Past Mistakes

Miranda let out a sigh of relief as she allowed herself to fall back, laying against the slope of the small grassy hill at the park. Her arms sprawled out on either side of her, her brown eyes shut with a small smile gracing her lips. The night air wasn’t too cold; just perfect for her. The sky was dark, a deep blue and the stars twinkling above her in all its glory. It was quiet and peaceful. It could relax her into a light slumber if she was alone.

Zack wrapped his arms around his knees, smiling down at the girl laying next to him. He rested his head on his folded arms, his green eyes slowly scanning over her facial features. The curve on the bridge of her nose, the contour of her lips, the angelic, peaceful smile that held it all together. She was truly beautiful, and his heart raced faster as he contemplated on what to do next. He lifted his head back up and looked away, his eyes diverting to the stars. It was certainly comforting.

Miranda slowly opened an eye, peeking up at him. She had felt his stare on her, and all the while she liked it, she had to wonder why and what was on his mind. She reached over to him, pinching his sides slightly, startling him. “Watcha thinking?” she said with a soft giggle at the way his body leaned away from her slightly, his eyes wide in alarm.

“N-Nothing.” He rubbed his side, still able to feel the imprints of her small fingers. He wanted to tell her, oh did he want to, but he wasn’t too confident in speaking what was on his mind at the moment. For all he knows, his mind could just be tricking him; he needed some sign of reassurance.

“Liar.” She rolled onto her stomach, propping herself up on her elbows. She folded her hands together and looked up at him, silently telling him to spill everything to her - he always spilled everything to her; she was already expecting it.

Zack looked into her eyes, staying quiet for a while. Her face showed absolute interest, attentive ears, just like every time he spoke to her. Her attention was always just on him, never on any other distractions - not her cell phone, not the people walking around, not even the stars could tear her eyes away from him. He knew that he had her full attention, always have.

“Well,” he took in a deep breath, “I was just wondering why you like me really - w-why you like to be around me?” He started out strong and confident, but halfway through, he quickly corrected his words. But who was he fooling? He couldn’t even fool himself.

Miranda tried to keep her smile from growing at his sudden embarrassment. She knew exactly what he had meant, and it was quite adorable that he still couldn’t quite come out with it. She picked at the blades of grass near her fingers.

“Well,” she tried to gather all of her thoughts into one place. It’d be better if she was honest about it, and save him the trouble. “Aside the fact that you share my love for photography, you’re musically talented, I mean, who doesn’t want to hang around a musician with a real hobby?” She teased a bit, a soft laugh leaving her lips. “But, you’re a really nice guy, sweet, funny, and you care about things.” She tried to think of more qualities of his that weren’t so in-depth, not wanting yet to exploit her entire view of him. Even as she told him the most cliche and generic traits that pulled her in, her heart raced in anticipation for what will happen once she told him. “Let’s not forget that you’re uber cute with your curls and your eyes and how shy you get,” she added with a grin, watching the way his cheeks turned a pink hue. “But most importantly,” she shrugged, “it’s hard to describe but... I just like everything that you are.”

Zack glanced over at her shyly. “Really?” he asked quietly. When he had asked her, he hadn’t expected such an answer. People usually don’t give a long list of traits, let alone, one that seem to have come so easily to their mind.

“Of course.” She chuckled softly, smiling brightly as she patted his thigh. “I love being around you, whenever and wherever you ask me out.” Perhaps she hadn’t thought about her words carefully before she spoke them, but within them lies a subtle hint that she knew was there and truthfully, didn’t mind at all that it had slipped out.

A brief moment of silence fell between them as Zack processed her words. He has no doubts in his mind now. These are words of a girl that likes him, not a girl who’s offering kind words to assure that he is a good guy. She had never once turned him down, and has always replied to him so happily, so positively. There never seem to be a bad day around him.

Zack turned his body towards her, clearing his throat. “Well- uhm, whenever and wherever, huh?” he stuttered quietly, laughing nervously but softly. “Okay, well uh, I-I guess - I’ll just get straight to it.” Another soft laugh, and it all flowed from his lips almost effortlessly. “Miranda, would you be my girlfriend?”

A subtle smile pulled on the corner of her lips, her brown eyes looking at him in wonder. “Did it really take you this long to ask me, Zack?” Miranda asked softly, now rolling back onto her back, her hands folded neatly over her stomach.

Picking on a small flower, he barely nodded with a small smile, a wave of relief instantly washing over him. He shuffled around until he was laying on his stomach adjacent to her, his torso propped up on his elbows like she previously was. He picked at the blades of grass before his fingers slowly inched towards her dark hair spread about on the grass, twirling a few pieces of hair between his fingers.

Miranda laughed softly and reached up, placing her index finger under his chin and tilting his face up to hers so that his green eyes could finally look at her. “You’re adorable, did you know that?” she whispered. “And absolutely wonderful.”

With a smile, Zack leaned forward and pressed his lips softly against hers, his eyes slipping shut. It was short, but soft and sweet - everything he had imagined their first kiss to be. He barely had the chance to pull away before she pulled him back down to her by the collar of his shirt, her lips moving slowly against his. No words were longer needed to be spoken between them. No more confessions of feelings, of thoughts, of secrets. They both knew what they wanted together.

And as for Zack, it had been right in front of him all along. All the time wasted on dwelling and self-pity, all the time he had wasted on desperately trying to get girls that wouldn’t like him, girls that liked everything he wasn’t. All of it, a big waste when he could’ve spent his time doing something better. He could’ve worried less about comparing himself to his friends, he could’ve realized sooner what he needed or who he wanted, he could’ve realized who was actually worth it.

He could’ve been with her sooner.