song to him with tears in my eyes.
I blinked a couple times and turned to the crowd, sitting on my stool.
" okay, I'm only scheduled to do four songs. That means I have one left," I heard groans and laughed," but I'm gonna let you guys pick it. What do YOU want ME to sing? hmm?"
I heard shouts of " miss independent", and " when you're gone", but mostly I heard ," if I die young"
I giggled, " okay, If I Die Young it is,
" if I die young
Bury me in Satin
Lay me down in a bed of roses
Sink me in the river
At dawn
Send me away with the words
Of a love song
Oh oh
Oh oh
Lord make me a rainbow
I'll shine down on my mother
She'll know I'm safe with you
When she stands under my colors
Oh and
Life ain't always what
You think it ought to be, no
Ain't even gray but she buries her baby
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
if I die young
Bury me in Satin
Lay me down in a bed of roses
Sink me in the river
At dawn
Send me away with the words
Of a love song
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
And I'll be wearing white
When I come into your kingdom
I'm a green as the ring on my little cold finger
I've never known the loving of a man
But it sure felt nice when
He was holding my hand
There's a boy here in town
Says he'll love me forever
Who would of thought forever
Could be severed by
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
So put on your best, boys
And I'll wear my pearls
What I never did is done
A penny for your thoughts
Oh no
I'll sell em for a dollar
They're worth so much more
After I'm a gonner
And maybe then you'll hear
The words I've been singing
Funny when you're dead,
How people start listening
if I die young
Bury me in Satin
Lay me down in a bed of roses
Sink me in the river
At dawn
Send me away with the words
Of a love song
The ballad of a dove
Go with peace and love
Gather up your tears
Keep em in your pocket
Save em for a day when your really gonna need um
Oh
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
So put on your best boys
And I'll wear my pearls"
I finished the show with a bang, and after giving my goodbyes, I ran offstage and into the dressing room.
Tyler tossed me a water as I collapsed on the couch.
" you did good girl. "
" thanks" I Panted.
There was a knock on the door.
" Come in!" Tyler yelled.
My three shifters came in, smiling.
I smiled back.
" Hey guys," I greeted. Paul kissed my cheek and sat beside be, while Jared and Embry landed on opposite chairs.
" Guys you remember Tyler, right?" I asked. They nodded.
" Hey man"
" Sup"
After relaxing for a bit, Paul and I left to enjoy the remainder if our anniversary while the two baboons went off to patrol.
I laughed at one of Tyler's jokes as Antoine did my make up.
" God I've missed you guys!!" I squealed, jumping up and down on my seat.
Antoine gave me a stern look and set down his brush.
"I heard about your little overdose. "
Tyler sucked in a breath and went pale," Kara? Wh-what is he talking about?"
I bit my lip, slouching.
" it was a stupid accident, nothing more. Let's just drop it. "
The boys were silent for the rest of the hour.
----------
" Kara! You're on in ten!!" someone yelled. I nodded, taking calming breaths.
I was wearing black, ripped skinny jeans, a red tank top, and studded black stilettos.
I adjusted my bracelets and a woman came up to set up my mic system.
" So...which song first?" my drummer, Alicia asked. Alicia was a petite blonde with big green eyes.
I looked to her, biting my lip.
" Ughhh...Sober, I guess." I decided. She nodded, running to go tell the others.
I the crowd go wild, I guess the announcer came up.
" Hello Forks!!!" a man yelled. The crowd screamed.
" we have a special guest, someone we all know..KARA!!"
The was a deafening scream as I walked out, microphone in hand, smiling.
" What's up, guys?" I asked. I spotted Paul, Jared, and Embry in the crowd. I gave them a small wave.
" I know I've been gone for a while, I'm sorry. Yeah, BUT, I have some new songs, and you guys ate the first to hear them, sound good?"
*screams*
I laughed," Okay, this first one is called Sober. "
I nodded to Alicia and the lead guitarist, Aaron.
" Here it goes...
I don't wanna be the girl who laughs the loudest
Or the girl who never wants to be alone
I don't wanna be that call at four o'clock in the mornin'
'Cause I'm the only one you know in the world that won't be home
Ah, the sun is blindin'
I stayed up again
Oh, I am findin'
That that's not the way I want my story to end
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're my protection
But how do I feel this good sober?
I don't wanna be the girl that has to fill the silence
The quiet scares me 'cause it screams the truth
Please don't tell me that we had that conversation
'Cause I won't remember, save your breath 'cause what's the use?
Ah, the night is callin'
And it whispers to me softly, "Come and play"
I, I am fallin'
And if I let myself go I'm the only one to blame
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?
Comin' down, comin' down, comin' down
Spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round
I'm lookin' for myself, sober
Comin' down, comin' down, comin' down
Spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round
Lookin' for myself, sober
When it's good then it's good, it's so good till it goes bad
Till you're trying to find the you that you once had
I have heard myself cry, "Never again"
Broken down in agony, just tryin' find a friend
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?
I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?
How do I feel this good sober?"
I finish with a shaky breath and I locked eyes with Paul.
I've never been good at expressing emotions. That's why I write songs. Maybe with this song, he'll finally understand all the things I can't say.
I saw Paul mouth," I love you"
And I smiled, clearing my throat.
" You like that?" I smiled at the feedback blaring in my ears," okay, here's another, it's called Raise Your Glass...
" Right right, turn off the lights
We gonna lose our minds tonight
What's the deal,yo?
I love when it's all too much
5 AM turn the radio up
Where's the rock and roll?
Party crasher, penny snatcher
Call me up if you are gangsta'
Don't be fancy
Just get dancey
Why so serious?
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be, never be
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
Won't you come on, and come on, and
Raise your glass
Just come on and come and
Raise Your Glass!
Slam slam oh hot damn
What part of party don't you understand?
Wish you'd just freak out (freak out already)
Can't stop coming in hot
I should be locked up right on the spot
It's so on right now (so fuckin' on right now)
Party crasher, penny snatcher
Call me up if you a gangsta'
Don't be fancy
Just get dancey
Why so serious?
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be, never be
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
Won't you come on, and come on, and
Raise your glass
Just come on and come and
Raise Your Glass!
Won't you come on and come on and
Raise your glass!
Just come on and come and
Raise your glass!
Oh shit my glass is empty...
that sucks !
So if you're too school for cool (I mean...)
And you're treated like a fool (treated like a fool)
You could choose to let it go
We can always, we can always
party on our own...
So raise your (Aw fuck)
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be, never be
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways
All my underdogs, we will never be never be!
Anything but loud
And nitty gritty dirty little freaks
Won't you come on! and come on! and
Raise your glass
Just come on and come and
Raise your glass
Won't you come on! and come on! and
Raise your glass
For me
Just come on and come and
Raise your glass...for me"
I smiled and laughed, giving a silly face to my band who smiled shaking their heads. They're used to weird me.
I took the mic again. " okay this is a special song I wrote..for a very special man in my life," I looked across the see of people to see three smiling shifters, but Paul's smile was the largest.
" hope you love it, Paul. It's called Chasing Cars,"
" We'll do it all
Everything
On our own
We don't need
Anything
Or anyone
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads
I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life
All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?"
I sang the song to him with tears in my eyes.
I blinked a couple times and turned to the crowd, sitting on my stool.
" okay, I'm only scheduled to do four songs. That means I have one left," I heard groans and laughed," but I'm gonna let you guys pick it. What do YOU want ME to sing? hmm?"
I heard shouts of " miss independent", and " when you're gone", but mostly I heard ," if I die young"
I giggled, " okay, If I Die Young it is,
" if I die young
Bury me in Satin
Lay me down in a bed of roses
Sink me in the river
At dawn
Send me away with the words
Of a love song
Oh oh
Oh oh
Lord make me a rainbow
I'll shine down on my mother
She'll know I'm safe with you
When she stands under my colors
Oh and
Life ain't always what
You think it ought to be, no
Ain't even gray but she buries her baby
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
if I die young
Bury me in Satin
Lay me down in a bed of roses
Sink me in the river
At dawn
Send me away with the words
Of a love song
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
And I'll be wearing white
When I come into your kingdom
I'm a green as the ring on my little cold finger
I've never known the loving of a man
But it sure felt nice when
He was holding my hand
There's a boy here in town
Says he'll love me forever
Who would of thought forever
Could be severed by
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
So put on your best, boys
And I'll wear my pearls
What I never did is done
A penny for your thoughts
Oh no
I'll sell em for a dollar
They're worth so much more
After I'm a gonner
And maybe then you'll hear
The words I've been singing
Funny when you're dead,
How people start listening
if I die young
Bury me in Satin
Lay me down in a bed of roses
Sink me in the river
At dawn
Send me away with the words
Of a love song
The ballad of a dove
Go with peace and love
Gather up your tears
Keep em in your pocket
Save em for a day when your really gonna need um
Oh
The sharp knife
Of a short life
Well I've had just enough time
So put on your best boys
And I'll wear my pearls"
I finished the show with a bang, and after giving my goodbyes, I ran offstage and into the dressing room.
Tyler tossed me a water as I collapsed on the couch.
" you did good girl. "
" thanks" I Panted.
There was a knock on the door.
" Come in!" Tyler yelled.
My three shifters came in, smiling.
I smiled back.
" Hey guys," I greeted. Paul kissed my cheek and sat beside be, while Jared and Embry landed on opposite chairs.
" Guys you remember Tyler, right?" I asked. They nodded.
" Hey man"
" Sup"
After relaxing for a bit, Paul and I left to enjoy the remainder if our anniversary while the two baboons went off to patrol.
♠ ♠ ♠
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