Safari Night

In a far away land, in which therein lies a far away town, wherein a far away bar is located; three couples sat inside a booth basking in the glory of martinis, beers and more martinis. Nobody knew who had enforced this triple-dating shit, but they all sucked it up and attended the friendly meeting.

“Kisame, stop staring at Za like that.”

“I wasn’t sta-”

“I don’t blame you. She really is a doted girl.”

“Chuey!”

“Chan is right, sis. You do have some boobs going on there.”

The redhead blushed and looked away. “You’re both meanies!”

“Don’t complain, woman! At least you have boobs.”

Chan huffed and leaned back, arching a brow while saying, “I bet Tobi loooves them, Lee. Don’t you, Tobi?”

“Tobi’s a good boy and loves Lee-san’s boobs!”

“Tobi!” Lee hissed and lightly prodded his ribs with her right elbow, causing the masked boy to groan.

The youngest girl howled with laughter, enjoying the embarrassed look Lee shot her. Kiba, meanwhile, was too occupied giving Moxie sideway glances. He was a very territorial man, Chan knew. God, was she going to have a fieldtrip with this.

“So, Za, I heard that you’re not a virgin anymore.” The girl leaned forward, an owlish look plastered on her face. “I want details. Now.”

“Don’t answer that, Lar.”

“Oh my god! Chuey!”

Lee straightened and leaned into the table, glancing from Chan to Za and Za to Chan. “What is this? I thought I was going to be your first, sis.” Her face fell and she tried to fight back a grin. “We still need to do that threesome, by the way.”

Kiba was absolutely livid at this. “Lar is not going to sleep with any of you!” He then proceeded to wrap a secure hand around her waist, and pull her right up against him. The boy was snarling, for crying out loud. Though, Za was too preoccupied with blushing and looking away. Chan wondered if she even knew just how damn obvious Kiba was groping her left boob.

“I’m going to kidnap her,” Lee assured, grumbling like a child that had been denied dessert. “And I’ll tie her up and… and…”

“Can Tobi join in?”

Lee seemed to think about this. She finally shrugged and say, “sure, why not? Wanna join, Chan?”

Chan eagerly opened her mouth to answer, only to feel a large hand wrap around her lips. “No. She’ll be busy.” Oh, Kisame, always the party-pooper. The young girl started to mumble into his hand, gently prodding the skin with her tongue, and saying a satisfactory ‘ha!’ when he let go. She was blushing, though.

An awkward silence ensued, and Chan decided to ask something before things got worse. “Lee, I never thought you’d be into young kids.” She smirked and tried to bite back a giggle. The older girl raised both brows and gave her a sly smile.

“Says the girl with a man double her age.”

“Kisame isn’t that old! He’s just more experienced.”

At this, she clutched the older man and glared at Lee, before snuggling into her well-toned chest. That’s when she heard some sucking and sighs from her left. She looked up and panicked.

“Za! Please! My eyes!”

They both flipped her off. Simultaneously. She was mildly surprised. Za didn’t look like the type to go and flip off people. But hey, there she was, tugging and nipping and-

“Not you, too, Lee!” Tobi and Lee were both trying to get under the table. “What are you even doing?”

Lee poked her head over the edge, pushing aside a martini before answering eloquently. “Well, nobody but me can see Tobi’s face. And since I know you’re going to-”

“Oh my god! That’s not fair! I want to see.” Chan started to slump in her seat and to get under the table. She accidentally kneed a solid object, and noticed with shame that it was Tobi’s mask. There was a grunt and then the whole table jolted sideways once Tobi spooked. Chan tried crawling back up into her seat, only to shamelessly grab Kisame’s thigh along the way, feeling the godly sculpted-

“Chuey!”

She was screaming her name a lot lately, she noticed. “Whaaat?” She finally seated herself correctly, her hair a jungle mess framing her round face. She glanced at Za and noticed that Kiba was glowering dangerously at the table. Oh, he spilled his beer. Chan felt laughter rise in her throat, but felt it die once Za quickly grabbed a napkin and started to press it against his pants. Dear god, did she even notice how Kiba was looking at her?

“Za, look at him, he’s on cloud nine!”

The girl looked up and frowned. “Huh?”

“Your hand… his pants… Oh, forget it. Lee gets it, right Lee- Aw shit. Where the fuck did they go?”

Za stared hard at Chan. “Wha? No. Now you explain.”

“But… that’s…”

“Chuey.”

The girl scowled and leaned back, raking her hand through her wild hair. “Well, you’re touching his… his… area with your hand and that’s… please tell me you got the idea.”

Kiba was staring hard at Chan. Why the fuck does she has to comment on things in the most inopportune moment? “Well, Kiba isn’t like that.” She pouted at the younger girl.

“Za, he’s a man. Of course he’s-”

“Are you… are you questioning me?”

Chan backed off quickly, grabbing Kisame’s arm for safety. “No. No, of course Kiba is different. He’s incredible. I love him.” She shrunk in her seat. “Don’teatme.”

“I thought so.”

Chan looked to her right, trying to distract herself. “Oh, look. Here comes the pedophile and her pet.” She gave the approaching couple a sly smile. Lee’s lipstick was smeared. Oh, burn. “Had a nice make-out session? I heard that Lee likes to be dominated. Did you tie her up, Tobi?” She gave Tobi a knowing look.

“No! Lee-chan only likes that during the ni-”

“Heeey, Sis. Did I tell you that you smell nice tonight?” Always the smooth talker.

Za looked around at Lee. “Huh?” she pouted thoughtfully and then smiled. “Oh! Um. No? Thank you.” She smiled again, glancing from Lee to Chan and back again. “Is everything okay?”

Chan chuckled and leaned on Kisame’s arm. “Of course, Za. You may return smooching up Kiba.” She glanced at Lee, smiled knowingly, and looked down at her drink. The ice had long gone melted.

After making out with their respectful couple. The six of them occupied themselves with small-talk, joking about past experiences. And before they knew it, the drinks were rolling, and everyone started to slowly loose themselves into the delicious apple martinis.

5 drinks later

“Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, with yellow feathers on her… her… cut down legs. I don’t remember. Fuck.”

7 drinks later

“Lee, goddamn it. Don’t you understand? Dusters are the sole reason we exist in this clean era.”

“Jesus, what are you one about Chan?”

“I don’t… I don’t remember.”

8 drinks later

“Dancing with myse-elf!”

“I want to glomp you. Oh my god.”

10 drinks later

“Sis, can I… I… stuff my face between your boobs and make motorboat noises?”

“Huh?”

“Brr. Brr. Brr.”

15 drinks later

“We have human fucking beings crawling out of us.”

17 drinks later

“Where are my pants, woman?”

20 drinks later

“No! I fucking dictate this table! Fuck your booth country. We’re on a fucking war.”

22 drinks later

“Kisame, thank you for dropping us off.” Kiba smiled and held onto a droopy Za, who kept yawning now and then, mumbling how the martini cups had the right to vote. Kisame just shrugged.

“Hope it’s not a bother to leave both Tobi and Lee here, too.” Lee, instead was on the grass, on top of Tobi, staring at the sky and voicing just how tiny she felt and ohmygod the wind is going to take her to Alice.

Chan was clutching to Kisame, staring at a distant horizon. “No. No. Beer can’t vote. Martinis… and tequila.” She panicked. “We didn’t take tequila in consideration.”

“They can vote, too.” Kisame reassured her. Chan just frowned and looked away.

“Yeah, well. Fuck rabbits.”