I Know You've Got Your Life In Place But I've Yet To Take The Hint

Jack's POV

It figures that the one time I’d give in and take the short cut through the back alley connecting Alex’s house to the busy main street behind, the lights would be burnt. A chill lingered in the air from the storm that had only finished a few hours ago.

Alex and I had holed up in the tree house until the lightening and rain had slowed down enough for us to make out the way back to the house. Once we’d gotten inside, the storm had kicked up again, lasting through a good part of the day as well. We’d stayed up as long as we humanely could, and then we’d fallen asleep together in a tangled heap on the floor, of all places.

We’d been woken up maybe an hour before, by his mom. If she’d been surprised or displeased with seeing me, she’d kept it to herself. She’d simply asked, politely, of course, if I could leave for a while so that Alex could spend some time with family that was leaving early in the morning.

I’d said fine, and decided that I was going to go see Rian and Zack. They’d texted me earlier saying that they were at Zack’s, so that’s where I was headed now.

The alley was about 2 miles long and no one knew exactly why it’d been built, but it cut out a good 20 minutes from the otherwise half an hour walk I’d have to take. (Yes, I’m lazy). It just happened to be dark and deserted tonight, with nothing but the moonlight for guidance, and the glow from the windows of shops that’d been locked up tight for almost an hour now.

I started humming as I walked. Life was so good right now.

That’s about the time she walked away from me, nobody likes you when you’re 23, and are still more amused by TV shows, what the hell is ADD, my friends say I should act my age, what’s my age again, what’s my age again?.

Blink is amazing, no joke. I was busy dancing and reminiscing about the first time I’d saw them live (with Alex, of course) and failed to notice the pothole in the pavement until the pavement was cushioning my face.

Cursing, I felt around for my iPod as I pulled myself to my knees.

“Bloody hell,” I muttered after encountering nothing but rocks for 5 minutes. My hands were scraped and bloody, so I pulled myself to my feet. I’d just buy another damned iPod.

I brushed the rocks and dirt off of my knees and looked up. A soft glow drew my eyes to the left of me.

A silhouette stood there, barley noticeable because it blended in with the shadow of the building. The only reason I knew that it was a person was because of the light of my iPod in their hands.

I walked towards the person, a faint strain of nerves tugging on my heart. Nothing like walking up to a stranger in a deserted alley at 10 at night, I thought wryly. I watch too many horror movies.

“Hey man, you found my iPod, I was just looking for that,” I said, keeping my tone as friendly as possible. “Do you think I could have it back and be on my way?”

The shape moved towards me, into the moonlight. The light revealed a man a little bit older than me, maybe 30 if I had to guess. He was well dressed and clean shaven. Not a bad looking guy for an older fellow, and most definitely not the type of person who was going to start a fight in an alleyway over a 3 year old iPod. I watched as his hands traced the back of my iPod, and then finally, he met my gaze. I almost flinched when his eyes connected with mine – I don’t think I’d ever seen eyes quite that shade of blue. Like ice, almost. Except … colder.

“Seems like I came to your rescue, eh, Jack?” the man asked, his voice low and rough, and then he chuckled, a low raspy chuckle that sent shivers up and down my spine. It was not the voice I was expecting from the polished man. The fact that he knew my name had me on high alert.

“H-how’d you know my name?” I asked, nerves showing through more than I’d intended.

The man smiled. His smile was the total opposite of his eyes and voice. It was warm, alive, and friendly. Maybe I was overreacting.

“There’s a name engraved on the back of the iPod. I just took a chance that it’d be yours.”

I felt like an idiot after he admitted that, because it was true. I had gotten my name engraved on the back of my iPod after Zack came back with the same one one day after tour.

The man took a few steps closer. “You don’t mind that I know your name, do you, Jack? I was hoping we could be … friends.”

I instinctively took a step back and my back was met with the cold bricks of the wall behind me. I pressed my fingers against the wall in an effort to keep calm.

He stepped forward again. This time, his hand reached out and he traced one finger down my cheek. Goosebumps rose along my flesh and I heavily resisted the urge to vomit.

“You’re pretty cute, for a kid.” He made a big deal of looking me up and down. “How old are you, 20, 21?”

Through gritted teeth and curled fists, I muttered, “23.”

He smiled and ran his finger down my chest. It stopped over the face of Mark Hoppus. He prodded my chest with his finger.

“Why don’t you and I go somewhere a little more private? I’d like to explore in a bit more privacy, if you understand.” His voice was leery and suggestive and my stomach instantly turned cold. I wanted to scream and run but I knew that I’d be signing my own death warrant if I did that, because I wouldn’t make it more than 5 feet without tripping in another hole, and screaming would just be a waste of air because no one could here me out here.

I decided instead to play along. Licking my lips and trying to look interested, I looked him up and down. “What do you want to explore?”

He smiled. “Whatever you’d like me to explore.”

He leaned closer and I could feel the heat of his body, along with the liquor on his breath. This both revolted me and gave me some hope. If he was just a stupid drunk, I had a better chance of getting out of this sooner.

I could feel his breath on my neck and his hands on my hips. I tried to stay perfectly still, not wanting to encourage him, but at the same time, not wanting to be so resistant that he decided I wasn’t useful and bashed my brains out.

He leaned even closer. “Playing hard to get, are we?” he asked, his tongue flicking out to lick at my lips. He laughed at the way my hands dug into my side. “Admit it, you’re getting turned on.”

I opened my mouth to answer and was instead silenced by his lips slamming down onto mine.

He poked and prodded and sucked and licked, his hands roaming over my body. Despite my refusal to kiss back, despite having glued my hands to my jeans, the one traitorous part of my body that I couldn’t control decided it was going to react.

He felt how hard I was against him and moaned and pressed up even harder against me. “I wondered if you were made of steel – now I know the answer. Part of you is.” He laughed at his own joke and started sucking on my neck. My eyes rolled back – he’d found my fucking spot. Asshole.

“I – I have a boyfriend, you know,” I stammered. “I won’t do this.”

“You’re already doing this,” he said, and rubbed his hand over my erection.

“It’s rape. I don’t want this. I love Alex. I wouldn’t do this to him, I would NEVER HURT HIM.”

The man let go of me suddenly and I dropped to the ground, throbbing everywhere. The mans eyes were wild, and he looked more like a murderous maniac then a man scorned.

“You leave me no choice, Barakat. I was hoping we could do this the easy way, but you have to be a loyal bitch. You’re all useless.”

His words, the use of my last name, and his eyes stirred up a panic in me and I jumped to my feet with the intention to bolt.

I was met by a cold hand and an even colder blade.

“Going somewhere?” the man asked. His face had lost all his charm, his voice had lost all its warmth, and his eyes were pure gray.

The eyes were the last thing I remembered as everything was painted black.

Alex’s POV

“Are you really happy, Alexander Tell us how happy you are.”

The annoying question, the same question I’d been hearing for the past 20 minutes (except this one was actually direct) came from my grandmother. She was the most direct person I know, there was no sugarcoating her words. Somehow, she’d been quiet up until now. Too bad good things couldn’t last forever.

“Yes, Grandma.” I drew out the words slowly, as if she was an old biddy, because I knew it would annoy her to the max. “I love Jack and he loves me. What else does it take to convince you that I’m happy? Do I have to write it on the walls? Do I have to scream it to the wind? Do I have to propose to him at the next Raven’s game for the world to see? Maybe I’ll write him a song. Maybe I’ll buy him a palace. It doesn’t matter, it doesn’t fucking matter what I do or what I don’t do. I love Jack Bassam Barakat, and he knows it. If the rest of you are too fucking stupid, then … suck it.”

There were gasps around the room, and many of my relatives tsk-tsked and tut-tutted.

My mom looked at me like I’d suddenly grown another head. “Alexander William Gaskarth, you apologize to your grandmother right this instant!”

I opened my mouth to say that I would do no such thing when the lady in question cut in.

“Oh Isobel, quit your fussing. The boy’s just expressed his true feelings; there isn’t a thing wrong with that at all.” She held her head high as if she was the queen. She looked at each and every one of us before her eyes landed on me.

“Now see here, Alex. When I was a young woman, I fell in love with a man. A man, who I’m sad to say, isn’t your grandfather. Would you like to know why he isn’t your grandfather, Alex?”

I didn’t see any other option than to nod.

“Because, Alex, I was weak willed and stupid.” She waved her hands as the people tried to interrupt. “I let my family threaten me and bully me into leaving the only man I’d ever loved. They didn’t like him because he was a farmer from the poor part of town. He wore hand me downs and couldn’t afford a car. Did they care about the fact that we were in love? They did not. They weren’t around when he used the last of his money to buy me a drink, even though it meant going without new clothes. They weren’t around when he watched the stars with me by the river. They weren’t around when he painted a picture of me so he could look at me at night when I wasn’t with him. And most of all, they weren’t around when he asked me to marry him and I said no.”

Her voice broke and I could tell that this story still shamed her.

“I said no because my family threatened to cut me off. They would have nothing to do with me. I was 17; I couldn’t make it on my own. I didn’t see that we could make it on our own. The next year, he married a penny farmer with no money to her name, and they were just fine. More than fine. They thrived, because they were in love. I vowed then and there to never love another person the way I loved Peter.”

I gaped. “His name was Peter?”

She smiled. “Yes. I named your father after him, because, for some odd reason, I could see a lot of him in your father. I hoped that your father would take after Peter and not me – and he did. You know, I didn’t even like your mother at first, but she never knew. Because along with vowing not to love another, I vowed I’d never get in the way of anyone else’s happiness.”

Tears were cascading down my cheeks from the hurt and love mixed in my grandmothers voice. I flew to her arms.

She whispered to me then. “If you love him, he’s worth it. That’s all that matters. Does he love you?”

I simply nodded.

“Then go for it.”

I got up. My parents’ met my eye and simply nodded, but a smile slipped over their faces. My heart melted forever.

As I headed to the bathroom, I saw my mom and dad on their knees beside my grandmother. She met my eye and winked.

My cell phone chimed. The caller id was a number I didn’t really know, but I answered anyway.

The background noise was overwhelming and for a minute I couldn’t make out what was being said. Finally, I heard something.

“Alex?”

It was Jack. The hair on the back of my neck rose.

“Jack?”

“ALEX!” His voice rose in a panic.

“Where are you, baby? What’s wrong?”

“I need you, Alex, I need you.”

“I’ll come, Jack. Just tell me where you are and –“

Too late. I heard the distinct click of the phone shutting off.

“Jack? Jack? JACK!” I screamed into the phone anyway. Uselessly.

I sank to my knees. “Jack,” I sobbed.

I had to find him.