Status: So... active for me apparently means years in between, I promise that's not the case this time. I hope.
Right to Choose
Raw
That was the first mistake I made, looking back. I fucked up big time that day, without even realising. I didn’t know then, I didn’t know what was going to happen. I had no idea just how far what I said that day was going to go, or what the consequences were going to be. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, and this one was explosive.
***
April 17th, 2011
“No… how could she… how… no…” Cass was talking to herself. The streets were quiet, the darkness of the night coating the houses like a blanket. It was cloudy out, blocking the stars from shining down. Cass could hear cars traveling on the main road a few hundred metres away from her, but she didn’t care anymore.
“I can’t believe…” Cass mumbled, dropping down into the gutter beside her, dejected. A glass bottle clattered on the road before rolling down the drain, breaking apart as it hit the concrete, “fuck me…” Cass slurred slightly before a string of expletives left her mouth as she realised that was all the alcohol she had, and no more money.
“Fuck,” Cass reached up to grab her hair, threading her fingers through the messy brown locks and tugging firmly, “fuuuuck,” she fell back then, not noticing the pain in her shoulder blades as her back hit the concrete footpath solidly, her feet still out in front of her, stretched onto the road.
“Fuck, fuck, fucking fuck,” she raised her voice, pulling harder on her hair, strands coming loose in her fists, “FUCK,” she finally screamed, her instincts giving way as emotional screams left her mouth, her body shaking as tears flowed down her cheeks.
Cass had no idea how long she was screaming for, or even how long she had been laying there since she fell silent. Her throat was raw, her voice scratchy when she tried to say anything out into the silent night. The streetlight above her flickered a few times before going out, leaving Cass in the darkness, the next few lights all broken, the nearest light down the other end of the street. A car slowly drove down the street a few minutes after the darkness set in, the bright artificial lights of the car illuminating the girl in the gutter, painting her skin a bright white in their harsh beam.
The car pulled over and there was the soft sound of a door opening and shutting, but still Cass didn’t move. She didn’t care anymore. In the back of her mind she heard the careful footfalls of the occupant, but it wasn’t until a new shaped appeared in her line of vision that Cass finally blinked and brought herself back into reality.
“I…” Cass tried to speak, her throat on fire as her scratchy voice failed her. She shifted her gaze up from the pale blue shirt above her, to the angled face, soft lips, a straight angled nose, and sparkling green eyes above. A few strands of light blonde hair fell into those vibrant eyes, but they didn’t deter from the intense gaze locked on her.
“Hi,” Cass sighed, closing her eyes.
“Cass, what’re you doing. We’ve had dozens of calls from here, reports of screaming,” Evans sighed, rocking back on her heels as she crouched next to the girl.
“T’was me,” Cass mumbled, trying to articulate her words, but failing.
“Have you been drinking?” Evans’ accusation was sharp and to the point, and for some reason that she couldn’t identify yet, Cass felt ashamed of her actions for the first time in years.
“Yuhh,” Cass tried to confess but failed, her voice giving out on her, so she simply nodded, keeping her eyes closed.
“You’re sixteen, Cass. Where did you get it?” Evans wasn’t impressed, but still she waited patiently for the teen girl, waving a distracted hand to her partner still in the car, letting him know she had the situation. Cass never responded, instead she just reached into her pocket and handed Evans a plastic card, “a fake ID? You know I’m going to have to take this,” Cass simply nodded, trying to sit up but failing miserably, collapsing back onto the ground.
“Jesus, Cass. We’re going to have to take you home. Come on, up you get,” Evans stood and dusted herself off before reaching out a hand, gripping Cass’s wrist and tugging slightly, helping the unsteady girl to her feet, “you okay?”
“Yeah, I…” Cass whispered before cutting herself off, turning around and heaving the contents of her stomach into the gutter where she was just sitting.
“I’ll take that as a no,” Evans rolled her eyes, rubbing the girl’s back gently, “c’mon, get it out, you’ll be alright, is this the first time you’ve drank?”
“No,” Cass managed to gasp out before vomiting again, the bile only causing more pain in her throat.
“No? Well how much have you had?”
“Bottle.. vodka…” Cass pointed towards the drain where she dropped her bottle. Leaving her for a moment, Evans pulled out her standard issue flashlight and peered into the drain, spotting the remnants of a vodka bottle and the lack of liquid surrounding it.
“A whole bottle? Christ, Cass. We’re taking you to the hospital, no excuses. Come here,” Evans looped her arm around Cass’s shoulders and half supported, half carried her to the parked police car, “ER, John, alcohol poisoning,” Evans spoke with authority to her partner in the driver’s seat as she helped Cass to lay down in the back of the car, “don’t you dare throw up in here.”
Cass could only groan in response as the car pulled out, speeding towards their destination.
“I asked her out. Lex. My Lexi,” Cass spoke out into the otherwise silent car after a few minutes, finding her voice through her need to try and explain herself. She felt ashamed, and didn’t like that feeling at all. Evans was still silent, but Cass could see her eyes in the rear view mirror, and she knew she was listening, “I asked her out. Said no. Slammed in my face. Doesn’t want me,” Cass was getting quieter, fresh tears threatening to spill across her cheeks.
“Are you both..?” Evans spoke for the first time since they’d been driving, leaving her question open, knowing Cass would understand.
“I don’t know.”
Evans sighed and rubbed her temples as the car fell silent once more. Her partner, John, looked over at Evans worriedly as he pulled into the emergency park at the hospital.
“I’ll go with her until we can get a guardian. I know you had work to do back at the station,” Evans muttered to John as she undid her seatbelt. He didn’t say anything, only nodded as Evans got out, moving to the back of the car and helping the intoxicated teen out.
“Mistakes…” Cass slurred drunkenly as she was half carried into the emergency room, her feet a few steps behind the rest of her body as she stumbled along, knowing it was only Evans keeping her upright, “mistakes…”
***
April 17th, 2011
“No… how could she… how… no…” Cass was talking to herself. The streets were quiet, the darkness of the night coating the houses like a blanket. It was cloudy out, blocking the stars from shining down. Cass could hear cars traveling on the main road a few hundred metres away from her, but she didn’t care anymore.
“I can’t believe…” Cass mumbled, dropping down into the gutter beside her, dejected. A glass bottle clattered on the road before rolling down the drain, breaking apart as it hit the concrete, “fuck me…” Cass slurred slightly before a string of expletives left her mouth as she realised that was all the alcohol she had, and no more money.
“Fuck,” Cass reached up to grab her hair, threading her fingers through the messy brown locks and tugging firmly, “fuuuuck,” she fell back then, not noticing the pain in her shoulder blades as her back hit the concrete footpath solidly, her feet still out in front of her, stretched onto the road.
“Fuck, fuck, fucking fuck,” she raised her voice, pulling harder on her hair, strands coming loose in her fists, “FUCK,” she finally screamed, her instincts giving way as emotional screams left her mouth, her body shaking as tears flowed down her cheeks.
Cass had no idea how long she was screaming for, or even how long she had been laying there since she fell silent. Her throat was raw, her voice scratchy when she tried to say anything out into the silent night. The streetlight above her flickered a few times before going out, leaving Cass in the darkness, the next few lights all broken, the nearest light down the other end of the street. A car slowly drove down the street a few minutes after the darkness set in, the bright artificial lights of the car illuminating the girl in the gutter, painting her skin a bright white in their harsh beam.
The car pulled over and there was the soft sound of a door opening and shutting, but still Cass didn’t move. She didn’t care anymore. In the back of her mind she heard the careful footfalls of the occupant, but it wasn’t until a new shaped appeared in her line of vision that Cass finally blinked and brought herself back into reality.
“I…” Cass tried to speak, her throat on fire as her scratchy voice failed her. She shifted her gaze up from the pale blue shirt above her, to the angled face, soft lips, a straight angled nose, and sparkling green eyes above. A few strands of light blonde hair fell into those vibrant eyes, but they didn’t deter from the intense gaze locked on her.
“Hi,” Cass sighed, closing her eyes.
“Cass, what’re you doing. We’ve had dozens of calls from here, reports of screaming,” Evans sighed, rocking back on her heels as she crouched next to the girl.
“T’was me,” Cass mumbled, trying to articulate her words, but failing.
“Have you been drinking?” Evans’ accusation was sharp and to the point, and for some reason that she couldn’t identify yet, Cass felt ashamed of her actions for the first time in years.
“Yuhh,” Cass tried to confess but failed, her voice giving out on her, so she simply nodded, keeping her eyes closed.
“You’re sixteen, Cass. Where did you get it?” Evans wasn’t impressed, but still she waited patiently for the teen girl, waving a distracted hand to her partner still in the car, letting him know she had the situation. Cass never responded, instead she just reached into her pocket and handed Evans a plastic card, “a fake ID? You know I’m going to have to take this,” Cass simply nodded, trying to sit up but failing miserably, collapsing back onto the ground.
“Jesus, Cass. We’re going to have to take you home. Come on, up you get,” Evans stood and dusted herself off before reaching out a hand, gripping Cass’s wrist and tugging slightly, helping the unsteady girl to her feet, “you okay?”
“Yeah, I…” Cass whispered before cutting herself off, turning around and heaving the contents of her stomach into the gutter where she was just sitting.
“I’ll take that as a no,” Evans rolled her eyes, rubbing the girl’s back gently, “c’mon, get it out, you’ll be alright, is this the first time you’ve drank?”
“No,” Cass managed to gasp out before vomiting again, the bile only causing more pain in her throat.
“No? Well how much have you had?”
“Bottle.. vodka…” Cass pointed towards the drain where she dropped her bottle. Leaving her for a moment, Evans pulled out her standard issue flashlight and peered into the drain, spotting the remnants of a vodka bottle and the lack of liquid surrounding it.
“A whole bottle? Christ, Cass. We’re taking you to the hospital, no excuses. Come here,” Evans looped her arm around Cass’s shoulders and half supported, half carried her to the parked police car, “ER, John, alcohol poisoning,” Evans spoke with authority to her partner in the driver’s seat as she helped Cass to lay down in the back of the car, “don’t you dare throw up in here.”
Cass could only groan in response as the car pulled out, speeding towards their destination.
“I asked her out. Lex. My Lexi,” Cass spoke out into the otherwise silent car after a few minutes, finding her voice through her need to try and explain herself. She felt ashamed, and didn’t like that feeling at all. Evans was still silent, but Cass could see her eyes in the rear view mirror, and she knew she was listening, “I asked her out. Said no. Slammed in my face. Doesn’t want me,” Cass was getting quieter, fresh tears threatening to spill across her cheeks.
“Are you both..?” Evans spoke for the first time since they’d been driving, leaving her question open, knowing Cass would understand.
“I don’t know.”
Evans sighed and rubbed her temples as the car fell silent once more. Her partner, John, looked over at Evans worriedly as he pulled into the emergency park at the hospital.
“I’ll go with her until we can get a guardian. I know you had work to do back at the station,” Evans muttered to John as she undid her seatbelt. He didn’t say anything, only nodded as Evans got out, moving to the back of the car and helping the intoxicated teen out.
“Mistakes…” Cass slurred drunkenly as she was half carried into the emergency room, her feet a few steps behind the rest of her body as she stumbled along, knowing it was only Evans keeping her upright, “mistakes…”