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The cold streets were filled with empty cars and lights barely luminating the alleyways.I watched old beggars clutch their shirts and jackets tightly, to escape the December air.It was hard on them,but it was hard on me as well.I felt the icy coldness crawl down my spine and leak into my bloodstream.

It wasn't the condition of the weather.

It was her.She had made me feel like this.Her gray eyes alone were enough to penetrate all strength I felt against these bitter conditions.It was like she had burrowed herself in my mind,and sent messages throughout my body to prevent even a bit of warmth from radiating to my skin.

I felt betrayed and I wanted to just erase her from me.I couldn't even if I tried.She's just a part of me and in the back of my head,she always will be.She'll disappear after a while,but she'll always manage to find a way to come back.

I hated her for it,but what could I do?I set myself up for something I'll never be able to give back.

I breathed into my frozen hands in attempt to put some life back into them.It was no use,like usual.It's Christmas Eve,so the Winter is sinking in deeper now.I'm still waiting for the first snow to fall just like everyone else.But who knows when that'll happen..it always comes at the last moment.

I kicked a soda can in front of me,listening to the clanking of it's void inside.It was just like me.I felt void of all happiness,and the night didn't help me any.It was just all dreary;wet,freezing and bursting with the anxiousness of precipitation.All I could do now was wait for things to fall over and just settle.That's all any of us could do.

We couldn't predict the future,so why should we try?It only causes more heartache than we'd want to set ourselves out for.

I just hope wherever she is,she's feeling the same way.It'd be cruel for us to feel so melancholy and her feel so lively.

It's not supposed to happen.

I round the street corner of Lyson and Freeton only to walk in the path of the same scenery.Different stores,but same scenario.Just like everything else I've seen,it's no different.

"Could you spare some change?"I look to my left to find a dirty,middle aged man,with a hat on his head and jacket on his shoulders.He looked so tired and hopeless,I felt bad for him.

"Yes,sir."I reached into my pocket and took out a 50 dollar bill.I lingered over it for a few seconds before looking up at the guy with a smile and held it out to him.He took it with great gratitude and nodded to me."Thanks."

He touched the side of my face and smiled warmly at me before leaving in the opposite direction of me.I looked back at him and sighed.It felt good to do something right for once.It almost made me feel like a whole person.But as she reached the surface of my thoughts,she drowned me right back into the pool of self pity.I continued foward without anymore hesitation.

How could one person,make me feel this way?It wasn't like she even loved me in the first place,so I shouldn't care so much about it.But deep inside,it bothers me greatly.I never appreciated the whole guilt trip thing,so I always tried to avoid those obstacles in relationships that would cause me this type of agony later on.And yet,it just comes back to bite me in the ass.It's almost like an inevitable thing.

Ahead of me,I hear an ear piercing scream and the sound of people scuffling around.I slow my pace down as I inch towards the noises until I come to the pinnacle of the raucous.

I peer past the brick wall to see a man fighting with a woman.Her face is completely drenched in fear as his is scrunched up in animosity.I think my heart finally met the end of my stomach when I saw who she was;Evelyn.The person who made me feel like I'd never see the light of day again.And she's 100 feet in front of me,being assaulted.

I just stood in my spot,unable to move or function correctly.What am I supposed to do?I wanted so bad for her to hurt like I hurt.

But it's hard to do when it pains me even more to see her feel the bitter cold from another lifeless creature.

I just watched him punch her in the jaw and slam her against the door of an empty restaraunt.She flailed around to try and make it harder for him to grab her,but it just made him burn even more.After a few minutes her threw her on the ground and kicked her in the stomach.

"Worthless piece of shit.Go home and clean your face.Fucking cunt.."

He walked down the alley to the next block,fists balled up from being so worked up.I slowly retreated from my hiding place and made my way over to her dishelved body on the ground.I looked at her face;it was red from being hit so much and I could see a bruise forming on her upper cheek.She gripped her stomach as if to try and soothe whatever pain she was in.She looked up to me and stared into my eyes."Please..help..me."
Every word she said came out with a white breeze only signifying just how cold it really was getting.I crouched down to get closer to her and put my hand on her bruising cheek.I felt the tears from her eyes leaking onto my skin;the only bit of feeling that was left had soaked it in.I felt something gently fall onto my head and I looked up to the sky.It was finally starting to snow.I looked back down to her tiny frame and eyed her from head to toe.She really looked hurt,but she's lucky he didn't do any worse damage.

I sighed and looked into her eyes one last time.

"I can't help you anymore."