If I Fell

Dainty hands rose to caress his angelic face.

She traced her fingertips along his strong jaw, worshiping the smooth skin settled there. The digits of her hand drifted upwards, memorizing the curve of his cheekbones. Nearly stroking the lids of his eyes, she dropped her hands, deciding against it, for it might cause him to wake.

Just watching the gentle rising and falling of his firm chest, and listening to his breath pass through his lips, she settled on simply studying him from his side.

She mentally compared themselves. She was petite, short and thin. He was large, tall and muscular. Her features were sharp and pronounced, his were masculine yet soft. His eyes were unique in their beautiful hazel shade, hers were a dull brown, holding no significance. When he smiled two deep dimples were produced. When she formed a grin her cheeks tended to raise too high, influencing her eyes to squint.

In her mind he stood out. He would always be in the limelight, just like she would always be in the background.

She knew it was time. Time for what she labeled as a fling, to end.

She allowed herself one last look. Observing his every detailed tattoo upon his exposed torso, and every beautiful feature gracing his rounded face.

She rose from her resting place. Her eyes tore away from him as she bent to grab her packed luggage.

With a deep sigh, one filled with regret and sorrow, she turned away from the bedroom and began to walk to the hotel door, suitcase rolling behind her.

"Cassidy?" His voice held a tired tone.

This sudden intrusion of sound caused her breath to hitch within her throat.

"Yes?" She finally was able to mutter out with her back turned to him.

"Where the hell are you going?" Cassidy remained turned from him. She could imagine him rising from his spot, rubbing his tired eyes, stretching in the process.

She remained frozen, silent, unsure of how to answer him. She yearned to reply, 'Nowhere', drop her luggage to the ground, and take refuge in his bed with him, yet, she knew that was unwise to both her mind and heart.

"Well?" She heard his feet meet with the ground. The sound of the springs beneath him releasing their tight coil, as he stood from the bed, was amplified in the silence.

"It's time for me to go."

"Why?" He always managed to ask her the most difficult of questions.

"I've got to return home." She did her best to stand tall. She could feel him inching closer to her, nearly connecting them with his chest and her back.

"No you don't." He dipped his head and whispered huskily into her ear. His strong hands rose to rest on her hips, calloused fingers stroking her skin through the pink fabric of her dress.

"Matthew, as nice as this has been, I-" He instantly dropped his hands, rounding her frame to stand before her.

"From the way you're talking it seems like this is just a fucking fling." His voice was firm.

"Well, yes, Matthew, it seems it was." She searched herself for some ounce of confidence.

"So your telling me, I fucking pour my heart out like some chick to someone I just met, thinking we'd have something special, only to be shot down by her?" He was getting angry, an emotion she had not seen from him in the short period of time she had known him.

She remained silent, afraid to answer him.

"You know, I should have known. You meet a girl in Florida at spring break, of course she's gonna turn out to be some slut! I should have fucking known." Her jaw dropped at the term he used for her. "You know, I've never felt anything like this for anyone before! I would've sworn I fucking loved you!" Another look of shock dominated her face.

"Y-you love me?" That same girl with the low self esteem from Maine surfaced. She hadn't stuttered this entire trip like she constantly did at home.

"I thought I did." He backed against the closest wall, sliding down the surface, taking a seat on the floor in front of her. "I thought you would be different, wanting more than just a week long of temporary fun." His eyes were connected to the ground.

The room them fell silent once again. Cassidy remained standing, one hand keeping hold of her suitcase, other nervously clutching at her dress. Matt stayed seated on the floor, thinking of all he had said and did over the last few days to make her think he was less than serious about what they had.

"How can you fall in love with someone you've only known for a week?" Her voice was meek.

"I have no fucking clue. But I did. Isn't it great?" The sarcasm managed to flow through his every word. "I've been with girls for years without feeling so much as an inkling of love, yet, you come along, and their I am. Some pussy willing to do anything and everything for some stranger."

Another wave of silence filled the room.

Cassidy gently let her bag rest against the floor before taking soft steps to where Matt sat on the ground. She sat next to him, waiting for him to speak.

"Do you not even give a shit about me? Is that why you're so fucking guarded and shy?"

"That's not it at all." Her voice held more confidence as she spoke.

"Then what is it, Cassidy? I'd appreciate it if you'd enlightened me for a moment." She noticed that once he'd become frustrated, he would turn to sarcasm.

"I-well, I-"

"You?" He would also become impatient and snappy.

"Well, Matt, you see-" She stopped rambling, took a deep breath, and angled her body to him as she spoke. "I don't like speaking to people about me. My emotions and private lif-"

"Whatever. Just leave then." He interrupted her from speaking, and stood, starting for the balcony, not wanting to wait around and watch her leave.

"Wait, Matthew! You didn't let me finish!" She stood as well.

"What then? You don't like talking to just anyone about you, and since I'm a nobody, I should just fuck off and let you do your own thing, right?" His voice began to raise.

"No, not at all. You're so amazing, Matt! Everything you do has been kind, gentle, and sweet, the things I need from a guy! You're the most perfect man I have ever met! You make me feel as though I can tell you anything!"

"That's because you can." His gentle side surfaced.

"Matt, I'm scared, alright? I know, it's the most cliche, oldest, and unoriginal excuse in the book, but it's true."

"Scared of what, Cassidy? Me?" He prayed she wasn't.

"No! No, of course not, Matthew! Not of you. Never of you!" She pleaded he would never believe such a terrible thought.

"Then of what?"

"Rejection. I've given everything I've had to a man before. He simply took my heart within his grasp and tore it apart. He taught me that love was far greater than a four letter word. I've been hurt before, Matthew. I cannot allow that to happen again."

"That's why you're trying to leave? Get out and hurt yourself before I could hurt you?" She nodded solemnly. "I won't hurt you, Cassidy. I told you, I love you."

"So did h-"

"No he did not." His voice was firm. "If he loved you, and saw what a beautiful, terrific person you were, his heart would have been broken at the thought of hurting you." She thought about this. Love required more than just holding hands, saying those three words, and sharing property. Love required devotion and attention, something Matthew was willingly giving her, something she was wanting to give to him.

He crossed the room, raising his palm to caress her smooth cheek. His eyes held security and truth as he spoke, "I love you, Cassidy. Please, don't leave. I know we only met a few days ago, but because of these few days we've shared, I now know what love is. To me, love is you. I would never dream of hurting you, Cassidy."

"I can trust you with my heart?" She held his large hand in her two small ones, holding his against her chest, above her beating heart.

"Of course."

"You'll never lie to me?"

"Never."

"You'll teach me what it means to truly love someone?"

His soft lips connected with the jutting of her cheekbone before muttering with confidence, "Every single day."