The Other Side of the World

“You got everything?” Zach said as he unloaded the trunk and handed me my luggage. “London is too far to be sending anything you forgot here to you.”

“Funny. And yes I have everything.” I kissed him on the cheek. “Please be sure to have everything at the apartment when I get back.”

“Of course.” He paused for a second. “Bug, are you going to be okay? I just…”

“Z…” I cut him off before he could say anything else. “I’m going to be okay. If anything, I will take the next flight back home okay? Please don’t worry too much about me. I’ll call every day, I promise.”

We hugged so tightly, we could have broken each other. Cameron, Nathan, and Michael all jumped out of the car to say goodbye as well.

“Here.” Cameron handed me my ticket and pulled me in for a hug. “Be careful okay? The boys don’t know you’re coming, but their manager knows. I kept it as a surprise. So please be careful?”

“All of you guys please stop worrying. I’m going to be okay.” I gave all of them their last hugs before heading away.

“Bug!” Zach called after me. I stopped and turned as he ran up to me. “Follow your heart okay? Always follow it. Ignore everything else. Ignore what I’ve said, what Cameron has said, ignore everything but your heart. You’ve always known what’s best for you. And I’ve protected you long enough. Do what you have to do and don’t be afraid. I love you and I want what’s best for you. And I want you to be happy.”

I gave him a kiss on the cheek and hugged him once again. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me Zach Porter. You’re my best friend and nothing and no one can ever change that.” I pulled away look straight into his eyes, “I’ll see you in a week and a half. I promise you.”

This was the first time I ever walked away from anyone. And it was scary. I’m so used to having everything leaving me behind and walking away from me.

This was the first time I ever got to do it. And something inside of me said I would be back. But for some reason I was hoping something or someone would have me staying in London for a while…

--

“Hey guys! I’m back.” I started to type on my blog. “I know I haven’t been updating a lot but it’s just been a really busy summer. If you guys follow me on twitter you would know. Well anyway, I’m on a plane right now off to a place I’m not allowed to say just yet. But all I’m going to say is that it’s probably one of the longest plane rides I’ve ever been on. But all I wanted to say was that recently and lately a lot has been going on. Around this time in 2 weeks I will be on my own, in my own apartment, alone. Doesn’t seem like that big of a deal does it?

Well let me let you in on a little secret. I’ve never been alone before. At least not in the way I will be alone. I’ve always had someone there. I’ve always had someone with me. And now… even right now, I’m off somewhere all alone. And I’m scared.

I think a lot of the time when we start to grow up a lot of the things we wished for as a kid, like moving out, having our own rules, things like that never really hit us until the moment it really happens.

I’ve always had someone there for me. I’ve always had someone taking care of me, but now it’s not like that. Now I have to grow up, I have to do things for myself. I do live by my own rules. And for once I have the change to make myself happy.

I’m so used to always trying to make everyone else around me happy. Doing things because they said so, or because that’s the way they want it.

Basically what I’m trying to say is that when you grow up, and it’s time for you to do things on your own don’t be scared like I am. Don’t be afraid to just live your own life. Don’t let other people take it over, because you’re the only one who knows what’s best for you.

Zach told me today to follow my heart. As cliché has that sounds, he’s right. I’ve never really followed my heart before, and well I’m not really happy with my life am I? No not really.

I think, yes, sometimes you do have to listen to the logic of things and your brain provides that. But a lot of the time you have to take the chance and not be afraid anymore and just listen to your heart.

Let your guard down and listen to your heart.”

I slowly closed the lid of my laptop. While resting my head on the back of my seat, I closed my eyes and sighed. With 7 hours left of my flight, all I could do is wait.

--

The fight seemed faster than I expected, well considering the fact that I slept through half of it. Anyway, I arrived around 2pm at London Heathrow Airport. I pretty much looked like an idiot walking out because I had no idea what the hell I was doing.

After getting all of my luggage, I headed to the nearest restroom to freshen up. That flight beat me up pretty well. I changed into a new outfit, fixed my hair, and touched up my makeup. “There you go, much better.” I said to myself.

I got out and looked around trying to figure out what to do next, but I was hopeless.

Then suddenly I came across and older man, a driver actually, holding a sign that said “Kaylin Anderson”.

“Excuse me sir. Uhm… I’m Kaylin Anderson.” I said walking up to him.

“Well Miss Anderson, welcome to London!” He politely said shaking my hand. “Can I get your bags for you?”

“Uh… yes, thank you.” I said still in shock. “May I ask, uhm… why are you picking me up?”

He laughed to himself. “Miss, I’m your driver for your trip. Erm, Mr. Porter is it? He requested me to take care of you while you are here.”

“He would,” I said to myself. “Oh. Well thank you. What’s your name by the way?”

He put all my luggage into the back of the car. “You can call me Gorgie.” He opened up the door gesturing me to get in.

“Well it’s a pleasure meeting you Gorgie, and thank you.” I smiled at him.

I sat in the car looking around the foreign place. “So where to first Miss Anderson?”

“Oh please call me Kaylin.” I said still distracted.

“Kaylin, where would you like to take you first? The O2 arena? Or your hotel?”

“What?”

“Your hotel or the arena to see Mr. Payne?”

“How did you…?”

“Mr. Porter filled me in on everything. That man was very precise on me keeping an eye on you.”

“Oh Zach. Uh. Well…. I think to the arena then.”

We drove off and I swear my heart was beating out of my chest. But I was so mesmerized by everything around me. I stared out the window not even taking a blink. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. The buildings, the people, the weather, just everything was amazing to me.

“Kaylin, We’re here.” I was so distracted I didn’t even notice we had arrived.

“Thank you Gorgie.. Uh…” I opened the door awkwardly not knowing what else to do.

“Wait. Here.” He handed me a cell phone.

“What’s this?”

“Provided by Mr. Uh…. Quiseng is it? Him and Mr. Porter set up everything for you. This is your cell phone for your trip. My number is set there. So are their numbers.” He laughed. “Also the hotel’s.”

“Gosh, this is embarrassing.”

“I’m guessing they just care, that’s all. Call me when you’re ready to be picked up yeah? I’ll bring your stuff back to your hotel and I’ll stay close by. Take as long as you need.”

“Thanks again Gorgie. I’ll see you later.” I shut the door and headed for arena. It was a nice hot sunny day in London. There were tons of fans waiting outside. so many security and workers.

Gorgie rolled down the window and yelled out “Kaylin! Their manager is expecting you. Just say your name at the door.” I smiled at him and waved goodbye. “Go get ‘em!” He said as he drove off.

I awkwardly walked up to the man at the door. “Name please?” He said with his deep emotionless voice.

“Kaylin Anderson.”

“Here.” He handed me a VIP lanyard. “Just right through there. They’ve been waiting for you.”

“Thank you.” My heart was pounding and my hands were shaking. I saw their manager not too far from the venue entrance.

“Kaylin!” He ran up to me giving me a warm welcome with a hug. “I hope your flight was okay. The boys are just finishing up their sound check. They don’t know you are here. So just walked down to the stage.” He opened the doors to the entire arena.

My heart was about to explode. All you can see was thousands of empty seats upon empty seats. It was crazy. I’ve never seen anything like it. “Thank you.” I said. “It was really great seeing you again!”

I was so far away from the stage; they couldn’t see me just yet. But I could see them.

They were all up on stage just finishing Forever Young, the last song of their set. I slowly kept walking as I watched them on the stage goofing around yet getting the sound check done.

So many thoughts were running through my head. I just didn’t know what to do with myself. I felt so out of place. I felt like I didn’t belong.

Everything was just happening so fast. I kept walking and I just kept getting closer.

The boys finally finished their song then all of a sudden I saw a couple of people run up on stage. Hannah was there. She ran up to Louis.

Rebecca was there for the day to support Zayn and the boys.

Then there, right there, my heart stopped. It was Danielle. It was like all slow motion for me. She ran up to Liam, he slowly lingered his hand on her arm until it met her hand, interlocking their hands together. And well then, she pulled in to give him a kiss on the cheek. He looked happy. She looked happy. Everyone looked really happy. I had chills run though out my entire body.

At this point I kind of just stood there. I honestly didn’t know what to do. I was in shock, I was confused, I was upset, and my heart felt like it got ripped out of my chest.

“Is that Kaylin?” Shit, shit, shit, I said to myself. It was Harry. Not even realizing how close I was to the stage, he spotted me. “Kaylin Anderson?” He yelled into the microphone.

I gave him a shy wave.

“No fucking way!” He dropped his microphone, jumping off stage and ran towards me, with Niall not too far behind and everyone else following.

He ran and hugged me, practically almost knocking me over. “Hi Harry.”

“What are you even doing here?” He pulled away letting in Niall to hug me.

“Surprise?” I laughed to myself awkwardly. “Cameron and Zach sent me out here for a week and a half as a gift before I start school.

I made my rounds saying hi to Zayn and Louis as they introduced me to Rebecca and Hannah. Then I finally got to Liam.

At that moment I noticed he distanced himself from Danielle, and also from me. The tension in the entire arena was felt through everyone. You could cut it with a knife. The rest of the boys were all holding their breaths as Liam and I locked eyes.

“Hi.” I simply said to him.

“Hello.” He said biting his lip, quickly looking away.

--
Liam’s POV
--

The moment I heard Harry say Kaylin I pushed Danielle away. I know that wasn’t the best thing to do, but I don’t know… I was some kind of reflex or something.

When I saw her walking towards the stage, I didn’t know exactly what to feel. I thought I would never see her again. And now she was standing right in front of me more beautiful than ever.

I looked at her. Her hair was a bit longer, she had gotten a little bit thinner, but she looked good. Her arms were still covered in bracelets, hiding her scars; I was worried to see new ones though. I realized she was wearing the yellow ribbon and the gold bracelet I left her. I would have thought she took those off by now.

I was confused and in shock. She stood in front of me only saying “Hi” and yet I felt like it was just me and her in the entire room. It was like time stopped and nothing else matter but me and her.

I watched as her eyes shifted to Danielle, and in that second we were back into reality. I saw as everything from her eyes to her body language showed that her heart had broken into a million pieces.

I thought I was done breaking her heart. I thought I was done hurting her when I left.

Things just became so unexpected. Everything was so perfect for weeks… Now it just got even more complicated.

It was awkward. No one was saying anything. I couldn’t even find the words to even introduce Danielle to her.

The unfinished business between Kaylin and I just surfaced again and everyone knew it.

“I’ts…. Uh…. Nice seeing you again.” I finally said.

She looked back at me. “Yeah, you too.” She found a way to lock eyes with me once again. “Looks like a lot has changed.”

The tone of her voice and the sadness in her eyes pierced my heart with pain.