Change

I stood in the dairy aisle, hauling bags of milk up onto the shelves. I couldn't get my mind off of what Taylor had said. I yanked my hand away as I felt some condensation drip onto my hand, mentally cursing. Some country song was playing, and I was nearly driven to insanity by the singers' twangy voice. I inhaled a deep breath, closing my eyes before letting it out louder than I intended. I was extremely annoyed. I wanted to blame it on the music ringing obnoxiously through my ears, but I knew that wasn't the case.

Did I really hate Taylor Hall?

Of course I didn't. Especially not after yesterday. I hated to admit it, but I knew that he was right. I had been trying to find reasons to hate him. I was so used to the idea of being angry with him, that I didn't know what to do when I felt that starting to change. My defense mechanism was to think about all the reasons I didn't like the guy who had made me miserable during my last two high school years. It was unexpected, a sincere apology, and I had been caught off guard.

Which is why I now stood in my parents' store, my thoughts occupied solely with the one thing I had tried to forget.

I moved on to the yogurt section, starting with the blueberry flavour.

I knew the solution wasn't forgetting Taylor, it was learning to accept it and move on. I was a big girl now, right?

And so that's why, when I finished placing the yogurt containers on the shelves, I found myself sheepishly asking my mother for the Hall's home address from the store directory. I walked out to my car and started the ignition before I could change my mind. I was now standing in front of a tall wooden door, debating whether to ring or to knock. I went with ringing, regretting it as an abnormally loud bell sounded throughout the house.

I heard footsteps almost as soon as the bell had finished ringing, and my heart started racing. As the door was pulled open, I was face to face with Taylor and his surprised blue eyes. I took a deep breath and motioned with my hand for him to join me on the front steps. I sat down, feeling stupid for a moment as he stood there, but letting out a relieved sigh as he sat down next to me. Our shoulders were gently pressed together due to the narrowness of the concrete stairs, and Taylor's hands were clasped together in between his knees. I felt his eyes on me and noticed him tapping his foot impatiently.

I released a shaky breath before speaking, finally meeting his eyes.

"I've been thinking, and I realized that there's really no reason for me not to forgive you." Taylor's eyes drifted to the ground and a tiny smile crept onto his face. He let out a small, relieved sigh before meeting my eyes again. His face was serious again, but I knew I had seen the smile. Despite myself, I felt the corners of my lips turn up into a smile, and I hid it with a slight cough. "We've both grown up. We're not those stupid kids anymore. I thought you still might be... I mean, with all the hype around you... I thought your ego might have grown even bigger." I tried to make a joke out of it, but as I let out a light laugh, Taylor glanced away awkwardly. I cleared my throat, before interrupting the awkward silence. "Sorry, um... That was supposed to be funny. It wasn't, but... uh..." I scratched my forehead, trying desperately to come up with something clever. "Yeah. I'll stop talking now."

Taylor sat there in silence. The air was thick with discomfort, and I scuffed at the ground with the toe of my shoe, my hands in the pockets of my sweater. I tucked my hair behind my ears and nodded to myself before standing to leave.

"Wait."

I stopped abruptly, chewing the inside of my cheek as I turned back to him. He stood up and took a step toward me.

"You do have to stop talking right now." I was taken aback, before I realized that by the smile on his face, he had tried to make a joke. His smile faded and he cleared his throat. "Another bad joke. I meant, we have to stop talking because I have to run some errands for my mom..." He scratched his head. "But do you want to go for brunch tomorrow?"

My mouth fell ajar slightly in surprise, but I snapped it shut quickly. I gave him a slight nod. "Sure."

"Cool." Taylor didn't try to hide his smile. "Sally's at 11:00?"

***

I walked into the small diner tucked away in a small corner of the west end of Windsor. I turned my head to both sides, finally catching a glimpse of Taylor's dirty blonde hair in a booth by the window, on the same side as the door. I made my way over, careful to watch my step on the red-and-white checkered floor. It looked like it had just been cleaned, and I didn't need to fall on my butt at this very moment.

As I slid into the booth, Taylor's head snapped up and a smile shot across his face.

"Hey."

"Hey," I smiled back. I broke away from his gaze and looked out the window, viewing the buildings across the lake. It was pretty in a grungy, downtown art scene kind of way. I then proceeded to look down at my hands, fiddling with them under the table.

"You hungry?"

I met Taylor's blue eyes again and nodded. "Starving." I let out a light laugh that came out sounding nervous. It was all because of those stupid eyes of his...

The waitress walked over and flipped open her notepad. She glanced from me to Taylor, and her bored expression changed. A wide smile spread across her face.

"Travis! No." She snapped her fingers. "Taylor!"

He glanced at me before smiling up at her. "Yeah, hi."

"I'm a big fan," she declared. I looked between the two of them, observing Taylor's actions. As she gushed on and on, telling Taylor about how she and her dad had followed him since he was little, I was amazed as he continued to nod and smile. Not a smile that looked plastered on, either - the smile looked real. I knew for a fact that if that had been me, I wouldn't have been able to hide my annoyance. I was enthralled. I had to check to make sure my mouth was closed as I stared at him, watching him interact. It was pretty incredible. He glanced at me every so often and I would give him a reassuring smile. She finally decided to take our orders and headed back into the kitchen.

"Sorry," Taylor said almost immediately. "It can get a little crazy sometimes."

I leaned back against the seat and shrugged, giving him a small smile. "It's okay." I picked at the worn-out table cloth that matched the pattern on the floor. "You're really good at that," I pointed out.

He smiled, "I'm used to it by now."

A meal and two shakes later, I offered to split the cost but Taylor insisted on paying. We headed outside, side by side, and headed down the block.

The rest of lunch had been pretty uneventful. Taylor told me about his roommate in Edmonton, Jordan Eberle, and I told him about my roommate, Blair, back in university. I asked him how he liked being in the NHL, and he seemed to tense up a bit. I quickly let the subject drop and we talked about our families and how I was enjoying university. He seemed genuinely interested in my talking about my sociology course and my life back in Thunder Bay. We pretty much avoided talk of high school altogether, to which I was grateful.

It was a nice, sunny, warm day outside - the kind with a perfect measure of warmth and a slight breeze. We walked down the sidewalk and I enjoyed the slight rush of air as it brushed against my skin and ran through my hair.

"It's a nice day," I commented.

"It is," he agreed. We turned a corner and I glanced at him curiously. "Don't worry, I know where I'm going," he assured me.

I laughed and we continued down the street, heading towards Coventri Gardens. Right before the entrance to the garden, on a small patch of grassy area, was a playground. There were only a few kids around, since it was lunchtime, and they were all on the slides and monkey bars. Off in the back corner, there was a set of swings. Taylor grinned at me and we headed over as I shook my head, laughing.

We sat down on the swings, side by side, and I smiled, leaning my face against the cool metal bars as I pushed back and forth gently with my feet.

"What are you smiling about?"

I turned the swing to the side so that I was facing him. "I haven't been on a playground in so long." My eyes fell to the sand at my feet and I sighed. "I haven't been able to just be a kid in a while."

I saw Taylor nod out of the corner of my eye. "I guess some kid ruining your last two years of high school didn't help, eh?"

I looked up at him, shaking my head frantically. "No, I..." I paused. "Taylor," I said softly. "I wasn't even thinking about that to be honest."

He didn't answer and I tried desperately to change the mood.

"I'm sure you haven't been able to be a kid since you were... How old?"

He smiled a bit at that. "Since I was 12 and Don Cherry mentioned my name."

"Don Cherry?" I raised my eyebrows. "That's a pretty big deal."

Taylor shrugged. "Yeah, it was pretty cool." I saw a smile creeping onto his face.

"Pretty cool? Come on." I nudged him, grinning, and he laughed. The silence between us resumed as we enjoyed the summer air.

***

I headed into the grocery store the following morning, my mind full of things I had to do. My parents were short two workers today, not including Belle, who had gone to the beach with her cousins. So that was three. And my workload was going to be crazy.

Belle had come over yesterday afternoon when I had gotten home from my outing with Taylor, and she had nagged me nonstop for all the details.

I waved good morning to my dad and headed to my first job of the day; putting the pastas on the shelves. I rounded the corner of the pasta aisle, and stopped in my tracks. Kneeling on the floor, grabbing packages of pasta from a box to place on the bottom shelf, was Taylor.

I stared for a moment before taking slow steps toward him. He must have heard me as he looked up, a smile taking over his face.

"Hey," he said nonchalantly, as though him working in my parents' grocery store was completely normal.

"Hi...?"

Taylor glanced at me. He placed all the packages on the shelf before standing up and facing me.

"I can't tell whether you're mad or just upset."

I shook my head, a smile making it's way onto my lips. "Neither. I'm surprised."

"Good or bad surprise?"

I shrugged before jokingly replying, "Not too bad." I gently pushed past him and started to hand him pastas from the box to put on the shelves. "So what brings you here today?"

"I had nothing to do today. I remembered you telling me yesterday that your parents were short a few workers today, so I thought I'd volunteer."

I tried to hide my surprised face. I was impressed. I did remember briefly mentioning it to him at the diner yesterday, but I was surprised he remembered.

"Well, I know my mom appreciates it," was all I could come up with as a reply.