We Let Go

Sydney

While the guys were at the fair, causing mayhem, I was going out with my own friends. Among them was Anna, me and Rian's neighbor, Elisabeth, a girl from my college class, Matt's sister Melanie and Vinny's sister Tori. Tori and Melanie were probably my best friends, however. They were the ones who were now sitting in my kitchen, drinking from the beer bottles and laughing while we waited for Anna and Elisabeth.

“Jesus, Sydney!” Tori said, taking another sip of her beer and laughing a little too hard. Melanie rolled her eyes as she sipped her water, trying to stay sober at least for one night. “You really need to like, go on tour with that shit,” She finished, wiping tears from her eyes as she watched me and Melanie roll our eyes and slap her across the face to sober her up. “Thanks, guys,” She mumbled, handing me her Bud to rub her cheeks. Melanie smiled.

“Matt is jealous of Rian, you know, Sydney,” Melanie said conversationally, making me raise my brows. She chuckled. “Matt thinks you're pretty!” She blurted, then blushed scarlet. I giggled. All Time Low's tour manager, Matt Flyzik, was attractive, no doubt, but he could never beat Rian. Rian was my one, my only. I smiled.

“Well, if me and Rian ever break up, he'll be the first I call!” I joked, making Tori laugh again, choking on her water.

“Vinny thinks you're pretty hot too, Syd,” Tori said with a smile and a wink, as if she knew something I didn't. I rolled my eyes as I pulled a diet Coke from the fridge, not even touching my beer. Melanie raised her brows, as if she suspected something.

“Sydney, have you been putting on a little weight?” Melanie said, barely concealing her grin. I raised my brows and shook my head. “Why didn't you touch your beer, Sydney?” Melanie asked, narrowing her eyes. “Sydney, are you carrying a child?” At that, I burst out laughing.

“Oh, God, no!” I said between breaths, laughing so hard my head started to pound and my vision began to swirl. Tori smacked me on the back, trying to make me breathe. Melanie just stared at me, and muttered to herself as she added some ice to her water. Tori rolled her eyes at Melanie, then chuckled.

“Melanie just wants to be an aunt, and Matt won't be giving her one any time soon, will he?” Tori said with a chuckle, grinning stupidly as she took another sip of her beer, making Melanie's face go tomato red. Tori and Melanie were like an old married couple. They were best friends, but they fought all the time. I loved them, almost as much as I loved Rian. A knock on the door brought the two out of their fighting. I ran to open it, revealing a windswept Anna, her grey eyes sparkling and her blonde hair under her floppy green cap, hiding her olive skin.

“ANNA!” I yelled, and Anna giggled.

“SYDNEY!” She yelled back, before we both dissolved into giggles. Me and Anna were like teenagers, giggling at everything. But we were close, and she had moved here after she moved here with her boyfriend, Benjamin. Tori and Melanie loved her too. “TORI. MELANIE!” Anna yelled, followed by their responses and hugs. “Where's Elisabeth?” Anna asked, once we were settled in the kitchen and Anna had a beer in her hand. We were just gonna hang out here tonight, since it was going to rain, and me and Elisabeth had class in the morning.

“She's probably being a bookworm, as usual,” Tori said, having always hated school. Which is why she never went to college and worked at Starbucks during the day and went on tour to do merch in the afternoons. She loved what she did, and we were happy for her. Melanie was a dance teacher at the local school, and she danced in competition on the weekends. She was so happy, it was amazing. Anna didn't have to work, since Benjamin provided for her. Me and Anna spent a lot of time together, since Elisabeth was always studying. She was the only reason I was passing most of my classes. She helped a lot.

“Oh shush. She's going to be an amazing teacher,” I argued, taking a sip of my beer. I still hated the way it burned my throat. I made a face, and went back to my Arnold Palmer. Tori chuckled as she downed her third beer, watching as Anna and Melanie danced around the kitchen, giggling and being silly. I loved times like these, I really did. They made life worth living.

“You are too, missy!” Melanie said, suddenly stopping dancing. “I know why you want to be a teacher, Sydney,” She said sneakily, crossing her arms over her chest and watching me with a smirk. I raised my brows.

“Why is that, Melanie? Is it more than the fact that I just really like kids?” I asked, chuckling a little and taking another sip of my Arnold Palmer.

“You want kids of your own. But Rian isn't ready for that yet, so you're compromising by working with the kids you want to have,” Anna said with a smirk, as if she could read Melanie's mind. Somehow, I wouldn't put it past her. She was a genius.

“I want kids, but not yet. I'm 22! I don't want children quite yet, little duckies,” I said quietly, hiding my eyes in the bottle of my Arnold Palmer. I was lying. I wanted kids, and I wanted to have Rian's kids. Everyone told us that we could have adorable children, and I agreed.

And, I wanted to love a child like I hadn't been loved. I wanted to prove the world wrong.

But Rian, of course, wanted to wait. To wait to see if we could smooth things out and not fight before we decided to have a kid. Which I understood, but I didn't want to wait. But I would have to. I could wait, but I just didn't want to. I wanted a little baby girl, and name her Jasey Rae. And she would be mine.