Status: In Progress
You're Beautiful to Me
Bulletproof Heart.
“It’s just another cup of tea with Clayah, Sean,” I tried to tell myself. But this time I knew it was different. Because I knew what I wanted.
Okay that sounds quite creepy. What I meant: I was tired of Desiree believing I could be her toy just based on my life before. What I did know was I was clearly having feelings for Clayah. And, I hoped, she might have feelings for me.
So this to me was more than just another invite for a cuppa. I wanted to tell her the truth. How I felt. And though I was scared shitless I was going to do it.
I sat in yet another tea shop, in yet another city. The show wasn’t starting for a couple hours… so where was Clayah? Sound check had ended an half an hour ago and when I saw her she said she’d wouldn’t be a minute, she’d meet me here.
So where was she?
Occupied with fans, I bet. Or Jayce. Or press. Or her bandmates. Or Molly. Or something.
So I waited at a little table by the window and drummed my fingers, checking my phone every other minute. After thirty-five minutes of waiting my phone rang. Not even checking, sure it must be Clayah, I answered.
“Hey,” I said. Did my voice just shake a little? “Where are you?”
“That’s the question, isn’t it, Mr. Callaghan?”
A chill went up my spine. I knew that voice, and it wasn’t Clayah, that was damn sure. I clenched my jaw, growling, “How did you get this number?”
“Irrelevant,” he said, his voice as arrogant as usual. “The point is we know where you are.”
I tried to swallow, only to find my mouth had gone dry. “Desiree got to you, didn’t she?”
“How we found you is… beside the point,” he said. “We warned you, Sean. You can avoid the cameras all you want, but we will always find you.”
I laughed, genuinely amused. “Took you long enough, you lying arse, you haven’t gotten close to finding me for years.”
I heard him sniff. “We’re trying to help you.” He’d avoided my legitimate point. “If we know where you are then someone else does, too.”
My blood ran cold. Whether I liked it or not, I knew he was right, but I didn’t make that clear to him. “If you’re so sure where I am why aren’t you here?”
“You know how dangerous that would be.”
“So why call? To try and scare me? It’s not working,” I lied.
“I called to make a request.”
“Request denied.”
“You don’t even know it yet, Mr. Callaghan.”
“You’re going to ask me to come back. The answer is no. I thought I made it very clear I wanted nothing to do with any of it by, well, leaving? Or are you still so thick that that didn’t register with you?”
“I am indeed requesting that you return,” he said, ducking the insult, “but only for your safety.”
“Because it’s so safe there,” I said venomously.
“Safer than where you are. At least here we can protect you—”
“Because you did that so well before.”
“—where as out there you’re exposed.” He paused. “They will find you, Sean. You know that.”
“The bloody hell they will.”
“They will. And they’re not going to be nice. They think you must still know something. They never believed the stories for one moment, even though the public did.”
“Well they were pretty weak stories. I was ready to bust them all just to irritate you,” I chuckled. I didn’t give a flying fuck. I was sick of those fakers, those liars, those pricks.
“They want it all, Sean.”
“Let them have it. I don’t want it. They can have my share.”
“That’s not funny.”
“Sure it is!”
“They will hurt you, Mr. Callaghan. Maybe kill you.” I stayed quiet. “Come back. Avoid it all. Just go back to the way it used to be. End this silly game.”
Now I was angry. “It was never a game.” I could breathe fire now; that was just too far.
“But you still don’t want to die, Mr. Callaghan.”
“So I won’t.”
“Enough. This is the only time we’re going to ask.” He waited. I didn’t answer. “Think of your mother, Mr. Callaghan.”
“Don’t you dare bring Mum into this.” Hot tears of anger were building up now. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
“Do you think she wants you dead?”
“I know full well she doesn’t want me to end up like her.”
“All we want is your safety, Mr. Callaghan.”
“Then stop risking it. Never call this number again.”
I was about to hang up when he said, “Wait.”
“What more could you possibly have to say? Don’t you need to save your words to go lie to the public?”
“If you won’t think of the grand scheme of things and if you won’t think of your family,” he spoke slowly, “think of Ms. Shier.”
He had what he wanted now: my horrified attention. “You wouldn’t dare touch her.”
“Oh, we would never. But they would.”
And I knew he was right.
“If you want to risk her, be my guest and stay where you are. Though you may not care about yourself, if you care about her, you’ll come back.” And he hung up.
I set my phone on the table and pressed my palms flat, trying to stop them from shaking. He was lying, wasn’t he? There’s no way they could know where I was. Not after all this time. After all the time I’d spent hiding from them they couldn’t possibly have found me now. I’d worked so hard.
This was not happening.
“Sorry I’m late.” I jumped in my seat. Clayah. She’d just walked in and was slipping off her jacket now, sitting down in the chair across from me. “Mikey needed me for a bit. You didn’t have to wait for me, you should’ve gotten something—oh my God are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
In that split second I decided: I wasn’t going to tell her a thing. Not about home, not about how I felt. Because I did care. And I wanted Clayah safe. So she just had to be my friend.
“No,” I said. “I’m good. You gave me a bit of a fright, though.”
“Sorry. Still you look a bit—”
“Thirsty? Yeah, I am. I’ll go order. What sort of tea do you want?”
The look in her eyes told me she didn’t believe me. I just hope my eyes didn’t say I was lying.
Okay that sounds quite creepy. What I meant: I was tired of Desiree believing I could be her toy just based on my life before. What I did know was I was clearly having feelings for Clayah. And, I hoped, she might have feelings for me.
So this to me was more than just another invite for a cuppa. I wanted to tell her the truth. How I felt. And though I was scared shitless I was going to do it.
I sat in yet another tea shop, in yet another city. The show wasn’t starting for a couple hours… so where was Clayah? Sound check had ended an half an hour ago and when I saw her she said she’d wouldn’t be a minute, she’d meet me here.
So where was she?
Occupied with fans, I bet. Or Jayce. Or press. Or her bandmates. Or Molly. Or something.
So I waited at a little table by the window and drummed my fingers, checking my phone every other minute. After thirty-five minutes of waiting my phone rang. Not even checking, sure it must be Clayah, I answered.
“Hey,” I said. Did my voice just shake a little? “Where are you?”
“That’s the question, isn’t it, Mr. Callaghan?”
A chill went up my spine. I knew that voice, and it wasn’t Clayah, that was damn sure. I clenched my jaw, growling, “How did you get this number?”
“Irrelevant,” he said, his voice as arrogant as usual. “The point is we know where you are.”
I tried to swallow, only to find my mouth had gone dry. “Desiree got to you, didn’t she?”
“How we found you is… beside the point,” he said. “We warned you, Sean. You can avoid the cameras all you want, but we will always find you.”
I laughed, genuinely amused. “Took you long enough, you lying arse, you haven’t gotten close to finding me for years.”
I heard him sniff. “We’re trying to help you.” He’d avoided my legitimate point. “If we know where you are then someone else does, too.”
My blood ran cold. Whether I liked it or not, I knew he was right, but I didn’t make that clear to him. “If you’re so sure where I am why aren’t you here?”
“You know how dangerous that would be.”
“So why call? To try and scare me? It’s not working,” I lied.
“I called to make a request.”
“Request denied.”
“You don’t even know it yet, Mr. Callaghan.”
“You’re going to ask me to come back. The answer is no. I thought I made it very clear I wanted nothing to do with any of it by, well, leaving? Or are you still so thick that that didn’t register with you?”
“I am indeed requesting that you return,” he said, ducking the insult, “but only for your safety.”
“Because it’s so safe there,” I said venomously.
“Safer than where you are. At least here we can protect you—”
“Because you did that so well before.”
“—where as out there you’re exposed.” He paused. “They will find you, Sean. You know that.”
“The bloody hell they will.”
“They will. And they’re not going to be nice. They think you must still know something. They never believed the stories for one moment, even though the public did.”
“Well they were pretty weak stories. I was ready to bust them all just to irritate you,” I chuckled. I didn’t give a flying fuck. I was sick of those fakers, those liars, those pricks.
“They want it all, Sean.”
“Let them have it. I don’t want it. They can have my share.”
“That’s not funny.”
“Sure it is!”
“They will hurt you, Mr. Callaghan. Maybe kill you.” I stayed quiet. “Come back. Avoid it all. Just go back to the way it used to be. End this silly game.”
Now I was angry. “It was never a game.” I could breathe fire now; that was just too far.
“But you still don’t want to die, Mr. Callaghan.”
“So I won’t.”
“Enough. This is the only time we’re going to ask.” He waited. I didn’t answer. “Think of your mother, Mr. Callaghan.”
“Don’t you dare bring Mum into this.” Hot tears of anger were building up now. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
“Do you think she wants you dead?”
“I know full well she doesn’t want me to end up like her.”
“All we want is your safety, Mr. Callaghan.”
“Then stop risking it. Never call this number again.”
I was about to hang up when he said, “Wait.”
“What more could you possibly have to say? Don’t you need to save your words to go lie to the public?”
“If you won’t think of the grand scheme of things and if you won’t think of your family,” he spoke slowly, “think of Ms. Shier.”
He had what he wanted now: my horrified attention. “You wouldn’t dare touch her.”
“Oh, we would never. But they would.”
And I knew he was right.
“If you want to risk her, be my guest and stay where you are. Though you may not care about yourself, if you care about her, you’ll come back.” And he hung up.
I set my phone on the table and pressed my palms flat, trying to stop them from shaking. He was lying, wasn’t he? There’s no way they could know where I was. Not after all this time. After all the time I’d spent hiding from them they couldn’t possibly have found me now. I’d worked so hard.
This was not happening.
“Sorry I’m late.” I jumped in my seat. Clayah. She’d just walked in and was slipping off her jacket now, sitting down in the chair across from me. “Mikey needed me for a bit. You didn’t have to wait for me, you should’ve gotten something—oh my God are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
In that split second I decided: I wasn’t going to tell her a thing. Not about home, not about how I felt. Because I did care. And I wanted Clayah safe. So she just had to be my friend.
“No,” I said. “I’m good. You gave me a bit of a fright, though.”
“Sorry. Still you look a bit—”
“Thirsty? Yeah, I am. I’ll go order. What sort of tea do you want?”
The look in her eyes told me she didn’t believe me. I just hope my eyes didn’t say I was lying.
♠ ♠ ♠
Oohhh have fun mulling this one over, guys ;Dmwahaha....