Second Chances, Bad Habits

Standing on the edge of the stage I watched Deli and the rest of the guys get ready to go on, the pang of fear in my stomach from earlier today still hadn’t gone away if anything it had gotten worse. Looking to my right I saw Max and on my left was Andy. I don’t know why I’m so worried. Deli will do great on stage. But maybe that isn’t what’s really worrying me.

Again I looked over my shoulder and saw Max. Him and Deli are quite buddy buddy now and that worries me to no end. He use to be really into drugs and shit like that frankly I think he still is even though he claimed he was clean after rehab.

A Day of Rain set started out really damn amazingly, by the second chorus the crowd of fans were singing along with Deli. Andy nodded in approval and Max was just watching her with stars in his eyes. Turning back to Deli I noted how bright the lights were, you would think someone would take care of that she probably can’t even see the edge of the stage.

Shrugging the minor mishap off I went back to watching, Jake and Harry were smiling like idiots this is probably the biggest venue they’ve ever played. Even Mason smiled a little which was surprising because he never shows any emotion.

The song ended and they were just starting the next one Deli began to say something to the crowd, she approached the very edge of the stage and then as if in slow motion I saw it all go down. Deli fell from the stage to the ground luckily the crowd wasn’t close enough to get her, the guys stopped playing and rushed towards her. Pushing past them I ran to where she lay on the floor in agony.

“Deli!” her eyes shut and I knew she had blacked out.

By now Max and Andy had come running as well.

“Fuck! Someone call an ambulance!” I didn’t want to move her and hurt her more but I had to get her out of the way so another bang could at least pick up the show and continue on.

“I have them on the line!” a roadie held a cell phone to his ear and was informing the dispatcher what had just happened.

“Mason, go get someone to cover the rest of your time slot and Austin get your ass up their and tell the fans you’re sorry but Deli’s in critical condition.” doing as I had told them everyone scrambled around like they were chickens that had their heads cut off.

Carefully with Andy’s help we carried Deli to the back of the venue where everyone else was. Kicking the door to A Day of Rain’s dressing room we carefully laid her down on the couch. Covering my mouth with the back of my hand I felt tears come to my eyes.

“Ash?” Andy tip toed up behind me placing a hand on my shoulder .

“Y-yeah?” sniffling I tried to pull myself back together.

“She’s going to be okay I just know it.” he tried to smile as he spoke but I noticed how the smile quivered.

“I-I, what about the twins?” chewing on my lip I felt my tears start to fall down my cheeks at the possibility of losing the babies after I had just come to terms with becoming a father.

“They’ll be okay Ash.”

As Andy spoke the EMT’s came rushing in with a stretcher. I stood back and watched as they carefully picked her up and strapped her in. The two men looked between Andy and I.

“Which one of you is either her family or significant other?” raising my hand the guy nodded and grunted at me motioning for me to follow along. Once we were in the back of the cramped little ambulance they both began to fuss over her and question me.

“Is she allergic to any medication?” with tears still in my eyes I held her hand tightly in mine.

“Not that I know of.” the man nodded as he put and IV in the hand that I wasn’t holding.

“Is she allergic to eggs or any kind of synthetic?” shaking my head no I sighed.

“No but she is a vegetarian.” again the man nodded.

“Is there anyway she might possibly be menstruating, nursing, or with child, or trying to conceive?” swallowing hard I looked the man in the eye.

“She’s pregnant with twins, she’s just barely a month along.” a very worried look crossed the man’s face. The look on his face made me chew my lip harder slowly I began to tear up again, please god if you’re real or listening please don’t’ let anything happen to her or the kids.

*****

When Deli and I arrived that the hospital’s emergency wing she was whisked off to the operating room and I was pulled aside by one of the younger nurses.

“Sir are you with that young lady who they just brought in?” nodding I dabbed at my eyes.

“Yes, I-I um, I am.” she lead me towards the waiting room that was strangely almost empty. I wonder if the guys are going to be here I really fucking hope they will be because I’ll go mad if I’m left alone here in this sterile little cube.

“Okay, well I’m going to need you to fill out these forms and bring them back up to me at the front desk.” the smiled at me warmly her smile brought out the life in her pail blue eyes.

“Thank you but um what are all of these?” chewing on my lip I looked up at her for help.

“They’re just insurance forms,” she pointed to the pink paper on the clipboard in my lap. “and this one is just an explanation to what happened.”

“Oh well thank you.” bidding me a quick goodbye the nurse who’s name I had failed to read of her hospital ID quickly walked back to her station.

Sighing I picked up the pen that was attached to the clipboard by a string, crossing my legs I got situated and began to fill out the forms. Half the shit that the papers asked for I didn’t know so I left them blank or just guess, trying to decode the medical mumbo jumbo took my mind off everything that had happened.

After turning the papers in to the nurse at the front desk I sat down in the chair I had been in before and waited. I flipped through a USA Today magazine when that got boring I flipped through an old issue of People and once that got old I tossed it on to the chair beside me and watched the TV overhead that was playing reruns of Becker. No matter how hard I tried to keep my mind on the TV and the story line of the show I just couldn’t my mind kept floating back to Deli and our unborn children.

Sitting there with nothing to do but think I decided that rather than worrying about Deli and my kids why not try and think happy thoughts? As I began to day dream about the twins I settled on that they would both be girls one would be named Cassidy Ann and the other Carolyn Marie. Once my day dreams had taken over my brain the guys walked though the doors of the hospital. Everyone was talking. Standing I swallowed hard. The gist of what they were say/asking was what the hell happened and where the fuck is she?

“Guys sit down and shut the fuck up you’re in a hospital.” they all grumbled at me but did what I said. You know what I’m starting to like this whole we’re all just going to listen to Ashley and do as he says thing.

“Where’s Deli?” Mason looked down at his feet.

“She’s in the operating room. I don’t know when she’ll be out.” the group of men nodded.

“Is she okay?” CC looked up at me with his big innocent brown eyes.

“I-I don’t know CC.” closing my eyes I felt my eyes start to water again.

I don’t know what I’m going to do if she isn’t okay.