Status: Completed.
The Diary of Alice Quinn
II.
Everything was normal for us after that. Like I said, we didn’t even remember doing it. So things went on the way they usually were. Until I didn’t get my period. I chose not to panic. I told myself it’s just some hormonal problem. It’s no big deal. You haven’t even had sex yet.
And the moment I said it was the moment I realized it. You see, usually my gut’s always right. I just have this strong sense of what is and what isn’t. I was one-hundred percent positive that I was pregnant.
I could not tell Zach. I told myself that whatever happens, Zach was not to know about this baby. Not now, not ever.
Because that school year, Zach was graduating. If I had told him, I would’ve bet everything I own that he would stay in this puny little town, Little Meadows. He would not leave this place and let go of the once in a life time opportunity that was handed to him a few months earlier.
Zach loved to sing and play the guitar. Next to me, his guitar was his love. Sometimes I think that he even fell for it first, because when I met him he already had a guitar strapped behind his back, but it was a slightly small version of his guitar now.
He sang all the time. To me, mostly. He sang ballads and love songs and rock songs and sometimes even country songs. And I couldn’t even begin to describe his voice without sounding too cliché and cheesy and pretentious. All I can say is that his voice was and will always be the most beautiful thing I will ever hear in my life and it still haunts me to this day.
One Friday night, he was singing on stage at a local café that was about ten minutes from my house then. It was his weekly gig. Afterwards, we would go to the Crescent Hill and Zach would park at the very top of it and we would watch the stars together on the hood of his car. From the hill, you could also see most of the town. That has been our tradition ever since he learned how to drive, and that was why I loved Fridays.
After his last song, a man approached him and whispered into his ear after he had reached out a small white square that looked like business card. I knew this was something good, because when the man left, I saw the lopsided smile that I have always fallen head over heels for appear on his face. I asked him who that was, and he said the man was a representative from Gatsby Records, a recording company that’s known for finding fresh and new talent from all over the country. The man said he was quite interested in Zach, and said that if he ever wanted a career in the music industry Zach should give him a call. Zach said he would think about it, and the man said it would be okay, but he would still have a contract ready for him to sign at anytime.
I told him that that was wonderful and that I was so, so happy for him. Then, I asked him why he didn’t say yes immediately. Singing was his dream. And Zach was born to be a star; everyone knew that. He had been fantasizing about the day he gets discovered ever since I knew him. It was such a surprise he didn’t say yes as soon as possible.
What he said next was also a surprise to me.
He said he didn’t really want to leave our town. He said he wanted to stay, marry me here and start a family. He would still sing at cafés, and maybe offer entertainment services during local events. He would find ways to still “kind of sort of” live his dream.
Of course, I knew that was a completely stupid idea. I would not let him give up his dream for me. I wouldn’t let him stay. Never. Zach deserved to leave this town that nothing ever happened in and make the world fall in love with him like I did. The world needed him. I believed that he could change the world with only his voice. He could do it. I knew he could. He was my Superman.
So I got angry. He got angry that I got angry. I said a lot of things, things I don’t even remember now. Everything was a blur. All I know is that it was the biggest argument we’ve ever had. There was a lot of slamming doors, shouts and tears.
After three days of not speaking he finally went up to my room one night. He told me loved me, and he was sorry for losing his temper on me but I should have respected his decision, even if he knew that I was angry at him for his own good. He said that no matter what happened, he would stay with me.
We kissed and made up. But, I still had hope. Hours later, lying on my bed with him stroking my hair, I asked him if he would still think about it. He said he still kept the card, and he would.
I nodded, hanging on to a thread. Zach’s thread. The thread that would lead him to the place where he was meant to be.
And the moment I said it was the moment I realized it. You see, usually my gut’s always right. I just have this strong sense of what is and what isn’t. I was one-hundred percent positive that I was pregnant.
I could not tell Zach. I told myself that whatever happens, Zach was not to know about this baby. Not now, not ever.
Because that school year, Zach was graduating. If I had told him, I would’ve bet everything I own that he would stay in this puny little town, Little Meadows. He would not leave this place and let go of the once in a life time opportunity that was handed to him a few months earlier.
Zach loved to sing and play the guitar. Next to me, his guitar was his love. Sometimes I think that he even fell for it first, because when I met him he already had a guitar strapped behind his back, but it was a slightly small version of his guitar now.
He sang all the time. To me, mostly. He sang ballads and love songs and rock songs and sometimes even country songs. And I couldn’t even begin to describe his voice without sounding too cliché and cheesy and pretentious. All I can say is that his voice was and will always be the most beautiful thing I will ever hear in my life and it still haunts me to this day.
One Friday night, he was singing on stage at a local café that was about ten minutes from my house then. It was his weekly gig. Afterwards, we would go to the Crescent Hill and Zach would park at the very top of it and we would watch the stars together on the hood of his car. From the hill, you could also see most of the town. That has been our tradition ever since he learned how to drive, and that was why I loved Fridays.
After his last song, a man approached him and whispered into his ear after he had reached out a small white square that looked like business card. I knew this was something good, because when the man left, I saw the lopsided smile that I have always fallen head over heels for appear on his face. I asked him who that was, and he said the man was a representative from Gatsby Records, a recording company that’s known for finding fresh and new talent from all over the country. The man said he was quite interested in Zach, and said that if he ever wanted a career in the music industry Zach should give him a call. Zach said he would think about it, and the man said it would be okay, but he would still have a contract ready for him to sign at anytime.
I told him that that was wonderful and that I was so, so happy for him. Then, I asked him why he didn’t say yes immediately. Singing was his dream. And Zach was born to be a star; everyone knew that. He had been fantasizing about the day he gets discovered ever since I knew him. It was such a surprise he didn’t say yes as soon as possible.
What he said next was also a surprise to me.
He said he didn’t really want to leave our town. He said he wanted to stay, marry me here and start a family. He would still sing at cafés, and maybe offer entertainment services during local events. He would find ways to still “kind of sort of” live his dream.
Of course, I knew that was a completely stupid idea. I would not let him give up his dream for me. I wouldn’t let him stay. Never. Zach deserved to leave this town that nothing ever happened in and make the world fall in love with him like I did. The world needed him. I believed that he could change the world with only his voice. He could do it. I knew he could. He was my Superman.
So I got angry. He got angry that I got angry. I said a lot of things, things I don’t even remember now. Everything was a blur. All I know is that it was the biggest argument we’ve ever had. There was a lot of slamming doors, shouts and tears.
After three days of not speaking he finally went up to my room one night. He told me loved me, and he was sorry for losing his temper on me but I should have respected his decision, even if he knew that I was angry at him for his own good. He said that no matter what happened, he would stay with me.
We kissed and made up. But, I still had hope. Hours later, lying on my bed with him stroking my hair, I asked him if he would still think about it. He said he still kept the card, and he would.
I nodded, hanging on to a thread. Zach’s thread. The thread that would lead him to the place where he was meant to be.