Drain Notes

Air had never seemed so thick, objects never seemed so rubbery, but to Scout they were at the moment. She stood in the shower, the water feeling like acid as it bounced off her skin. She let the acid water burn her hoping maybe it would burn off the unwanted thoughts that hung from her, carrying them way down the drain like the drain notes they were.

She wrapped a towel around her torso and slid her feet across the floor as she moved from the bathroom to the sanctuary that was her room. She sighed and pulled out an outfit, forgetting about the one Tiana had laid out for her on her bed. Jordan had seen Scout nude so to her, it didn't matter what she wore, as long as it covered. She tossed on the outfit she took from her closet. When she was somewhat pleased with her appearance she walked down the steps and her cousins face fell.

"Why didn't you wear the outfit I picked out?" she asked with a sad tone, her hands on her hips.

"Cause I don't care what I wear an what you picked out you would thought I was going on some dinner date," she said.

Tiana heard a rumble of thunder from the outside and took a long hard look out the window, " 'sposed to get a storm or something today, so go see Jordan then get back here, it's gonna be bad," she said before looking back at Scout.

Scout grabbed her keys and said goodbye to her cousin before she walked outside into the wind. She pulled her outer shirt into her chest and ran to her car. As she got in, ready to back out, she couldn't help but feel nervous. The entire ride to Jordan's place she felt nervous, not just nervous, more like every emotion bundled up into one package. She didn't understand how it was possible. She was mad cause of what happened. She was happy that he didn't cheat. She was worried that maybe he wanted it. She was sad cause she gave the baby up. Most importantly she was scared, scared of having her heart broken for the third time. She sighed heavily as she parked her car in front of Jordan's place and got out of her car. An old man was fumbling with a box so scout quickly came to help him, he figured she lived there so he let her into the apartment buildings. Scout walked out from the elevator onto the third floor. The hall way was long but in Scouts mind it was the shortest hallway in the world. She was standing in front of Jordan's door in a snap and she stood there for about 5 minutes not sure about her next move.

As if her arm had a mind of it's own, her hand clenched into a fist and she knocked on the door. Moments passed and nobody answered, more moments passed and still no answer. Scouts heart sank just a little as she walked back out to her car. She sat back in her chair and shook her head. With a loud, long, exasperated breath she drove back home. Tiana stood in the window, watching ad Scout made her way to the front door.

wasn't home she should to Tiana.

Tiana noticed something behind scout and her eyes lit up. Scout hadn't noticed that Tiana was starring behind her as she continued to walk up the path slowly and exhausted.

"Scout," she heard a soft voice from behind her say.

Scout slowly turned around, "Jordan," she whispered.

Jordan looked at the girl as he took a step closer, "Scout we need to talk, please," he begged. Scout nodded, unable to take her eyes off the young boy, "I want to start off by saying I'm sorry, I should have known something was up with her I just didn't-"

Scout cut him off, looking at him in amazement and confusion, "why should you be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong," sh said her eyes tearing up, "you didn't sit in a hospital bed and ask for an abortion cause you looked at something in the wrong way," she said crying.

Jordan wiped a tear away, "Scout, what you did wasn't wrong, you did what you felt was right, you knew that we weren't ready, you knew we weren't equipped nor did we have the proper knowledge to take care of a baby," he said in a calm soothing voice.

Scout looked up at him and took a step back, "I killed our baby," she screamed, "you don't know what it's like to sit there for months, knowing that you killed your own child, You didn't have to go through that pain!"

Jordan held the girls head in his hands, "your right scout, I don't know how that feels but I know what it's like to feel alone and for 5 months, that's all I've felt. If I could take the moment I met Josephine back I would. We wouldn't be here, we would be in the house making sure that our child was safe and well fed and healthy. Making sure that the pregnancy was doing fine. But were not Scout, were here, in your front lawn, waiting for you to stop saying sorry. You can't beat yourself up over this, not anymore," he said.

"Why?" scout asked, "why are we here?"

Jordan looked at her, "cause I love you scout, I always have and always will, we had a rough patch but everyone does, we need to get passed it and move on. Tell me scout, tell me you don't love me and I'll leave, I promise you won't ever see me again," he said.

Scout was silent as tears stung her cheeks, she was unable to look at Jordan, unable to speak at all.

Jordan nodded slowly and began to walk away. Scouts head shot up as she shouted Jordan's name. Jordan stopped and turned around, "will it work? Us I mean, do you think he can do it?" she asked.

Jordan walked quickly to her, "of course i do, I think we can make anything work, just please say it," he whispered.

Scout still didn't answer him, Jordan lifted her head up and pressed his lips against Scout softly, Scout kissed him back without hesitation, like it was something she did often. Jordan put his four head against hers and whispered, "please say it," he said.

Scout breathed a fee times before answering, "I love you Jordan, I do, but promise me something," she said.

Jordan nodded, "anything," he said.

"Don't cheat on me, if you do I will personally throw you down a well," she said.

Jordan couldn't help but laugh, "promise," he smiled.

Scout kissed him one more time, "I love you," she said.

Jordan grabbed her hand, "I love you too."