Lessons Learned

The rush of the hallways, the noise of the student body as it pulses around me with life, the predictable schedule. Everything is finally returning to 'normal'. My friends attack me as if they hadn't seen me in forever- even though they'd come over to visit me some days ago. Submerging myself back into the grapevine and getting caught up in the meaningless gossip of tomorrows old news, I can feel his eyes on me whenever I pass his classroom.

They follow my every move, trying to see past my facade of my supposed complete recovery. I act like I don't see the jealousy reflecting in his eyes when someone talks to me. I pretend not to notice the way he balls his fists when a fellow classmate gets just a little too close. But the truth is the fact that he's getting so riled up is making me want to tease him all the more.

Leaning against the wall I flirt with Johnsted as he trades his text books for his next class. From the corner of my eye I can see Vias standing in the doorway with his arms crossed, doing a pretty good job at acting friendly to the students who're arriving for his next class. Flicking my eyes to meet his once before returning my attention to Johnny boy I give a him a backwards salute.

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The rowdiness of my friends has gotten us two warnings from the aids already but we weren't worried about getting detentions. Who in their right mind would be bitchy enough to make kids stay after school just because they were having a good time? Sipping my skim milk and prodding the food on my tray with a plastic fork- the school doesn't trust us with actual silverware- I ask Emilia why we didn't use our off-school grounds privileges.

"What are we doing wasting our time eating this?"

She rolls her eyes and points out on how I'd been the one who'd been reluctant to go in the first place. Cringing I sit back in my seat and fold my arms, pouting partly because of that, but mostly because I'm restraining myself from going up to see Vias. When I'd stopped by earlier two stupid sophomores had come around asking for some 'help' with their homework.

I'd been leery to go since a flashback of how our study session had gone not that long ago had popped into my mind. But Vias had just waved me off saying with a bit of a bite, "Go play with your friends Parker. You seemed to be holding up on your own."

Giving a dramatic sigh I have about twenty different people asking me what's wrong. Making up an excuse of how I'm feeling a little sick- not that far off considering I'm sick to my stomach with worry about how those girls could be seducing him right this second- I get up from the table. Waving off a little over half a dozen who volunteer to come with me, I quickly toss my barely touched lunch into the trash and go upstairs.

I can hear them in the hallway, a girl's flirtatious laughter and playful comments such as "You're so funny Mr. Littela!" Stopping just outside the doorway I listen to their friendly- too friendly if you ask me- banter back and forth I find myself afraid to move.

"So if I take this and divide it by that then I'll get the answer?"

"No. See you have to take this- What do you think you're doing?"

Straining to hear her response I can only make out the words, "like you". Pressing a hand to the wall I try to hear Vias's response. He starts to say something but his words are cut off. Unable to stay still any longer I peek around the doorway and see a girl- who knows where the other one had gone- practically sitting on his lap. Stunned I don't know whether to tear her off him and tell him he's my bitch man or run.

Choosing the latter I turn to go before they notice me, only to run smack dab into the other girl. She cries out indignantly from the ground and I hear movement in the classroom. Muttering an apology I take off down the hallway just as I hear Vias Mr. Littela calling my name.

But I just ignore him.

After school

"Hey Parker can you come over?"

Giving Nash an apologetic smile I tell him that I'm still supposed to take it easy.

"Maybe next week?"

He looks a little dejected but says quickly, "Sure!"

After talking to couple of other people I hear my name being called over the intercom system. Even with everyone's mind on going home or getting to their sports practice a good portion of them stop and say, "Oooo." Some of the guys yell, "Get some!"

Rolling my eyes I head to the math room where I see Mr. Littela waiting for me at his desk. Closing the door and hearing the click I go over but stay on the opposite side of it.

"Something you wanted to tell me?"

He leans forward.

"About this afternoon-"

"Don't."

Holding up my hands I just say, "It's fine. A misunderstanding I'm sure."

I wait for him to say something but when he doesn't I move towards the door. With one hand on the door handle I say over my shoulder, "See you at home."

Quicker than I had thought possible- though it's not like he's all that much older than I am- his hands are on either side of me, pinning me against the door. Turning around I can see his eyes are searching mine for some kind of clue for where I stand with what I had seen. But I don't know what to think of it.

He's not the kind to cheat- although try to explain the situation with Hallie. It's not like he was expecting there to be more than one student who was so blunt with their feelings at a school like this. Hell he probably doesn't even see why so many high schoolers are all over him.

"Nothing happened Parker. Nothing was going to happen. I-"

Kissing him I break it off just to whisper to him, "I know."

He hugs me so tightly I'm afraid he's going to crush me. But then his hand slips to my waist and the other pulls my head back so he can kiss me again. Lips trailing down my neck I hear him murmur, "I was afraid you'd leave me."

I wish I didn't have to.

"That you'd refuse to hear me out."

Every word you speak either shoots me to the moon or condemns me to the sun. How could I not listen to you? You've come to mean so much to me. More than I had ever thought someone could…

Wrapping my arms around his neck I reply softly, "As long as it is you who's speaking, I'll always listen."

His hand grasps my wrist and drags it down to the bulge in his pants. Quietly he moans, "Fuck I want you."

The heaviness of his breath, the passion in his kiss, the heat radiating from his body tells me that what he's saying is true. That finally someone wants me for me; and not just for the person who they see as me.

Smiling I undo the buttons and unzip his jeans. Slipping my hand into the waistband of his boxers and grab the heated flesh of his sex. Dropping to my knees I pull down his jeans to his feet and his boxers to his ankles. Taking his shaft I tease the tip a little before deep throating him. After running my tongue along the flesh for a while I look up to see his face. I can feel him starting to cum.

"Enough Parker… Let go… "

His back arches slightly and sucking a little harder he tells me that I don't have to. If I didn't have his dick in mouth I'd tell him that I want to.

Choking slightly on his seed he pulls my up and presses me up against the wall. His leg slips between mine. Our kisses are hot and wet. His hands strip me of my own clothes and it's like knowing what to do without ever being told. By some miracle we make it back to his desk and just like the first time he sweeps aside all of the things that litter his desk, where some fall to the floor without a sound or with a small crash.

Giggling like a school boy as he lays me down on it I part my legs further. He smirks and mutters, "lewd little fiend aren't you?" Ripping off his tie he wraps it around my wrists and holds them above my head. His eyes are filled with the rawest of animalistic emotions.

Flinching a little as he starts to prepare me for entrance I listen to the words he's murmuring. Maybe it's because we're the only ones in the room, or the fact that we could be walked in on at any given moment, that his words seem to hit me deeper than ever.

"I promise to never let you go."

"I'll always protect you."

"I love you."

I even start to believe them.

When we join it's as if I forget everything. Feeling him move inside me, a forever changing rhythm, and when he cums inside me I feel as if he's the one who can make me whole again.

But after cleaning up the mess love we made, and as we're walking out to his car together, hand in hand, I can't help but think: how can he when I never was?