Save Your Heart

“So what’s the adventure tonight?” I asked getting into his car. I looked over expecting him to answer, but no words came out of his mouth, he was just watching me. His blue-green eyes sparkled. “What? Is there something wrong?”

He gave a chuckle. “No, not even close. You just look so beautiful.”

I looked down knowing I was blushing. “Thank you.” I replied softly. I still wasn’t use to that word being used to describe me. He kissed my temple before starting his car. The sky was beginning to become dark; it was mixed with colors of dark blue, pink, and orange. The June air was warm and breezy. It was a great night. We drove around with our windows down and Third Eye Blind playing quietly in the background. The car stopped at an ice cream parlor just outside of town. Derek ordered himself a cookies and cream ice cream cone and cookie dough cone for me.

“You know my favorite ice cream?” I whispered.

He winked at me and flashed a smile. “Of course.” He said it as if I was silly to ask such a question.

After we got our ice cream, Derek drove to a little beach nearby and we laid on top of his car eating our ice cream together. The stars were just beginning to shine through the night sky. I never believed in these corny romantic dates, but there was something about this that I didn’t mind. I actually really liked it. It took a lot to not start giggling the entire time.

“Do you want to talk a walk?” He asked when we finished our ice cream. I nodded with a smile. We hopped off the hood of his car and walked along the shoreline together, side by side. I clutched Derek’s hand in mine, a smile spread across his face instantly. I looked down and smiled as well. The thought that I made someone smile like that still made me happy and boggled my mind at the same time. “What are you thinking about?” He broke the few minutes of silence.

“You really want to know?”

“Yes, of course.”

“I still can’t believe this or us, I should say.”

Derek chuckled. “Why?”

I shrugged. “I never thought I could deserve to have someone like you to walk on the beach with, to hold hands with, to spend time with.”

He stopped in his tracks and spun me around to face him. “Someone like me?”

I shrugged again. “I don’t know.” I replied nervously. “You’re a really great guy, Derek. You make me so happy. I don’t know what I did to deserve that.”

He bursted out laughing. “Are you kidding me, Rylin? I ask myself that question everyday.”

I looked up at him. He was looking down at me smiling. The moon was at a perfectly angle and made his eyes sparkle. “What do you mean?”

“I always wonder how I got so lucky to have met a girl as beautiful, sweet, and wonderful as you.” He held onto both of my hands tight, smoothing his thumb over my knuckles.

“How can you say that? We haven’t even know each other for that long.”

“I know. I know it sounds crazy, but I really mean what I say, every word.”

“I want to be honest with you.”

I could see him swallow hard. He was nervous. His hands let go of mine and wrapped themselves around my waist. “Okay.” There was a definite edginess to his voice.

“I’m scared.” My heart started to pick up its pace. I bit my lip. “It all feels like it’s going so fast. The last time I told someone I loved them, it didn’t end well.” I felt like I should stop the words from coming out of my mouth, but I couldn’t. The words couldn’t stay in any longer. “I just don’t want to end up hurt. I don’t want things to end up bad between us. I’m so afraid.”

My heart was beating a million miles per minute. I felt the need to cry until I felt Derek’s arms wrap around me tighter and pull me closer to him. I rested my head on his chest, his heart was beating fast too. I grasped him tightly. The sound of his heart and the feel of him holding me made me feel safe and secure, more secure than I’ve ever felt. “You’re safe with me.” He whispered in my ear. I pulled myself away from him. He looked down at me and pressed his forehead against mine. I put my hands on each side of his face and brought it closer to mine. Our lips crashed together like the waves behind us. This kiss wasn’t like our previous ones, it was aggressive and passionate. Maybe things were moving fast, but I wasn’t scared anymore. All it took was those four words from Derek to assure me that everything would be okay. Our tongues danced around in each other mouths. My hands moved down to his neck and his rested on my hips. He didn’t make any sly movements to get me to sleep with him or to even get his hands up my shirt, he just kissed me.

I couldn’t help but smile, a smile so big it interrupted our kiss. Derek let out a tiny giggle. “Are you okay?” He asked, his breathing was heavy.

“Mhm.” I replied barely. I bit his lip lightly before kissing him again. He gripped my waist tightly. This time we both interrupted the kiss with our smiles. “I love you.” I said suddenly. I didn’t believe those words came out of my mouth, but they did and I was glad. Derek deserved to hear them. I know he would appreciate them. I know he won’t take them for granted. I needed to say them, because I have always loved him. I couldn’t lie to him any longer. He grinned and gave me kisses from my forehead trailing down to my mouth.

His forehead was on mine. “Will you be my girl?”

I giggled, probably more than I should have. I nodded unable to get any words out of my mouth. He enveloped his arms around my waist and lifted me up. My face was aligned with his. He gave me a quick on my lips, then placed me back on the sand. “You’re so adorable.”

I did a small curtsy and said, “I know I am.” He chuckled and took a hold of my hand. We walked down the rest of the beach hand in hand until our legs got tired. We talked about everything from our favorite things to how excited we were to do all sorts of things together as a couple. A couple. I was someone’s girlfriend. There was someone who called themselves my boyfriend. Someone loved me enough to call me theirs. It was such a hard concept for me to grasp, but I was getting there, with Derek by my side.

Derek and I spent every moment together, whether it was going out to dinner or lounging on the couch and watching a movie. Every night, we would switch apartments, one day we would go to his, the next we would go to mine. We never spent the night, we weren’t ready for that. We were taking our relationship slow, nice and slow. Things were really good. I don’t even remember the last time I was this happy. Every time Derek walked into a room with an adorable smile on his face, I would feel butterflies flying around in my stomach. We made each other laugh every single day. We had ‘perfect relationship’ written all over us. We were the couple that made everyone jealous. We were everything that I have wanted for so long.