Born and Broken Every Single Time.

I headed straight back home, which sadly for me was in a completely different direction to where Gerard had headed. I strolled in the door, scurrying up the stairs and walking straight into Mikey’s room. He was sitting up in his bed texting and greeted me with a look of utter shock.

"Why didn’t you wake me before you went out?" he frowned, putting his phone down briefly.

"I tried," I smirked. "You just grunted."

"Liar," he blushed, knowing it was true but attempting to cover his tracks. I slumped in the chair as he started throwing his phone up in the air and catching it repeatedly. As he distracted himself, I just thought to myself, growing more and more disheartened as I did. Mikey threw a cushion at me which snapped me from my thoughts. I just pouted immaturely.

"Where did you go?"

"Home," I muttered, biting my lip as I waited to gage his reaction.

"Oh," he began calmly. "Uh, how did it go?"

"Okay," I lied, forcing a smile. I wanted him to believe that my mum had maybe changed because his attitude and response would suit that belief. If he acted like she had changed, maybe I could truly believe it myself. Maybe…

"Well that’s good," he smiled. "Do you think you’ll move-"

"I don’t know," I interrupted. I didn’t mean to interrupt but the topic was a tad dodgy for me. He seemed slightly surprised by my interruption but nodded an acceptance of my reply.

"Did you see Gerard when you were out?" he continued.

"What?" I blurted out. "W-why would I see him? Why would you think that? Uh-"

"Calm," he interjected, smirking at how my words sped up as question followed question. "He left soon after I heard you go, I figured he’d be with you."

"I saw him," I began slowly. "But then he left."

"Where’d he go?" he asked, yawning overdramatically and causing me to giggle. I just shrugged dismissively and he sighed, seeming to just accept the randomness of his brother.

I just curled my legs up to my chest, resting my feet on the edge of the chair so I didn’t fall and thought away to myself. I had an overriding urge to ask Mikey about his brother moving but didn’t have the heart to touch upon the topic. I didn’t dare risk my emotions making me look a fool. The last thing I needed to do was cry, and should I talk about this to Mikey there was no guarantee I could hold back tears. He seemed content as he continued to text. I assumed it was Alicia by the dopey grin on his face and just smiled at seeing that side of him.

About half an hour later the front door slammed shut. I was now lying on the floor just because I found it comfortable and Mikey was telling me some more of his random anecdotes. As we heard the footsteps slowly draw closer and walk past the room, Mikey called out his brother’s name, assuming correctly of who the visitor was.

"What?" he groaned as he swung the door open lazily. He looked straight at his brother, not seeming to acknowledge me at all. I understood his distancing, but this was just pathetic.

"Where did you go?" Mikey frowned, noticing a small carrier bag he clutched in his hand.

"I had to buy a compass," he shrugged, making me giggle slightly and causing him to glare briefly at me before returning his gaze to his brother. At least he acknowledged me, even in a glare.

"Are you lost?" Mikey smirked. "Your room’s that way."

"Not that kind smart ass," Gerard moaned. "The one to draw circles with that stupid point thing on it. I need to engrave something, okay?"

"What the fuck?" Mikey laughed. "You’re such an idiot."

"Whatever," he groaned, closing the door behind him as he returned to his own room.

I looked at Mikey silently for a moment before we both burst out laughing. He was a peculiar guy at the best of times, but randomly engraving things was a new level of ’weird’. As our laughter finally subsided slightly Mikey seemed to become a bit more serious as he looked down at me, still giggling from our outburst.

"What are you going to do when he leaves?" Mikey questioned. My laughter stopped dead.

"I, uh, go home?" I mumbled. It hit me then that this was my only real option. I know that the Way household would gladly let me stay for as long as I wanted, but I couldn’t be their replacement son. Sure, life could maybe be better for me in a house with my best friend and his blood, but I couldn’t take the place of their eldest and leave my own flesh and blood behind. It kind of stung to know that I’d have to go back.

"You know you could have Gerard’s r-"

"No," I said sternly. "I can’t."

Mikey didn’t say anything at first, just nodding as he seemed to understand why without me having to explain it. He repositioned himself slightly, before looking at me with a sceptical look and continuing.

"This won’t change anything with us, will it?" he frowned.

"No… why would you say that?" I questioned. I could feel my jaw drop slightly at the thought this could change anything. But the one thing that overpowered all else was casting my mind back to when his brother asked me the same question. When I just looked at him and lied through my teeth. What I didn’t realise at the time was that he saw right through me, even then. I prayed for everything just to be different.

"I don’t know," he shrugged. "You’re my best friend. Now my brother’s leaving and you’ll be going back to yours too. I’ll feel alone."

"Well sometimes it’s just as hard to leave as it is to be left behind," I shrugged. I hadn’t meant it, but I’d recited his words, realising that in this discussion they were the perfect response. I saw a faint smile grace Mikey’s face before he turned his attention back to his phone. I sat for a moment, casting my mind over the words I had just spoken.

"Be right back Mikes," I said as I dragged myself off the floor. "I need to do something."