Hunt the Haunted

When morning finally broke after my extremely restless night, I’d slept for barely an hour, and I was still dog tired. I stretched, getting a strange satisfying feeling when I heard all my joints crack into place. I slipped my rabbit slippers on to my feet, and I went to pull on my favourite Fall Out Boy hoodie, before I realised where it was. Or should I say who had it?

Either way, that small action had the unfortunate side effect of making all of last night’s events coming flooding back to me with all the force of a freight train. I gasped as emotions crushed my lungs, and my head spun. I grabbed onto my dresser to stop myself from falling, and when I’d finally gained some composure, I decided that I needed some air.

So, I went outside. Which was the obvious choice of what to do. The ground was wet, the grass drowning in mud. The rain still fell steadily, but it was much lighter than it had been before. Like ninja rain. You know, that rain that is barely there, but you still know it’s falling? Yeah, like that. I walked across the field, not caring that my slippers were ruined or that I was probably going to catch a cold. I just kept walking.

When I reached the small copse of trees that marked where my land ended and my neighbour’s land begun, I screamed. And I kept screaming. I let out everything that I kept inside for so long. I screamed for Josh, for Andy, for my mother and for my father. I screamed for the friends I’d let go, and the opportunities I’d missed. I screamed myself hoarse. And I was still screaming when he appeared behind me.

I jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I whirled around, falling into his arms just as the tears started flowing again. He held me in his arms, keeping me upright. There was this weird sensation of déjà vu, except our positions were reversed. He was the one holding me. He was the one whispering calming words into my hair.

‘It’ll be okay.’ Over, and over.

‘How Josh? How is any of this okay?!’ I pushed away from him and stumbled backwards until my back hit a tree.

‘It’s okay because I’m here. You’re not alone.’

‘How long will it be though, Josh? How long before you leave me again? How long before you get bored? How is any of this fair, Josh? I knew this ‘gift’ would fuck me up, but I never thought it would go to the extent that I actually fall for a dead guy.’ There was a silence after that. My confession hanging heavy in the air between us. I’d just admitted it. I was falling for him, and I was falling hard. When he didn’t speak I started to panic, hyperventilating. I was trying my hardest to breathe, but it was getting difficult.

He stepped towards me, our gazes locked. When he was close enough for me to see the light grey specks dotted in his eyes, he cupped my face in his hands, before leaning in, and kissing me again. This time was different though. I was all too aware of who I was kissing, but I didn’t care. Everything was peaceful for a moment, his lips on mine, the rain stopping, the sun, shining through the leaves of the trees.

And then we hit desperate. I started kissing him back, trying to pour as much need and desperation into that little bit of contact as possible. The kiss became bruising. Both of us trying to convey our feelings, our not quite love. Eventually, I had to pull away from the battle for air, because I still needed it to survive.

He picked me up, bridal style, like I weighed little more than a feather, and I guess to him, I didn’t. Because ghosts have this super-human strength. It’s kinda weird, and I don’t really understand why they have it, but God knows it’s come in useful when I’ve been in some rather, sticky situations. He carried me all the way back to the house, and he placed me on the rug on the floor, in front of the fireplace.

I stretched again, before standing and going to get changed. When I returned, he’d started a fire, and I sat down on the rug again, gratefully accepting the cup of tea he presented to me. I cuddled into his chest, and we sat in comfortable silence, both thinking about what had just happened, and what it meant. I heard Josh inhale as he prepared to speak. Ghosts didn’t need to inhale, or exhale, but it was a habit that many of them found hard to break.

‘Amelia?’ Simple enough question.

‘Mmhmm?’

‘You know I’ll never leave you, right?’ He questioned.

‘Oh, but Josh, you will. Everyone always does. As soon as we find out what’s keeping you here, you’ll be gone. But, can we not think about that? Can we just enjoy this?’

‘I won’t leave. I don’t have to leave unless we find out what’s keeping me here, so let’s just... not look.’ I snuggled into his chest even more, and he placed and light kiss on the top of my hair. ‘Look, Amelia. I promise. I’ll never go.’

‘But if you don’t go, this can never work. I’m going to get old, wrinkly. Eventually, I’ll die. And there’s no guarantee we’ll end up in the same place.’

‘Darling, even when you’re 82, I’ll still feel the same.’ He said affectionately.

‘There’s no guarantee of that either.’ I whispered, but I guess he heard me. He pulled me back, so we were both lying down, my head on his chest.

‘I’m dead Amelia. I can guarantee you forever. Besides, who else am I gonna fall for?’ He asked jokingly. I looked up, and as my green eyes met his stormy blue ones, our lips met again. Only this time, it was loving. Gentle.

Or at least it was. Until my hand slipped under his shirt, and I swung myself round so I was straddling his waist. My eyes met his, challenging him, and he rolled us over, practically ripping his shirt off as he went. My top went next, as he kissed my jaw line, and I arched into him when he nibbled my ear.

Now, I’m not going to make up some story about how it was magical. Because it wasn’t, not really. Yeah, it was a bit weird, I mean, I knew I was technically having sex with a dead guy, but it felt safe. Not wrong, or even particularly right. But it felt like a promise. Him promising me that he wouldn’t leave, and me promising him that I’d believe him. And in that time when we were, well, intertwined, for the first time in God knows how long, I felt peaceful. I felt calm. I felt like this wasn’t such a fucked up endeavour.

When we, well, finished. I fell asleep, my head once again on his chest, the blanket from the back of the sofa covering us. Now, you see, a lot of weird things happen to me, but the dream I had while asleep on that floor was one of the weirdest.