I Will Love You In My Own Way

I am not going to waste my time or yours for that matter, filling the page with the most cliché of descriptions telling you about the love I feel for you. I won’t say that I am walking on clouds or that you are the sunshine in my sky of grey. I am not going to tell you that you take my breath away whenever you turn and look at me because that would be a lie. In no way will I let you believe that you consume my every thought, because you don’t. I don’t want to open up my heart and conform to the ways of love that were decided by all those who have claimed to have loved before. I don’t want to live on other peoples ideas of what love actually is. I want to take that adventure and I want to discover this emotion for myself.

You may ask me if I feel anything for you at all if I do not feel these cliché feelings. Of course I feel for you but I want to find my own words and I want to tell you in my own way about how I feel for you. Saying that; do I even have to tell you, do you even need my words to confirm these feelings? When you hold me and I hold you back, can you not feel it?

On this journey, one in which you have travelled before, will you guide me? Will you take my hand and lead me down the right path towards happiness, protecting me from the troubles along the way. Will you stand with me and not let the hardships tear us apart? Would you repair the damage done by these hardships and only hope it makes our love stronger?

Will you promise to love me in your own way and not in the ways of others? If you promise this to me then I promise the same to you. When I find out what this emotion means to me and when I have discovered a way in which to feel it in my own way I will love you then. Take comfort knowing that I love you now but I am learning and along the way I know I will love you more. Give me that time to discover and appreciate these new feelings and you will not regret that time you waited.

Forgive me now for all the mistakes I may make. Put your trust in me to treasure your love as I will one day trust you to treasure mine. Ignore the opinions of others and erase the hate they may radiate. I am standing here right now for you and you only.

Don’t forget your fears, don’t push them aside in order to keep me safe, embrace them. Don’t try and be perfect because perfection is not what I am after. Hide your feelings if you wish but do not push me aside. Let us learn together. Forget the past experiences. Let them teach you but not affect you. I am your present and I pray to be your future. Leave the past lovers and woes behind and look ahead.

I do not promise that my way of love will match with yours but I do hope each of our ways can push aside the differences and learn to coexist.

Let these ideas contradict each other and let love flow. Let the journey begin and let my own adventure start. Don’t help me discover love but stand by me as I do.

Be my friend. Be my love. Keep me close but don’t suffocate me. Trust to let me breathe and let me find my way. I know that one day you will feel my love and I can only hope it is all you have ever wanted and it was worth the wait.