The Saints Of Mibba
You Always Rise.
It's never the action, but the consequence.
It's not what happens, but how you deal with it.
That's how you survive. That's how you keep on living.
There are things in this world which you will never be safe from.
But every danger, every risk, every fall can be faced, beaten, risen up from.
This is my life as I know it.
I'm your average antisocial geek. I wouldn't have said I've changed in any major way since I was thirteen.
Seventh of June, last year. That's when my life changed completely.
I had started talking to a girl on Youtube. Then one day, out of the blue, she e-mailed me a note. No more than 4 lines long. At the end, I remember it saying "I hope you respect my choice."
Action.
There's an extreme clarity in my head about what I did next. I was sitting by the computer, and I looked around. I was alone in the room. I had never felt so alone in my life. I just leant my head on the desk. It must have been for five minutes, maybe more. When I heard my sister come back in, I got up and went to the bathroom.
I didn't know what to think. Didn't know what to do. I ended up sitting on the floor and just crying. It was then that everything just seemed to stop mattering.
Consequence.
It's not what happens, but how you deal with it.
You see, the story doesn't end there.
I got up from the floor. I walked back onto the computer.
I asked one of my best friends for help.
She replied two minutes later.
We spent most of the night, just talking it out.
It took me the best part of that year for most of her words to sink in.
As it goes, the girl was fine. But it took just a little too long for her to tell me this--for the damage not to already have been done. I stopped talking to her, I've never forgiven her. But I hoe one day I find the courage to do so. Because everyone has their dark days. And everyone should get the chance to be forgiven.
Let us now lurch forward in time. Because there's always a rise from the fall.
Another friend.
Just your average conversation.
I don't know what it is she said, but there was this one moment, when things just started mattering again. I started caring again. For the first time, I felt like I was living again.
The most ironic thing is, my friend that night, and my friend now--neither of them know how much they saved my life. I doubt they ever will.
So here we are. Eight months on. Far from avoiding the computer, my life is now lived on it.
MSN and, like some wonderful bonus, Mibba.
And now I'm sitting here, laughing at what someone's written in a conversation, and realising something I hope I remember.
There are things in this world which you will never be safe from.
Things which you can't help but face.
You fall, but you will always rise.
You'll always rise, because there is always going to be someone who will care enough to notice.
There will always be someone who will hold out their hand to help you get up.
All you need to do is take it.
It's not what happens, but how you deal with it.
That's how you survive. That's how you keep on living.
There are things in this world which you will never be safe from.
But every danger, every risk, every fall can be faced, beaten, risen up from.
This is my life as I know it.
I'm your average antisocial geek. I wouldn't have said I've changed in any major way since I was thirteen.
Seventh of June, last year. That's when my life changed completely.
I had started talking to a girl on Youtube. Then one day, out of the blue, she e-mailed me a note. No more than 4 lines long. At the end, I remember it saying "I hope you respect my choice."
Action.
There's an extreme clarity in my head about what I did next. I was sitting by the computer, and I looked around. I was alone in the room. I had never felt so alone in my life. I just leant my head on the desk. It must have been for five minutes, maybe more. When I heard my sister come back in, I got up and went to the bathroom.
I didn't know what to think. Didn't know what to do. I ended up sitting on the floor and just crying. It was then that everything just seemed to stop mattering.
Consequence.
It's not what happens, but how you deal with it.
You see, the story doesn't end there.
I got up from the floor. I walked back onto the computer.
I asked one of my best friends for help.
She replied two minutes later.
We spent most of the night, just talking it out.
It took me the best part of that year for most of her words to sink in.
As it goes, the girl was fine. But it took just a little too long for her to tell me this--for the damage not to already have been done. I stopped talking to her, I've never forgiven her. But I hoe one day I find the courage to do so. Because everyone has their dark days. And everyone should get the chance to be forgiven.
Let us now lurch forward in time. Because there's always a rise from the fall.
Another friend.
Just your average conversation.
I don't know what it is she said, but there was this one moment, when things just started mattering again. I started caring again. For the first time, I felt like I was living again.
The most ironic thing is, my friend that night, and my friend now--neither of them know how much they saved my life. I doubt they ever will.
So here we are. Eight months on. Far from avoiding the computer, my life is now lived on it.
MSN and, like some wonderful bonus, Mibba.
And now I'm sitting here, laughing at what someone's written in a conversation, and realising something I hope I remember.
There are things in this world which you will never be safe from.
Things which you can't help but face.
You fall, but you will always rise.
You'll always rise, because there is always going to be someone who will care enough to notice.
There will always be someone who will hold out their hand to help you get up.
All you need to do is take it.
♠ ♠ ♠
by Sheepy.