Save Your Heart

“Rylin! Are you coming?” I heard Tyler yell from downstairs.

I stared at myself in my mirror; I had a little black dress on and my hair was up in a messy bun, I had bags under my eyes, I was exhausted. I was working two jobs everyday just to make our rent. A year before I graduated college, Tyler and I got back together. He seemed to be a different person than before. He made me smile and laugh. He told me things would be different. All the feelings I had for him in high school came rushing back with every minute I spent with him. Slowly, my mind took a break from Derek. Derek and I lost contact after the break-up. He became busy with his band and touring and I was working hard on finishing college. After I graduated college, Tyler and I bought a house together. At first, Tyler was supporting us working as a mechanic, we were doing really well. I was able to get a job as a photographer at a music magazine. Things were doing well for the first time in 3 years. Then everything came crashing down, Tyler started going to parties every weekend, drinking and doing who knows what else. He started going to more and more parties, he eventually started going to them 3 or 4 times a week. Eventually, he got fired from his job and I had to pick up a waitressing job on the side of my photography job. I found myself slowly slipping into the sadness and empty feelings I had when I broke up with Derek. I started thinking about him and missing him a lot more. The more I worked, the less I would think about everything that would make me upset. I worked all I could to keep myself busy and to keep up with the bills. I wasn’t happy, but I was living.

“Rylin! Let’s go! I’m not waiting around all day for you.”

I scoffed. “Alright, Tyler! Hold on.” I stretched my eyes to see if I could make myself look less tired. When I let go, they just went back to looking sleepy again. I sighed, I wasn’t going to make myself look any better, especially if Tyler was going to continue yelling at me. I shook at head at myself and quickly walked into the living room.

“It’s about time.” Tyler said. He flashed me an aggravated look before walking out the door. I had to speed walk to keep up with him as we walked to his car.

“Are you mad at me?” I asked softly when we got into the car.

Tyler shook his head at me. “Well, it’s YOUR friend’s party tonight. I don’t even want to go to this thing and you’re just taking your sweet little time caring about yourself.”

I looked down ashamed. I started fidgeting with my fingers. “I’m sorry.”

“Whatever.” He replied.

We were on our way to Natalie and Brooks’s engagement party. I was excited to go and see my old friends, the ones I lost touch with when everything ended with Derek. One of the many good things that happened to me when I was with him was I met a lot of new people and made more friends than I ever have. There were so many things I miss about that relationship. Now I felt more alone than ever.

Tyler was speeding and running through every red light he could. I cringed with every car we came remotely close to. I hated when Tyler was mad, he changed into a completely different person, an aggressive person. I gazed through the window without a word not wanting to make Tyler even angrier.

“Rylin!!” Natalie yelled running towards me. I hadn’t even gotten out of the car yet when she saw me. Brooks was standing in the background watching her with a smile on his face. I gave him a small wave before getting trampled by Natalie. He grinned at me in return. “I missed you! I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Nat, we saw each other last weekend.” I replied. She still had her arms around me.

“I don’t care. it’s not enough.” She finally let go of me and looked at me up and down. She leaned in towards my ear and whispered, “Are you okay?”

I waved my hand at her playing it off. “I’m just tired.” I noticed Brooks walking towards us and I smiled at him again. “Brooks! How are you?”

“I’m fantastic. Yourself?” He answered. I saw him loop his hand with Natalie’s. She glanced at him and flashed him a huge grin. I couldn’t help but beam at them.

“I’m good.” I flashed them a smiling hoping I would hide the fact I was telling a gigantic. Smiles could hide everything inside.

“I’m just going to go inside.” Tyler retorted suddenly, annoyed.

We didn’t answer him as we watched him walk into the building. There were a ton of cars around. After catching up, we walked into the building together. When everyone saw Natalie and Brooks hand in hand, they clapped and cheered. The room was decorated in pink and silver. The place was crowded with all of Natalie and Brooks’s friends and family. I looked around and spotted Tyler sitting in the back. I made my way towards him. An unexpected hand caught my arm and spun me around, it was Jake. “Jake!” I squealed and jumped into his arms.

“Ry! How are you?” He chimed back. He was wearing a black dress shirt and a pair of jeans.

“I’m doing okay. How are you?”

“I’m great!”

A girl with long brunette hair, piercing blue eyes, and a sleeve of tattoos appeared next to him. She was beautiful. She wrapped her arm around his and smiled at me. “I’m Jess.” She held out her free hand.

I smiled at her as we shook hands.“I’m Rylin.”

“Oh Ry!” There was a sudden glow in Jake’s eyes.“This is my girl, Jess. Babe, this is an old friend, Rylin.”

Jess looked up at Jake attentively. “Is this Derek’s Rylin?” She whispered. Jake bit his lip and nodded his head swiftly in hopes that I wouldn’t noticed, I did unfortunately. I immediately began to scan the room for Derek’s face.

“He’s sitting across the room with us.” Jake must have noticed me looking for him. I stopped glancing around the room and looked down. Derek probably didn’t want to see me after what I did to him. I didn’t even think I could handle seeing him after all of this time. “He was looking for you, too, you know.”

My heart jumped into my throat when I heard Jake tell me that.“Really?”

Jake nodded and gave me a sympathetic smile. Jess grabbed my arm and squealed, “You should come sit with us!”

I shook my head abruptly. “No, I can’t. My...uh...I’m sitting with someone.”

Disappointment showed on both of their faces. I took one more glance over their shoulders in hopes I would see him. I had no luck; there were a lot of people walking around.

“Well, you’re more than welcome to come over if you change your mind.” Jess stated hopefully.

I smiled at her. “I might.”

We heard Brooks’s voice booming through the speakers telling us to take our seats. Jess, Jake, and I said our goodbyes and went our separate ways. I found Tyler sitting at a table in the corner surround by a few other people. He was already chowing down on a heaping plate of food. I looked around at everyone else, no one had plates of food in front of them. I started to tell him he was rude to grab his food before others did, but I didn’t want to aggravate him more than he already was. I took an empty seat next to him and turned my attention towards Brooks who was standing in front of the room with a gleaming and beautiful Natalie by his side. We caught each other’s eyes and blew each other a kiss.

Brooks was standing in front of a table, with a microphone in one hand and Natalie on his other waiting for his guests to settle down. After a few short minutes, the room fell silent, all eyes were on Brooks. He bought the microphone closer to his lips and spoke, “Thank you everyone for coming and celebrating this huge and special moment in mine and my beautiful bride to be’s life.” A simultaneous “aww” swept around the room. “We greatly appreciate it. You all mean a lot to us and we feel blessed to have you here...” I looked over at Natalie; she was staring at Brooks as he made his speech, her face was radiant, her arms tied around her fiance’s waist. I glanced over on the other side of Brooks to see who else was joining them at the table; there he was looking up at Brooks. I felt knots in my stomach. He had a serious look on his face as he was listening intently. He was wearing a black dress shirt and a red tie, his hair was shoulder length and straightened. He looked even more handsome than when I saw him years ago. I couldn’t help but stare at him. It felt so good to be in the same room with him again. It took great force to not jump out of my seat and run into his arms. He eyes left Brooks and turned his attention to his lap, then quickly to me. He must have caught a glimpse at me. When our eyes met, it felt as if a lightening bolt went through my body. We smiled at each other at the same time. For those few moments we gazed at each other, it was as if nothing changed, nothing went wrong; I was his and he was mine. There was no one else in the room but each other.

“Once again, thank you so much and enjoy your food!” Brooks’s voice interrupted our gaze. I quickly turned my eyes to him and Natalie. They gave each other and quick peck, everyone clapped for them. When they sat down, the guests started getting out of their seats and making their way to the buffet table.

“I’m getting more food.” Tyler announced with a mouthful of food. I didn’t bother answering him, I just gave him a look of disgust as he walked away from the table. I glanced over to the table where Brooks, Natalie, Jake, Jess, and Derek were seated; it was empty. I frowned; I missed his face already.