Blue Sky and Other Things That Are Good For You

woke up to small kisses trailing across my shoulder. “mmm.” I mumble, letting the light hit my eyes as they flutter open.

“good morning.” Ryan whispers in my ear, nibbling a little, making me giggle. “I love your laugh.”

“good to know.” I say, still tired and sore, “and morning to you too.” I groan a little from the soreness as I start to sit up.

“you okay?” Ryan asks.

“fine. Dandy. Totally sore.”

he laughs a little and kisses my forehead, “why don't you get in the bath for a bit and I'll get breakfast ready.”

I look over at him like he's crazy, “you're going to make breakfast?”

“well, I can try, right?”

“right. Just, make sure it's not raw.” I say and wrap the sheet around me as I climb out of bed.

I run the hot water and draw a steaming hot bath. When I slip in my body instantly started to relax. I forgot how amazing these felt. I stayed in there for about an hour before I decided it was time to actually wake up and get ready for the day.

The kitchen smelled amazing, surprisingly, and Ryan was standing above the stove flipping pancakes. I walk up and wrap my arms around him, “okay, so you're not doing too shabby of a job.”

“thank you. How was your bath?”

“fantastic.” I answer, and then take a seat at the table. Ryan places a plate filled with pancakes in front of my and then grabs one for himself. “hey Ryan?”

“hmm?”

“I was thinking that when we get back, I should probably move back home.”

he sets his fork down, “what?”

“It seems like time that I go home for once. That's all.”

“does this have something to do with last night?”

“no, of course not. It's just, I haven't really been back there since the accident and I thought it would be good, for both of us, if I moved home for awhile. It doesn't have to be permanent or anything.”

“and how is this good?”

“We were sleeping in the same bed before we were even together. Doesn't that just seem a little weird to you? Like we skipped a step somewhere along the way? I know we didn't really date, and that's fine. But there's not dating and then there's going to straight to living with each other.”

“remember what I said on Christmas? About not being able to sleep without you, well I wasn't exactly joking there Sky. I literally couldn't sleep without you in my arms.” he reminds me.

“which is sweet, really. But you're going off to college in September and you're going to have to sleep without me. And remember what I said? That distance doesn't matter?”

“I know.” he mumbles.

“how about we just try it out for a couple of weeks, if it doesn't work than I'll come back to living with you guys.”

“promise?”

“promise.”

“and this has nothing to do with last night.”

“absolutely, positively, has nothing to do with last night.”

“okay then... I guess if this is really what you want.”

I take a couple bites of my food. “Ryan, I'm going to tell you something and you have to keep in mind that I love you, okay?”

“you didn't kill anybody, did you?”

“wait-what? Why would you think-no, I didn't kill anybody.”

“just making sure.”

I roll my eyes, “remember my whole reason on why I couldn't get close to you?” I ask him.

“because every time somebody got close, they left.”

“yeah, exactly. And I survived by not allowing anyone in. I had built this wall that kept me from getting hurt. So the more you wanted to know about me, the more I stepped away. That's just how I was ever since I realized I had to survive on my own.” I pause, trying to gather my thoughts. “but then I started to like you, and slowly, very slowly, you were getting through the wall. By Christmas I realized that I loved you for, well, many reasons. The fact is, that I love you, and loving you has made me rely on you more.”

“which is bad I'm assuming?” his voice edging with hurt.

“not bad, per say, just not the best. I've spent so many years building up this wall around people and so when you come along and can so easily, practically crush it, I don't know what to do. You know everything there is to know about me Ryan. You know things that literally no one else on the planet knows. And then last night, when we became as close as possible, well, let's just say that that wall doesn't exist anymore.”

“and going home is going to fix that?”

“I need to make sure that I'm still capable of taking care of myself when I need to.”

“haven't we been over this? That I'm not planning on leaving you?”

I smile at how hard he was trying and slide into the seat next to his, “it's not you that I'm worried about Ryan.”

“then what? Because you know I'll always be there for you, right?”

“you'll know when the time comes. Now, let's go make a sand castle.” I pull him up out of his seat and make sure he's smiling before running out the front door with him not far behind.

I feel a pair of arms grab me and scream, “Ack!” while laughing.

Ryan tripped over his own feet, making us both tumble down to the soft sand. Well, actually, I hit the water, he hit the sand. He starts to stand up and run but I grabbed his ankle, “oh no you don't.” he fell on top of me in the water.

“oh, that's how we're playing huh?” he asks, hovering above me. The waves crashed against us, splashing water into my face. Ryan reaches over and grabs something in the water, then I feel a gooey substance on my stomach.

“ew Ryan! That's disgusting.”

he laughs, “you were so asking for it.”

I grab a handful of the wet sand and put it in his hair, “and you were asking for that.”

This then turned into a mud fight with us running and laughing and just having an overall great time.