The Other Side of the World

I followed the lads into her room, hesitating on seeing her. I walked in and found her trying to find ways to get out.

“Kaylin stop it, you aren’t allowed to get out of bed.” Zach was saying to her as he was trying to get her settled in.

“I don’t want to be here. I want to go home.”

“Kaylin, stop it.” He tried to calm her down. Her eyes looked heavy. She was pale and just looked completely drained.

Everyone watched as she tried to fight Zach and Cameron. I couldn’t take it, so I walked out before I saw anything else. At that moment I could have just broken down myself.

My heart was heavy with anger and sadness. Angry at myself for what happened and upset that it had to come to this. She needed me and I walked out, that’s all I could think. The night I left her kept replaying in my head. Along with seeing Harry on the floor with her in his arms covered in blood.

I didn’t want to be there. I wanted to turn back time and just change everything. I wish I could have just stayed with her that night. I wish I never walked away.

My thoughts were interrupted by all the lads standing around me. “Liam, are you okay?” Harry said trying to get my attention.

“I shouldn’t have left her that night.” I said quietly under my breath.

“Oh mate,” Zayn put his hand on my shoulder, “You couldn’t have stopped this. We all knew she was more screwed up than we thought.”

“But it’s because of me!” I quickly jerked my arm away from him. “You don’t understand, I knew. I knew how screwed up she was. I knew perfectly well how bad it was. But she was okay!” I paused to calm myself down. “She was okay when I left her… or at least I thought she was.”

“What happened last night isn’t your fault Liam.” Niall said trying to reassure me.

Louis agreed, “Yeah man, you gotta stop blaming yourself for it.”

“I told her I didn’t want to be with her; that I was happy with Danielle. I told her I didn’t love her anymore.” Things got quiet quickly as everyone tried to process the words I just told them. “I told her she should have never come to see me.”

I looked at all of them and none of them could make any eye contact with me. Reason being that a little part of them knew and believed that I was truly partly to blame for why we were in that hospital, for why Kaylin was in that hospital bed.

“Hey guys,” we all shifted ourselves to look down the hall to find Zach walked up to us. He was a complete mess.

“How’s she doing?” Harry asked.

“She’s okay, for the most part I guess.”

Things quickly got awkward as none of us knew what to say.

“Uhm...” Zach finally spoke up. “I’m taking her back with me the moment she’s able to leave here.”

We all nodded in agreement. We all knew that was the best.

“But uh…” He started to rub the back of his neck and tried not to make eye contact. “I want you guys to say your goodbyes tomorrow.”

“Okay that’s fine.” I agreed.

“But after we leave. After we’re back in America, I don’t want you guys to have any contact with Kaylin what so ever.”

The boys and I looked at each other in shock. “Zach, you can’t do that.” Harry spoke up.

“I’m not doing this because I’m angry, or because I’m upset. I’m doing this for her.” He looked up at us. “She is the most important thing to me; the most important thing. And I made a promise to take care of her. And now look at her. All bandaged up. She almost killed herself!” His voice started to get louder.

Cameron ran out of her room straight towards Zach to hold him back. His eyes were all puffy and red from all the crying. “Come on Zach, Kaylin is asking for you. Go. I’ll finish it off here.” He led him back to the room before continuing with us.

“He can’t do that Cameron. He can’t just cut us out of her life like that.” I said in a panic.

“Look, when we get back to California, Zach requested to put everything on hold.”

“What do you mean?” Niall questioned.

“The band is going to take a break.”

“What does that have to do with Kaylin?” Harry asked anxiously.

“Zach talked to his parents and they’re putting her in for treatment. They’re going to get her help. He’s constantly blaming himself for what happened. He keeps telling himself that he should have known. That he should have gotten her help that night he found out, but he didn’t and now it was almost too late.”

We all got quiet.

“So I ask you to please respect his decision. He’s not doing it because he blames you for what happened, he doing it because he cares a lot about her. And he thinks with sometime away to get things back on track; she’s going to be okay again.”

“So now what?” Zayn asked.

“Go back to the hotel and come back tomorrow. Get some rest. We’ve got it covered here.”

“I don’t want to leave her.” I said hesitating as the lads started to walk away.

“Liam, none of this is your fault okay. If anything, this is mine. I started this. So please, go back to your hotel and get some rest. You can see her in the morning. And if anything happens, we’ll call you.”

“Come on Liam.” Harry grabbed a hold of me and practically dragged me out of the hospital.

--
The next day
--

*knock, knock*
I came up to Kaylin’s room, palms all sweaty with my heart beating out of my chest. “Kay?” I walked in to find her still in her hospital gown and standing next to the window.

“There’s a lot of paparazzi out there.” She said without looking at me.

“Kaylin, you aren’t supposed to be out of bed. Come on.” I grabbed her by the waist not risking touching her arms. “You know you aren’t supposed to be walking around.”

“It’s just a couple reopened scars, Liam.” I glared at her. “Sorry, too soon?”

“It’s always going to be too soon.” I took a seat on her bed as she sat up not giving me eye contact.

“They’re sending me away aren’t they?”

“Oh Kaylin, I don’t know.”

“I heard them talking. They’re putting me in for treatment when I get home.”

“Yeah, they are Kay.”

“Great. I’m going to be a crazy person.”

“You’re not crazy, babe.” I paused for a second. “You’re not okay?” I lifted her head to look at me. “I have something to tell you.”

“What?” She said impatiently.

I grabbed her hand not really knowing the reaction I’d get from her. “I broke things off with Danielle the other night. The night we got stuck in the elevator.”

A weak smile came across her face. “So what does that mean?”

“Well here’s another thing. You get to go back to California tomorrow morning. So we’re here to say goodbye.” As that was said Niall, Harry, Zayn, and Louis walked into the room.

“So that’s just it? You guys say goodbye and I go back to the other side of the word to get put into the loony bin? Awesome.”

“Kaylin it’s not like that.” Harry said.

“Then what? I’m getting forced to leave here; I’m getting locked up for a couple months. How is this even right?” She was getting angry.

“Kaylin stop it.” I grabbed her by her arms realizing I was holding her by the bandages. I quickly let go in a panic.

“Kaylin,” Niall spoke up. “This is a good thing.”

“How is it even remotely good?”

“You need help Kay,” I said to her as my eyes started to swell up with tears. “You more help than you think. I can’t help you, Zach can’t help you. No one in your life right now can help you.”

She pushed away from her and quickly ran towards the door. Harry stopped her holding her by her shoulders before she could make it out the door.

“Look at me Kaylin.” Her head was towards the ground. I couldn’t bare look at what was happening, but I knew I had to. “Look at me right now.” She looked up with tears running down her face. Harry was holding her at arm’s length at her shoulders. Looking straight into her eyes he said, “Kaylin, you listen to me. You almost died. I had you covered in blood in my arms that night. Don’t you dare think we don’t love or care about you! We almost lost you that night. Kaylin, please just accept this help. We only want what’s best for you, even if we can never see you again.”

Kaylin dropped into his arms and cried hysterically. He held her as he cried with her. He gestured for me to take her, so I did. I was so weak I didn’t know if I could hold the both of us up. But I led her back to the bed and lay with her. She laid in my arms crying, and I did the same.

“Come on guys.” Harry said wiping his eyes dry. “Let’s give these two sometime alone.”

We both cried until there weren’t any more tears to cry.

“I had this dream.” She spoke up sniffling and wiping her cheeks dry.

“Okay well tell me about it.” We situated ourselves until we were comfortable. I had my right arm around her as she laid her head on my shoulder and played with my hands.

She went on with telling me about her dream. “I can’t remember it much. I know I was in the house I grew up in. But I also remember seeing my dad. It was really good seeing my dad again.”

“Go on.”

“We talked. And it just felt… I don’t know, it felt real I guess.” She looked up at me and I just smiled. “Maybe I am crazy.”

“No Kaylin, you aren’t. So what else happen?”

“He told me that I could stay there with him. Or go back here I guess. But it was like he gave me that choice but he never really wanted me to stay with him at all. It’s like when I woke up, I saw Zach. Like I really chose to come back.”

“I’m glad you came back.” I kissed her forehead.

“Yeah me too.” She said still playing with my hands.

“Does it hurt?” I took my finger tip and gently touched her bandages from one end to the other.

“Only when I think about it.”

The nurse walked in with Harry, Niall, Zayn, Louis, Zach, and Cameron following here. “Sorry to interrupt guys, but Kaylin has to rest some more so she can leave in the morning.”

“Give them a couple minutes?” Zach asked her. She nodded with approval. Cameron and Zach followed her out of the room.

I helped Kaylin out of bed so she could say goodbye to the boys. It was hard on all of us, but we knew what was best for her. She made her way to Niall, Zayn, and Louis, and then when she got to Harry, I could see it in the both of them how close they really had gotten in just that one day.

“Until we meet again.” He smiled at her and pulled her in for a hug.

“Thank you for everything H.”

“Before I go, you need to sign this.” He held out his casted wrist and a permanent marker.

“Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry for this.” She laughed.

“Just sign it.”

As she did, she read it aloud. “Thanks for the advice and that killer kiss. Don’t you ever forget me. With love, the one who put you in this cast – Kaylin Marie.” She winked at him and gave him one last hug.

“We’ll wait for you in the hall Liam.” Niall gestured as the rest of them followed him.

“You’re going to be okay. I know you are.” I pulled her in for a hug and kissed her forehead. “When the nights get rough and you watch the sun rise, please remember all the nights we spent together this summer.”

“I’ll never forget you Liam James Payne. Never.”

I helped her back into bed. Pushing her hair out of her face, I gave her one last kiss on the forehead. Holding her hand until I walked far enough we couldn’t touch anymore.

“I’m glad you came back Kaylin Marie Anderson.” I smiled at her as I walked out the door.