Wake Up

Still Billie's P.O.V-

Now I have totally lost track of time, and have no idea how long I have been sitting still for; all I know is its been a long fucking time, and I worry that the doctors are about to give up on me. If I had to guess I would say I have been in here for at lest 4 months and the same thing happens every day. The same nurse comes in four times a day and checks "my vitals," and walks away. Then the doctor comes in with my wife Adrienne, and he tells her the same old news, " He is still having the same amount of brain activity, and I'm sorry to say there has been little change.' and he always gives Adrienne the option of pulling the plug; and her response is always, " I wont give up on him." She then sits near me and holds my hand tight and gives me the low down on my two boys. God I miss them so much, I just want nothing more to hold my son's again even though in reality they are bigger then me now. She then always crawls in my bed and lies her head down on my shoulder and goes to sleep.

Today was no different, but Adrienne was more I don't know how to put it exactly, I could just tell she wasn't herself. She did tell me about Joey and Jakob's day, and she then puts her head on my shoulder, but when she lifted my hand to her cheek I felt a little drip of water hit my hand. I know she can't hear me but I still said this anyway.

B.J. - " Oh baby please don't cry, I'm here, I know you can't hear me but I'm here baby. Oh don't cry, your going make me cry, (yeah if I could, I would have)."

Adrienne - " Oh Billlie, just give me a sign, any sign, just let me know your in there, please!"

B.J. - " I would if I could baby, I can't, but please I'm here!"

I felt her get off the bed, and heard her pacing around the room. I also heard the sobs coming from the women I love, Adrienne is at her braking point.

Adrienne - " Billie, I can't do this anymore! I don't need you to wake, well that would be nice, but all I need is a little movement, or even to just see your chest move on its own; that's all I need. Billie I can't ever believe that you would ever want me to pull the plug, but how long am I suppose to wait, if I just got one sign it will give me more hope."

I can't believe she is considering pulling the plug on me, and what if I can't give her a sign, will she really give up on me?

I felt her take me hand again, and she kissed it in a apologetic form; and I knew she regretted what she just said.

Adrienne - " I'm sorry Billie, I didn't mean that, oh god I would never be able to....(she started crying and she hugged me.) I don't know why, but I feel like you can hear me, no, I know you can hear me, and I just need that small favor form you; just to see that there is hope left."

I fought with the stiffness that was holding me down on this bed, but no matter how much I tried nothing would budge. I wanted to make my hand move so badly, I never wanted something so bad in my life. You can take away my money, take away the fame, do anything you must, I just need that hand to move to show the most important thing in my life that I am still here. As most know I'm no God believer, but if there is one, I will go to hell and suffer for all entirety, I just want my hand to move.

Then something amazing happened, yeah I know it seems like a fake thing coming out of a love story but it happened, I was able to make my hand squeeze her hand. she didn't respond, I had no idea how long I have been trying to get my hand to move, but it must have been all night because I felt the sun warming my face and Adrienne didn't move. I squeezed her hand again this time I was able to do it a little harder and I felt her head come off of my chest.

Adrienne - " Oh my god, Billie! Honey can you squeeze my hand again, baby if you can hear me please squeeze my hand again!"

I felt the stiffness in my hand become louse, and the weight was no longer there. I squeezed her hand again, and I felt this weight come off my chest and I said a quick thank you to the man up stairs. Adrienne kissed my hand so many times I lost count, and with every kiss I returned it with a squeeze.

Adrienne- " I knew you heard me, I promise we will get you threw this, can you move your other hand?"

She took my other hand and I felt the same weight lift off my right hand and I squeezed her hand again. Now she knows I'm in here and I'm just trapped at the moment; and I will find a way out of this.

Adrienne - " Billie I'm going to go get the nurse, I'll be right back."

Before she left she leaned in and kissed my hand again, and I once again squeezed her hand.