Breathe Me

My phone was ringing, and it was ringing loud. I groaned trying to rub the sleep out of my eyes and started to look around for my phone, which seemed like an impossible task in the dark. I finally found my phone which had been hiding underneath my pillow. Without looking at the number I answered my phone. Putting a stop to the annoying ring tone Pascal had set.

“Hello?”

“GOODMORNING SUNSHINE”

I groaned, laying my head back on the pillow. “What do you want Uncle Pascal?”

“Do you think you can pick me and the guys up at the airport?”

“As much as I would love to, I'm kind of busy”

“Doing what?!”

“Trying to sleep! It's 2 in the morning, in case you haven't noticed”

“SOPHIE PLEASE, CAROL WOULDN'T PICK UP HER PHONE. IF YOU DON'T PICK US UP WE WILL FREEZE TO DEATH. DON'T YOU LOVE ME SOPHIE?”]

I cringed as he yelled loudly into the phone. I could imagine the scene he was causing at the airport.

“Fine, I will pick you up... just calm down”

“Thank you so much Sophie! I knew you wouldn't let your favourite uncle down”

“Yeah yeah. I'll be there in thirty”

I sighed as I buried myself into the warm blankets. I really didn't want to leave the warm house. I glanced over at the doggie bed I had gotten for Frankie, where he was curled up in a little ball.

“Hey Frankie, you want to go for a ride?”

The Corgi's ears perked up as I spoke. I grinned as he stood up, following me out of the warm room. I wasn't even going to bother to change out of my pajamas, considering it was a Sunday, and it was practically forbidden to change out of your pajamas on a Sunday at the Dupuis household. Frankie whimpered when I opened the door to the front yard, realizing that it was snowing.

“It's okay buddy”

I picked him up and nearly ran to Pascal's truck. As soon as I started the car I quickly blasted the heat and turned on the radio, taking my time to find a song. Frankie barked as he stared out the window on the passenger side, every now and then scratching his paws on the window and looking back at me with his large brown eyes. It took me about twice as long as I had planned to get to the airport due to the snowstorm. I smiled when I finally got to the airport and saw Pascal, Max, Jordan, and of course Kris, all standing there in the snow. It had been weeks since I saw them, and to say I missed them all was an understatement.

“Sorry it took too long to get here” I apologized to the guys as they stuffed themselves into the truck. Pascal sat in the passenger seat and immediately started laughing when Frankie tried to tackle him.

“It's no problem. This weather is crazy” Max spoke from the back of the truck.

I glanced back at them and giggled when I saw Jordan and Max trying to crush Kris up against the window, who just sat there and took it. God I had missed these guys so much. When I moved here I honestly didn't think I would make any friends, especially with a bunch of crazy hockey players.

“Do you guys want to come over later? I make breakfast on Sundays” I asked quietly.

Max gasped dramatically, immediately stopping what he was doing. “Why don't you tell us these things Pascal?! Of course we want to come over. FREE FOOD”

“Are you going to come Kris?” Pascal smirked and looked at me as he asked the question.

He chuckled “Yeah that sounds great”

I bit my lip as I drove away from the airport, trying to contain my happiness. Ever since Christmas Kris and I had basically been inseparable, we spent as much time as we could together, talking about our childhoods and just whatever else was on our mind. I didn't feel afraid anymore. I wasn't scared to open up to Kris, getting everything off my chest actually felt good.

“How are my kids doing?” Pascal asked me as he scratched Frankie's belly.

The Penguins had been gone on a road trip for two weeks, and despite all of late night calls and skype sessions, I could tell he missed his children like crazy.

“They're all good, Maeva is still having trouble with math, but I've been helping her. I took Kody to the dentist last thursday for a checkup, no cavities, and Zoe is.... well, Zoe” I chuckled.

He smiled and looked out the window, obviously excited to finally be home.

“Where do you guys even live?” I asked the three large hockey players sitting in the back of the truck.

“Oh it's okay, we can just crash at your place.” Max gave me a smug smile from his seat.

I chuckled at Pascal's terrified face. The drive back to the house took a lot longer than I wanted it to, thanks to the snow storm that was going on, making it really hard to see the road.

“Damn... I'm glad I'm not the one driving” Pascal laughed.

I rolled my eyes and let out a sigh of relief when we pulled into the garage about twenty minutes later.

'Home at last!'

“You guys can fight over the guest bedroom, I'm going to bed” Pascal said to the guys who were awkwardly standing in the living room. Max and Jordan looked at each other before bolting up the stairs, leaving just me and Kris in the same room.

“So... I guess I'm sleeping on the couch” Kris said.

I gave him a sympathetic look “I'll go get you some blankets and pillows”

****

“I feel terrible that you have to sleep on the couch. Are you sure you don't want to sleep in my room? I don't mind taking the couch...”

I smiled at her generosity “Don't worry, I don't mind sleeping on the couch. It can't be that uncomfortable”

She nodded her head, “Well if you need anything, you know where my room is”

I nodded, “Good night Sophie”

“Night Kris” she whispered softly before making her way up the stairs.

I sighed and rolled over onto my side. The couch really wasn't that bad, but it was impossible for me to fall asleep. I had a lot on my mind. I hadn't been doing so good with hockey lately, my game hasn't been good, and it had been weeks since I scored a goal, even an assist would have been fine. I rubbed my face desperately trying to clear my mind, which seemed pretty impossible knowing that Sophia was sleeping in the same house. I shake my head, surely she had been watching all of the Penguins games, most likely seeing how bad I have been playing. I tried to clear all thoughts from my mind, but I couldn't stop thinking of Sophie. I wondered what she was dreaming about...

****

“Stop crying you stupid bitch!”

I whimpered as I was thrown against the wall of my bedroom, I'm surprised I didn't put a whole in the wall with how hard my head slammed into it. I couldn't stop the tears, and I knew that made him more angry.

“Stop being such a fucking baby! I'm not even hurting you”

My left cheek suddenly stung, and I could taste the coppery liquid of blood in my mouth. He had slapped me hard, I had no idea how I was going to cover that up for school tomorrow. His dirty hands were suddenly in my hair, he pulled me up from the floor, bringing me face to face with him. He smirked as I desperately tried to not cry.

“You're the ugliest girl I have ever seen, nobody is ever going to love you” He chuckled when my face scrunched up, a useless attempt at keeping myself from crying.

“Aww it's OK little Sophie, daddy's here” He grinned as his hands trailed down to the front of my jeans.

I lost it.

“Stop it! Get your hands off of me!” I thrashed around wildly, trying to get out of his tight grasp.

His eyes darkened “It's OK Sophie, I'll take care of you” He picked my small body up with ease, throwing me onto the bed, his heavy body was suddenly on top of me, nearly suffocating me. He laughed as I struggled to breath, he laughed at the hot tears that were pouring out of my eyes, he laughed at how much pain I was in.

“Don't make me tie you to the bed sweetie” He laughed.

He shoved his hands down my jeans and I screamed louder, trying to do anything to keep him from raping me.

I wasn't strong enough.

“Sophia wake up!”

I shot up, cold sweat was dripping down my forehead and I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. I took one look at Pascal's face before breaking down. I wrapped my arms around his neck and started to cry.

“Please don't cry, it was just a nightmare...” Pascal tried to comfort me without any success.

I sobbed harder, “He was... I tried to... He- oh my god”

Pascal buried his face into my shoulder, and I wasn't quite sure, but I think he might have cried a little. He knew who the nightmare had been about.

“I need a glass of water” My voice was shaking as I got up from the bed, my whole body was shaking.

“Do you want me to stay up with you until you fall asleep?”

I rubbed my eyes, trying to get the tears under control. I merely shook my head, not trusting my voice.

“If you need anything just tell me, okay?”

I gave him a tiny smile,nodding my head. We both walked out of the bedroom, parting our ways when I walked down the stairs. I made my way into the kitchen, squinting my eyes at the refrigerator light as I opened the door. I grabbed a cold water, and sat down on one of the chairs at the island. I could feel my face scrunching up, something I did on instinct to keep from crying. I took large gulps of the cold water, trying to swallow the lump in my throat. The terrifying images of that night consumed my mind. I folded my arms and rested my head on top of them, staring out the window up at the full moon. The moon got blurry as I tried to keep the tears from falling.

“Hey, what's wrong?”

I jumped at the heavy French-Canadian accent, “You need to stop doing that” I chuckled

He frowned, “What do you mean”

I rubbed my eyes, “Always catching me at my worst moments”

He didn't say anything for a few moments, “Do you want to talk?”

“There's really nothing to talk about. Just a bad dream is all...”

“I could hear you crying from all the way down here, it must have been pretty bad”

“Yeah i-it was” My voice broke and I quickly looked away from Kris, rubbing my eyes.

I let out a bitter chuckle “ look at me, crying over something that happened 4 years ago. I'm such a baby” I was angry.

I was angry at the fact that I was still crying over this asshole.

“It's okay to cry. You've been through so much”

“I'm just sick of it. I don't want to cry anymore, it's all I've been doing my whole life. I just want to be happy”

“You can't be happy if you keep feeling sorry for yourself”

I stared at him for a moment, his brown eyes making eye contact with mine. His words were running through my mind like crazy. I didn't know what to say.

“You deserve to be happy Sophia, and I know that may seem impossible with everything you've been through, but you have to stop letting the past bring you down.

I quickly got up, nearly tackling him to the floor when I wrapped my arms around him. Without even hesitating he returned the hug, his arms wrapped tightly around me. My eyes closed and I snuggled into his warm body.

“You will be happy one day Sophia, I promise.”

As tears continued to pour out my eyes, I found that hard to believe. His large hands gently rubbed my back, it was comforting to me. I pulled away lightly, realizing how close his face was to mine. He lifted his hand to my face, his fingers lightly brushing away the tears.

“What makes you happy?” I asked softly

He smiled, his hand cupped my cheek “Hockey, friends, family... You”

I blushed as he said the last one. His thumb gently rubbed the spot right below my eye, catching the last of my tears. I found myself smiling, forgetting about the nightmare. His hand dropped and he wrapped both of his arms tightly around my waist, his forehead rested against mine.

My arms were suddenly around his neck, my hands playing with his hair. He brought me closer to him, and then he kissed me.

She stands at the shoreline,
With hands in the air,
Her words pierce the dark night
"Does anyone care?"
And all along they're saying
"Help is on the way"
But it never came...