Breathe Me

For the first time in years I actually felt like I could breathe again. The second I stepped foot into Pittsburgh,I felt all of my worries and fears diminish one by one. I was starting a new chapter in my life,a happier,much less painful one.

"You're going to love it here,I know you will" Pascal looked at me smiling as we waited in the snow for Aunt Carole to pick us up from the airport.

Despite feeling happy,I also felt scared. There's always that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you are nervous or scared. I was terrified that Uncle Pascal's friends were going to hate me because of my quiet personality.

That's how it was in High School,being bullied everyday just because I was the quiet small girl who hated talking to others. Girls would make fun of me for how skinny and small I was,and guys would say horrible things to me,trying to get me to cry. I never did cry though,sure they said some horrible things,but it was absolutely nothing compared to what I had to suffer at home. The horrible words that came out of my parents mouths everyday would stick with me for the rest of my life. They said how nobody could ever love someone like me,how I was a disgusting person and deserved to be alone for the rest of my life. I believed them.

How could anybody love someone like me? I was broken beyond repair. I would never be the same person I was 10 years ago. Free,confident,optimistic. That had all went down the drain when my dad had died.

Pascal picked up my suitcases as a beautiful black Escalade stopped in front of us. I glanced at him,pulling all of the suitcases and bags to the trunk of the car,desperately trying not to slip on the icy sidewalk,I shook my head smiling and got into the backseat of the car.

"Oh Sophia! You have grown so much sweetie!" Aunt Carole was turned around in the driver's seat of the car smiling at me. "Thanks Aunt Carole." It came out as a shy whisper. She had been my aunt for nearly 10 years,and I was still shy around her.

Pascal had always been the only person I could talk to about anything. I never was a talkative person,even as a little girl I would just hang around the adults,not wanting to play with the other kids. At a young age I had learned that getting attached to people just meant pain in the end. The last thing I needed in my life was even more pain.

The hockey player finally made it into the passenger seat of the car,buckled himself in,and immediately kissed his wife with a huge smile on his face. They were perfect for each other,and I found myself smiling as they both talked enthusiastically to one another.

As we drove through Pittsburgh,I stared out the window in awe. It was completely different than I expected it to be. I didn't think there would be so many tall buildings,so many crowds of people scattered on the sidewalks. There was so much beauty to take in from the Steel city. It was strange going from a small town,to a huge city like this,it was overwhelming.

I wasn't sure how long we had been driving for,everything was like blur to me. I was so worn out,and I felt like I would pass out at any moment. It had been a long week,from getting the worse beating of my life,to waking up in a hospital with Uncle Pascal by my side,to packing up everything and leaving my home town. I rested my head on the cold window,my eyelids felt like they weighed a hundred pounds as I fought to keep them open. I nearly lost the battle,when Pascal said something,causing me to jump at his loud voice.

"We're home Sophie." Home The word sounded foreign to me,I was finally home. With a real family who wouldn't hurt me anymore

"Are you sure you don't need help with that?" I asked Pascal,who was struggling once again with the suitcases. "Eh don't worry,just a few bags,nothing I can't handle. Go inside before you freeze your ass off! Carole will show you which room is yours" He let out a loud groan when he tried to lift the suitcases out of the trunk with no success.

The kids must have been sleeping because the house was stranglely quiet. All of the times I had been to my uncle's house,it was always loud,sounds of the children's loud squeels would echo through the halls as they played hide and go seek with their dad. Loud giggles would be heard throughout all of the rooms in the house as the children chased each other. There were rarely any quiet moments in the Dupuis household.

Carole showed me to my room,leading me through the halls,and arriving at a white door.I instantly smiled the second I walked into the warm room. It wasn't a big room. It was extremely cozy though,with greyish blue walls,and purple comforter. The bed looked so warm and inviting,I just wanted to crawl under the heavy blankets,and sleep for days.

"I'll just leave,so you can get settled in sweetie." I thanked her as she turned to walk out of the room,and she gave me a huge smile,happy that she could help me.

I stood there like an idiot for a few more moments,staring at the bed. I finally stripped myself of my coat,shoes,hat,and gloves,leaving me in my hoodie and jeans. A content sigh escaped my lips when my head hit the fluffy pillow. I dragged the comforter up my body to my chin,creating my own cocoon of warmth. 'So this is what heaven must feel like'.

I battled my heavy eyelids for a few more moments before finally surrendering. My body melted into what felt like a cloud. My mind was no longer consumed with alarming thoughts. I was actually at peace with myself for the first time in years. I finally felt safe.

Backing away from the problem of pain you never had a home