The Wonderful Yet Terrible Reality
Chapter One
"Ugh, Max what do I do?" I ask groaning again.
"I can't help you dear. You have to do this all on your own." she say, not helping at all.
"But what if I can't? What if something bad happens?" I ask, glaring at her.
"Only time can tell. Your still friends right. They're going on tour in 2 days anyways. If you give him the tour he'll get over it. He had to break up with you chels. He had no choice. He'll understand soon enough." she says, seeming as if she knows him better than I do.
"Fine, I'll give him the tour, but that's it. If he's not over it by then him and I will have some major talking to do." I say getting up off my bed to get ready for the day. Since today was gonna be a major blow off day anyways I decided to do the usual jeans-and-a-t shirt combo. I chose a pair of destressed black skinnys, my favorite All Time Low t shirt, and my black high top chucks.
"Max, let's go hang with the guys." I yell up the steps as I feed my dog, Mable. She's my baby. She also happens to be his baby too considering he's known her since we first met.
" 'Kay, i'll be right down." Me and Max are practically twins when it comes to the way we dress.
Oddly enough she comes down stairs in her destressed black skinnys, her favorite All Time Low t shirt and her black high top chucks. Once we see each other we can't stop laughing. This isn't the first time we've done this either.
" 'Kay let's go." We leave in my "baby". My car is literally the car of my dreams. The Porsche 911, yellow with black racing stips, convertable, and the dealership works. The whole way to their house we're belting Lost in the Stereo, our favorite All Time Low song, at the top of our lungs, the top down. Once we get their we walk up to the big picture window and look in like we're planning on braking in. Then the door opens. It's him.
"Hey," he says, obviously not happy to see me at all,"Jack saw you so I guess you better come in." then he's gone.
Max and I walk into to the house and tackle the guys on the couch. I end up in Zach's lap and Max is in Jack's cracking up. When I go to get up I see Alex just standing there scowling at me like I did something wrong and then I hear him storm upstairs.
"What's his issue?" I ask Zach.
"Umm, hate to tell you this dear, but he did just break up with you yesterday. If I was him I'd be
kinda pissed that you were in my house too." He says softly.
"Oh." was all I could muster up to say. "Do you think I should go talk to him." All he does is shake his head, so I slowly make my way upstairs. When I get in front of his door it takes me what seems like forever to knock on his door. When I hear the door knob turn my heart stops because I know what his face is going to look like when he sees who it is.
"Oh, what do you want?" he says, a look of sheer disgust on his face.
"I just wanted to talk." I say in barely an audible voice. When I say this he just rolls his eyes and moves out of the way of the door so I can walk in. I go and sit at the desk, the place farthest from the bed he was sitting on.
"So you said you wanted to talk. Well, talk."
"I'm sorry, you know that, why can't you forgive me." I blurt out before I can contain myself.
"Chelsea, you know why I can't." he whispers looking away. Before I can help myself, I'm across the room, on the bed next to him, my hands on his face making him look at me. Some how he still seemed to look away.
"Alex, please, look at me." But instead of looking at me he grabs my wrists and takes my hands away from him so I can't touch him. That's when I feel the sting tears on my eyes. "Alex, please, don't do this." I whisper, trying to hold back the tears.
"What am I supposed to do? Just forgive you and say 'here's my heart, you can break it again' ." he yells getting up off the bed and starting to pace.
"Alex, it was an accident. You have to believe me." I say standing up.
"Really, I have to believe you? I don't think so." he yells. When he says this I step in his way so he has to stop pacing.
"Yes you do. We've been over this. We we're drunk. I was hammered Alex. You know how I get. He kissed me. Yes, I ended up cheating, Am I proud of it? Hell no! Would I take it back if I could? Hell yes! But, I can't. Alex, I love you. You know that." I yell, equally as pissed off as he is.
"I just don't know anymore. Can you please leave?" when he said that I saw his bottom lip quiver and his voice cracked slightly. I knew why he was asking me to leave. So I left. When I was back down stairs I just stood there while everyone was staring at me. They heard everything. All I could do was just stand there and cry. Luckily, Zack was there to hold me because if he wouldn't have been, I felt like I would've literally fallen to pieces. Then he comes downstairs and sees Zack holding me. When i heard things start to crash upstairs i broke free of Zack's grasp, ran to my car and sped the whole way home. I couldn't take it, the pain was too much to bare.
When i got home i went straight to the bathroom, opened the top draw under that sink, and slide my hand into the familiar hiding place. My razor. Before it could cut my skin, i shut my eyes and waited for the release...
"I can't help you dear. You have to do this all on your own." she say, not helping at all.
"But what if I can't? What if something bad happens?" I ask, glaring at her.
"Only time can tell. Your still friends right. They're going on tour in 2 days anyways. If you give him the tour he'll get over it. He had to break up with you chels. He had no choice. He'll understand soon enough." she says, seeming as if she knows him better than I do.
"Fine, I'll give him the tour, but that's it. If he's not over it by then him and I will have some major talking to do." I say getting up off my bed to get ready for the day. Since today was gonna be a major blow off day anyways I decided to do the usual jeans-and-a-t shirt combo. I chose a pair of destressed black skinnys, my favorite All Time Low t shirt, and my black high top chucks.
"Max, let's go hang with the guys." I yell up the steps as I feed my dog, Mable. She's my baby. She also happens to be his baby too considering he's known her since we first met.
" 'Kay, i'll be right down." Me and Max are practically twins when it comes to the way we dress.
Oddly enough she comes down stairs in her destressed black skinnys, her favorite All Time Low t shirt and her black high top chucks. Once we see each other we can't stop laughing. This isn't the first time we've done this either.
" 'Kay let's go." We leave in my "baby". My car is literally the car of my dreams. The Porsche 911, yellow with black racing stips, convertable, and the dealership works. The whole way to their house we're belting Lost in the Stereo, our favorite All Time Low song, at the top of our lungs, the top down. Once we get their we walk up to the big picture window and look in like we're planning on braking in. Then the door opens. It's him.
"Hey," he says, obviously not happy to see me at all,"Jack saw you so I guess you better come in." then he's gone.
Max and I walk into to the house and tackle the guys on the couch. I end up in Zach's lap and Max is in Jack's cracking up. When I go to get up I see Alex just standing there scowling at me like I did something wrong and then I hear him storm upstairs.
"What's his issue?" I ask Zach.
"Umm, hate to tell you this dear, but he did just break up with you yesterday. If I was him I'd be
kinda pissed that you were in my house too." He says softly.
"Oh." was all I could muster up to say. "Do you think I should go talk to him." All he does is shake his head, so I slowly make my way upstairs. When I get in front of his door it takes me what seems like forever to knock on his door. When I hear the door knob turn my heart stops because I know what his face is going to look like when he sees who it is.
"Oh, what do you want?" he says, a look of sheer disgust on his face.
"I just wanted to talk." I say in barely an audible voice. When I say this he just rolls his eyes and moves out of the way of the door so I can walk in. I go and sit at the desk, the place farthest from the bed he was sitting on.
"So you said you wanted to talk. Well, talk."
"I'm sorry, you know that, why can't you forgive me." I blurt out before I can contain myself.
"Chelsea, you know why I can't." he whispers looking away. Before I can help myself, I'm across the room, on the bed next to him, my hands on his face making him look at me. Some how he still seemed to look away.
"Alex, please, look at me." But instead of looking at me he grabs my wrists and takes my hands away from him so I can't touch him. That's when I feel the sting tears on my eyes. "Alex, please, don't do this." I whisper, trying to hold back the tears.
"What am I supposed to do? Just forgive you and say 'here's my heart, you can break it again' ." he yells getting up off the bed and starting to pace.
"Alex, it was an accident. You have to believe me." I say standing up.
"Really, I have to believe you? I don't think so." he yells. When he says this I step in his way so he has to stop pacing.
"Yes you do. We've been over this. We we're drunk. I was hammered Alex. You know how I get. He kissed me. Yes, I ended up cheating, Am I proud of it? Hell no! Would I take it back if I could? Hell yes! But, I can't. Alex, I love you. You know that." I yell, equally as pissed off as he is.
"I just don't know anymore. Can you please leave?" when he said that I saw his bottom lip quiver and his voice cracked slightly. I knew why he was asking me to leave. So I left. When I was back down stairs I just stood there while everyone was staring at me. They heard everything. All I could do was just stand there and cry. Luckily, Zack was there to hold me because if he wouldn't have been, I felt like I would've literally fallen to pieces. Then he comes downstairs and sees Zack holding me. When i heard things start to crash upstairs i broke free of Zack's grasp, ran to my car and sped the whole way home. I couldn't take it, the pain was too much to bare.
When i got home i went straight to the bathroom, opened the top draw under that sink, and slide my hand into the familiar hiding place. My razor. Before it could cut my skin, i shut my eyes and waited for the release...