Let Me Be The One To Save You

I wandered through the streets of Belleville as I did every school day when the weather was good. It had been two weeks since I was supposed to start attending Belleville High and I had yet to go once. I didn't feel ready yet. So, instead, I spent my days exploring the town, anything to avoid the daunting high school.

It was a Monday and it felt like any other day, except it was my birthday. I had just turned seventeen but, it was no different from any other day, except I had received a few presents.
From my Aunt and Uncle I had received money and a book entitled 'Ballads of Suburbia' ; from my boyfriend, Aidan, back in Ireland, I had received a beautiful, green velvet, sketchbook and a really cheesy card; my friend, Rachel had sent me a silver bracelet with a few charms on it and a heartfelt letter. But from my mother, I had received nothing- I had never felt so unloved and unwanted.

I strolled down a small side street I had yet to explore and came across a small blue coffee shop. I decided that, since it was my birthday, I would treat myself to a nice coffee and maybe even a cake.
The door made a jingling noise as I entered and the one worker behind the counter looked up and smile at me. He was blonde with pretty green eyes.

"G'morning, how can I help you?" He asked me politely.

"Uhm. . . Can I get a tall caramel machiato and a chocolate chip cookie please?" I asked quietly.

"'Course you can darling," He replied and flashed me another smile that lit up his eyes.

He began making my coffee and I stared off into space, thinking about my mom and Fergal. It was my first birthday without my best friend and my mom hadn't even acknowledged that her only daughter was another year older.

"Hey, you look too young to not be in school. What gives?" The young coffee shop worker's voice brought me out of my thoughts.

I shrugged, "I'm new to town and it's my birthday. I'm allowed take the day off."

His eyes lit up and he grinned widely at me, "Happy birthday. . . ?"

"Oh my name is Ciara," I told him.

"Lucas," he replied and wiped his hand on his apron before extending it to me. We shook hands. "Nice to meet you."

"Likewise."

He finished making my drink and placed my cookie on a plate before handing both to me.

"How much is this?" I asked him pulling my Jack Skellington purse out of my bag.

He shook his head and waved my money away, "Don't worry about it. It's my treat for your birthday."

"Thank you," I smiled at his kindness.

"It's fine," He replied, returning my smile. "Oh and if you want my advice, if you don't want to be spotted by adults, sit in the corner by the bookshelves."

He pointed to a comfy looking couch that was located behind an oak coffee table and a cluttered bookshelf. It was slightly hidden from the entrance- the perfect hiding place.

"Thanks."

"No problem," He winked and sent me off with a shooing motion.

I was drawing in peace for more than two hours before another customer entered the coffee shop that I had decided would be my new week day home. The bell above the door rang and curiosity got the better of me. I peered around the edge of the bookcase.
It was him. The guy I had seen exiting the Toro house that second day of school. He was standing with his back to me, at the register, but I knew it was him. He leaned casually against the hardtop counter as he chatted to Lucas who was preparing his drink.
After he received his drink he turned around and I could confirm that it was the same guy. No one else could be as beautiful as him.

He surveyed his surroundings for a moment or two before making his way to table. His was was slightly feminine, a girlish sway to his curvy hips. He settled into a couch practically opposite to where I was sitting and I found my eyes being automatically drawn to him. He was sketching something and occasionally taking a sip of the drink in his mug.

He had been sitting there for at least an hour, his coffee now long gone, but he was still drawing. I didn't think he had noticed my staring until he looked up. A smile graced his features as he caught my eye.
I blushed fiercely and looked down to begin packing up my stuff. I got up and all but ran out the door, saying a good bye to Lucas on my way.



I sat on my bed in the darkening room. I had been sitting like this for a while and was too lazy to get up and turn on the light.

"Hey Ferg," I found myself whispering to the photo me and him that I held in my hands. "It's my birthday today. Seventeen. An age you'll never get to be. Things aren't getting any easier without you dude."

I exhaled loudly and stared at the photo. It had been taken a week before Fergal had taken his life. We were at our friend Rachel's seventeenth party- she was the eldest in our small group of friends. Ferg and I were sitting in front of the window, cars racing by behind us. I had my left hand twined with Aidan's but my gaze was on Fergal, laughing as he eyed up Rachel's male cousin who was seated behind him.

"You never even had the chance to have a real boyfriend," I mumbled as I traced his mischievous face. "You should've had that at least."

Fergal had only come out in January two years ago. He was not ashamed of it, but neither did he flaunt it. He was just himself, a quality I'd always admired in him.

"You deserved a handsome boyfriend. Someone who'd compliment your own good looks."

My mind drifted to the handsome guy I had now seen twice. Fergal would've been the person I'd have called when I got home, to talk about him and even now, things weren't much different.

"I saw a hot guy today, but before you ask, no, I did not talk to him," I giggled a little. "I can't talk to guys, you know that."

I lay back on my bed, the photo still in my grasp. I stared into Fergal's emerald green eyes that were alight with mischief and, for just one moment, I could pretend he was still alive. That he was lying beside in my bed, as he had done so often when he was alive.

"Love you smelly," I laughed softly. "Please watch over me and our friend, we need you guidance."