The Other Side of the World

We got back to the rehearsal studio just in time for the guys to start rehearsing. For some reason, I didn’t have a good feeling at that moment. It might have had to do with the 4 miss calls and 3 text messages I got from Cameron.

With Liam’s help, I brought in 5 bags full of food for the boys.

“Took you long enough.” Michael said while charging over to get his food.

“Save it Mike, I could have not bought you anything you know.” He smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek, showing his appreciation. “Exactly.” All the boys grabbed their food while One Direction set up for their time in the rehearsal studio.

“Thanks for answering your phone.” Cameron interrupted me before I could go over and talk to Liam some more.

“Well thanks for blowing it up. I was driving. I couldn’t really pick it up.”

“We still on for tonight though?” He looked at me as he stuffed his mouth with his burger.

“Shit. That’s tonight isn’t it?”

“Kay, I can’t believe you forgot. We’ve planned this dinner for weeks now. You promised.” He looked straight into my eyes. Gosh, I could never resist those green eyes.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t forget… I just…” I looked away because I knew I forgot about our date tonight.

“Didn’t remember…” He sighed. “Look, I know things between us… they’re not the same. And I can apologize a million times, but I don’t know… I just thought we were passed what happened.”

“Cam, it’s not that easy. But I promised we’d go out tonight. Just me and you, so I’m sticking to that promise. I’m sorry I forgot okay. Just today has been… Well out of the ordinary.” I gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I promise, me and you tonight. No one else.” I walked away knowing I shouldn’t have kissed him on the cheek. He was right though… We were passed what happened and I know he’s sorry, but it’s just so hard to actually move forward. I stood next to the piano where Liam was playing some Michael Bublè.

He stopped playing and I didn’t even notice. “Kaylin, are you okay?” Liam broke my thoughts of what could happen tonight.

“What?” I looked at him.

“Are you okay? You seem to have a lot going on right now?”

“Uh yeah, sorry. Just today… it’s all be a crazy day.” He smiled at me.

“Well I hope you’re having a good day.”

I bit my lip. “Yeah I am.” He moved over and gestured to sit next to him on the piano bench. “I have no idea how to play the piano. Zach and Nate have been trying to teach me for years now, but I can just never get it.”

“Okay here,” he grabbed my right hand, “put this finger here and this one here.”

“Okay… now what?”

“Just follow the beat.” As I started to follow as he did… The music started to come together! “Oh my gosh! I’m doing it! I’m playing the piano!” I jumped up, did a little happy dance, and hugged Liam. “Ah! I can’t believe I was doing it.”

“You seem so surprised.” He laughed at me.

“I’m not musically talented at all. Well I sing here and there… but nothing too big.”

“You sing?” He had a shocked look on his face. But before I could answer Savan walked in to help coach the guys vocally.

“Alright boys, places! We’ve got til 6pm to perfect this. Let’s get to work.”

“Will you excuse me,” Liam said politely. We walked away to set up with the rest of the boys.

As for myself , I went back to see Zach and the rest of the guys while they ate their food. “Hey Cam, what time is dinner?”

“7pm, why what’s up?”

“Er… nothing. What time is it now?” I was so fixated on the way One Direction simply sang blissfully through a song.

“4pm. Do you want to leave just as soon as the guys are done eating?”

“Yeah I want to get ready and what not.”

With my eyes still glued to One Direction, Zach interrupted, “Wow, these guys sound really good. I like it. It’s different. But it’s good.”

The boys finished up their food. They cleaned up and got their stuff together. I really wanted to say goodbye to the boys, but I didn’t want to interrupt their hard work.

“We’ll see you guys tomorrow!” Nathan yelled out. We all waved to say goodbye while the boys nodded gesturing their goodbye.

We got into the car and still in my little trance; I stared out the window while we drove to the hotel. Without a care in the world, I had too much going on in my head right now.

--

“So dinner with Cameron huh?” Zach yelled while lying in bed and flipping through channels.

I walked out of the bathroom, in my little black dress and red stilettos. “It’s just dinner. That’s it.”

“It’s never just dinner with you two. And in that outfit. No way.”

“I told you I was done Zach. I told you I don’t want to be with him anymore.”

“I get that you guys had a falling out or whatever happened with you two. But going out to dinner with him is giving him false hope here.”

“Feelings change okay? And no, because tonight I’m telling him I’m really done.”

“Bug,” That was his nickname for me. “Don’t ruin it. Please. We don’t need depressed Cameron on this tour.”

“There will be no depressed Cameron. Just possibly an angry one.” I bit my lip worried that things won’t go as smoothly as I hoped it would.

“I don’t like your outfit.”

“Well I don’t like your face, but I guess we both have to deal with it.” I stuck my tongue out at him. There was a knock on the door.

“Oh look Mr. Quiseng is here to pick up his damsel in distress.” Zach joked still fixated on the TV.

“You’re not funny you know that.” I answer the door to see Cameron in his best suit. This sick feeling inside me started up. I was nervous to go on a date with a guy I’ve known for years and gone on dates over and over again. I just had a bad feeling about tonight.

“Wow. You ready?” He put his arm out; as he did I wrap my arm around it.

“Zach, don’t wait up… please.”

“Are you kidding? I’m ready to knock out now. Have fun you kids. Now don’t come back too late, we have a long day tomorrow.” We walked out of the hotel arm in arm. Nothing felt right about this, but then again it all felt perfect. You’ve got a guy who is madly in love with you, though he says. He looks good, you look good, and it’s a perfect night in LA. Why am I complaining? We walked over to the restaurant Cameron first took me on our real first date. We got seated at our usual table right by the window.

Words were barely spoken on the way there or even in the beginning; I guess we always just enjoyed each other presences more than anything else. I stared out at the cars zooming by and the bright city lights across the street.

With our meal half way done with, we only exchanged a few words. Then Cameron suddenly spoke up, “What are you thinking about Kay?”

I looked over to him, “Nothing. Nothing at all. This is all perfect. Thank you for this.” We finally got into the flow of things; talking about the upcoming tour. Then the tour overseas right after that, it was always so easy to talk to him. But again, I just didn’t feel right.

“You done?”

I looked down at my plate, “Uh yeah.” He grabbed the check and then we headed out. “So where to now Cam?”

“Let’s just go for a walk?” He looked down for a quick second. “I just want to talk.”

“You know we gotta long day tomorrow right?”

“Come on Kay, its only 9:30pm. We could stay out for a little longer. It won’t hurt.”

“Whatever rockstar, you’re the one who as to perform in front of over 2000 people tomorrow.” We started to walk away from the restaurant, not really knowing where to go. But that’s what I always loved about Cameron, his spontaneity of everything.

Cameron slowly reached for my hand. I pulled it back before he got to holding it.

“Ah gosh I think I’m gonna have a food baby. I’m so full.” I said putting my hand on my stomach trying to avoid the tension.

“Where’s my baby?” He rubbed my stomach.

“Not funny Cam.” I glared at him.

“What? It turned out to be nothing. Right?”

“Yeah, but it was still scary. Zach would have killed you.”

“It takes two to tango babe.” I felt this awkwardness shoot through the air. We were both never good at dealing with the past.

We kept walking, joking around, and talking. I didn’t realize how late it was getting until we were almost back at the hotel. I realized I didn’t even talk about what I needed to talk about with him.

“Before we head inside Cam, I need to say something.” I grabbed him to look at me. He looked straight into my eyes and kissed me. “No Cam.” I pushed him off. “We can’t do this. We can’t be together.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I can’t be with you. I can’t keep trying to convince myself that I’m okay. And I can’t convince myself that you’ve changed.”

“Where is this all coming from? Tonight was perfect. Why are you doing this? It’s because of this Liam kid, isn’t it?!”

“What are you even talking about?!”

“I see the way you look at him. It’s exactly how you used to look at me.”

“You’re going crazy. It has nothing to do with Liam. Liam has no factor in this right now. It’s all because of what you did!”

“We’re gonna go on with this again?!” He was trying not to make a scene, but he was furious.

“You know how hard this is for me. How I can’t even tell my best friend what’s going on with me? How I have to hide everything from everyone because of you!” Tears started to run down my face. “You know what Cam, I’m done. All of this. I’m done. I won’t say anything to anyone, but I’m done with you. You and I are nothing more than professional. That’s it.” I ran before he could say anything else. Tears rolled down my face, I could barely see. I was hyperventilating. I got into the elevator and hurried before he could catch up.

“Kaylin! Wait!” Before he could try and stop the doors from closing I saw a quick glimpse of him, he was crying too. The elevator doors shut and I was left in the elevator alone and upset.

I got up to the 7th floor still so shaken up. I was crying harder than ever. I stumbled to my door and struggled to just get the room key into the slot. The tears kept falling, my heart kept breaking, and I just couldn’t breathe anymore. I finally got the door opened, remembering it was past 11 and that Zach was asleep. I tried to quietly get dressed and just get to bed without waking him.

I didn’t need him interrogating me. I was still crying, silently as I could. I got into bed, turned off my phone, and prayed Cameron wouldn’t come up to my room. I laid there still crying. I prayed Zach wouldn’t wake up. And I just hope I could move on from this.

Suddenly I heard Zach get up and slip into my bed. He put his arm around me and pulled me in. “One day, you’re going to find a guy who doesn’t hurt you. One day, you’re gonna be with someone who loves you. And one day you’re going to be with someone who deserves you just as much as you deserve him.” I cried and cried even more until I fell asleep in Zach’s arms.