The Memories of Broken Dreams

No… This couldn’t be happening. This can’t be real. I’d been so sure. So fucking sure. Amanda smiled at me and attacked my with a hug. “Oh my god! I’m so glad that is over. I still think it’s stupid you’re record company needed a doctor to confirm it.” She pouted. “But that’s all good now.” I simple nodded, feel numb. “I have to go.” I muttered. “Recording.” I said vaguely. I grabbed a jacket and made my way over to Jack’s house.

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“Fuck dude. You’re serious?” He gasped. “No Jack I’m joking.” I said blankly. “So what’s the plan now?” He wondered. “There is no plan Jack.” I yelled and hit the wall in frustration. “The baby is mine. That’s it, this is the end. There is no way I can get Lily back now.” I slit down against the wall until I was sitting. I pulled my knees to my chest and dropped my head.

After a minute or so I looked up to my best friend. “Jack, what do I do now?” I whispered. He sat down next to me and patted my shoulder. “I’m so sorry Alex. I know how much you wanted that baby not to be yours, but it is. It’s your child, you’re going to be a dad. Maybe you should look at this as a second chance. A chance to do things right.” He said softly.
I nodded. He was right, I’d screwed up with Lily and Ally, maybe I could make up for a few things with this baby.

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Six months later

After realizing this was really happening it took me a week to let it all sink in. But once it had I asked Amanda to move in with me, I wanted to make sure this baby had a good and stable family.

Slowly, but surely I more and more excepted that Amanda and I were having a child together. I managed to look passed all the things that used to annoy me so much and discovered that underneath the bleach blond hair and fake tan was a sweet and caring girl who was sincerely excited to become a mother.

I started to take her out more, spending our time talking instead of making out. I wasn’t in love with her, nor was I falling for her, but we’d become closer in the past two months on a friendship level.

I was glad to have Amanda as a friend, but even though she was my girlfriend and the mother of my unborn child I would never be in love with her. Because there was only one girl I’d even loved and that was the girl who’d had my heart ever since I first met her.

But unfortunately for me that girl was now engaged with one of my best friends. I looked at the happy couple who’d just announced the news. I watched everyone circle around them, congratulating them and I suddenly felt sick. I ran out of my apartment, desperate for air. '

It was official, I’d lost Lily for good.