The Only Hope for Me Is You Alone

I woke up with a knot in my stomach. I've been feeling it ever since Gerard left. I turned to my side and saw my daughter in a deep sleep. I smiled and kissed her head. I jumped when I heard my phone ring. I picked it up and answered it quickly.
"Hello?"
"Lindsey! Finally, I was texting and calling you-"
"I was sleeping sorry."
"Well.. Honey I'm in the hospital..."
"Oh Gerard Arthur Way what did you do?!" I said as I ran outside the room. "Gerard-"
"I was getting my car out of the snow but I slipped on ice, smacked my head into my car door"
"Gerard!"
"I broke my leg and I have a concussion"
"Gerard!"
"I'm Gerard"
"You broke your leg?! Gerard you have tours!"
"Honey please, I know-"
"Gerard we can't afford for you to lose work like this! We can't support our kids-"
"Whoa... Kids?"
"Gerard pay attention! We need to pay bills and with you out of work. I have to work again."
"LINDSEY what do you mean by kids?!"
"I mean kid, but Gerard!"
"Why are you over-reacting?! I hate when you do this! That's why I never tell you anything!"
"Gerard please I'm sorry, just the fight we had and everything-"
"Everything? Lindsey you deal with nothing."
"Gerard, who gets left home with Annabel? Who takes care of the house? Who makes sure you have food?"
"Lindsey, who makes sure you have money to shop? Who pays the bills? Who goes to work while you just sit on your ass all day?"
"Gerard... I can't get a job because I didn't graduate high school.."
"You should have kept your legs closed."
"GERARD"
"You're stressing me out!"
"You called me!"
"STOP FIGHTING WITH DADDY!" Annabel cried as she ran down the stairs. "I WANNA BE WITH HIM I WANT HIM HERE I WANT DADDY!"
"I'm coming back when I can actually get up. I'm taking my things and Annabel and leaving."
"Gerard no! Please don't leave me!"
"You're so desperate. You know you're nothing without me!"
"Gerard please!"
"Go to Bert"
"GERARD NO PLEASE!"

The second I heard the dial tone I sank to the floor and cried.

"I want daddy." Annabel said as she wiped her eyes.
"Then go to him! Go with your precious father!" I shouted as she stomped upstairs. I punched the living room wall then went in the bathroom. I swung open the medicine cabinet and grabbed the bag of cocaine I kept for times like these. I did a few lines and sat in the bathtub and fell asleep.

"Baby girl" Gerard said as he sat with me on the couch. "My baby girl." He smiled and kissed me on my cheeks then my forehead then my lips.
"Gerard" I giggled. "Why are you so good to me?"
"Well, because you're my baby girl." He smiled.
I cuddled up with him and kissed his lips. "Gerard, the baby's almost here."
"I know." Gerard said as he grinned. "I can't wait to see my other baby girl." He said as he rubbed my stomach. He laid down and put his head on my stomach. "This time, I mean it, I'll let you know just how much you mean to me. As snow falls, on desert skies, until the end of everything. I'm trying, trying; to let you know just how much you mean to me" Gerard sang softly.
I smiled down at him and played with his hair.
"Gee, do you want me to pick up diapers while I'm out?"
"Mom, I took care of it. I bought everything."
"Wow Gerard..." His mother said as she smiled.
"He put up a crib, he got toys and diapers and clothes" I said as I continued to play with his hair. "I don't know where I'd be without him."
"Me either Lindsey... Me either." His mother said with another smile as she left.
Gerard turned the TV off and sat up. "Uh... Lindsey..."
"Yes?" I said as I looked up at him.
"My.... prom's coming up...."
"Yeah...."
"Lindsey... baby girl... I want you as my date..."
I looked at him. "Gerard..."
"Lindsey shh... I know... You can't go back so.... I want you to be happy."
"Oh Gerard!" I said happily as I hugged him. "But... I can't... I don't have anything to we-"
Gerard took my hand and took me to the basement to a big box.
"Go on... Open it." Gerard said with a smile.
I opened it, and... I was speechless.
"Gerard! Oh my god! You didn't!" I said happily.
"That's right I didn't. My mom and I did."
I took out a pink, long, beautiful dress from the box.
"Gerard..."
"Baby girl" Gerard said as he wrapped his arms around him from behind."My baby girl's going to look so beautiful... Oh excuse me, my two baby girls!" Gerard said as he rubbed my stomach.
I smiled and turned to him. "I love you."
"I love you too my beautiful baby girl." Gerard said as he kissed my lips.
"Gerard..."
"Yes?"
"Why do you want me?"
"Lindsey... I love you so much. I don't care how old you are... I don't care if you're pregnant.... I don't care about how you were raised..." He said as he caressed my cheek. "You're so beautiful, and nice, and... I can't describe you. Lindsey, I want you to be mine forever..."
"I'm yours..."
"Lindsey... I don't... wanna sound like a pervert but... what does... sex feel like..."
I looked him in the eyes. "Do you want.. to find out?"
Gerard nodded and blushed.
I took his hand to his room and shut the door. I locked it behind us.
"I... I'm nervous..." Gerard said as he sat on his bed.
"Me too..." I said and giggled.
Gerard smiled and laid back.
I took off my shit and bra slowly.
"Oh... my god....." Gerard said as he sat straight up. His eyes bulged.
I took off my pants and underwear then looked at him.
Gerard took off his shirt and looked down at his stomach.
I kissed his lips. "Gerard... You're handsome."
Gerard smiled and pulled his pants down with his boxers. He slowly kissed my chest.
"Oh Gerard..."
Gerard pushed me on the bed and got on top of me.
"Do I...?"
I nodded.
Gerard went slow and kissed my lips. I felt a tingling sensation... I liked it.
"Gerard... Faster...." I said in between moaning.
Gerard went faster, and faster. He went so fast, his bed slammed into the wall so hard it knocked things off of Mikey's shelves.
"Oh God... Lindsey I"m gonna cum... what do I do?!"
"Just keep going!"
"Oh Lindsey! Oh fuck! Oh god! FUCK!"
I looked up at him, I haven't breathed this hard in a while. Gerard slowed down and laid his head on my chest. I wiped sweat from his forehead and kissed his head.
"L.. Lindsey... That was... Amazing...." Gerard said as he lifted his head up and kissed me.
"I know" I said "I know."
"Lindsey..."
"Yes?"
He sat up and got dressed. "Our baby shouldn't have seen that." He said as he laughed.
I laughed also as I got dressed.
"Stop." Gerard said after I put on my bra. He put his head to my stomach. "Lindsey! She's kicking! Oh my god! She's kicking!"
Gerard ran out of his room. "Mikey! My baby kicked! Oh my god!" He shouted excitedly.
"Gerard... Go away" Mikey said as he slammed the door.
Gerard ran back to me. "Name her Annabel." He said with a smile. "Annabel Autumn Way!"
I smiled.
"Annabel...." He said as he took a picture out of his drawer. "Annabel."
I looked over at him, I was curious to what he was holding.
"I had... a sister named Annabel..." Gerard said as he sat on his bed.
I hugged him from behind as I looked at the picture. "Aw Gee, she's adorable!"
"She.. died."
"How?"
"It was my fault...."
"Tell me..."
"I was playing ball with her out in the yard... She was 6. And I threw it too high and it went in the street. Annabel said I'll get it rardy... She couldn't say my name... But anyway, she ran out... A car was coming. I shouted Annabel come back and ran after her. By the time I got out.... She was... She was gone...."
"Gerard... That wasn't your fault...."
"I was supposed to be watching her!"
"Gerard... You were younger... She was too..."
Gerard looked at me with tears in his eyes. "I love you Lindsey..."
"I love you too Gerard."
"Lindsey...." Gerard said as he knelt in front of me and took my hand. "I have nothing to offer you but... I wanna be with you forever- wait..." Gerard got up and went back in his drawer and took out a ring. "Lindsey Michelle Cobain..."
I looked at the ring then him.
He knelt down again. "Lindsey... Michelle Cobain... will you marry me?"
I smiled and hugged him tightly. "Yes!"
Gerard put the ring on my finger. "This was my grandmothers...." He smiled up at me. "Now it's my baby girl's" He laid down and pulled me down with him. "Lindsey Michelle Way..."
I smiled up at him.
Gerard rubbed my stomach. "Annabel Autumn Way" He smiled bigger.

On prom night, Gerard's mom did my hair and everything... I felt like a princess. When I put my dress on, it didn't hide my secret. Gerard wore a handsome tuxedo. He looked so amazing...
"Are you ready my sweet?"
I walked downstairs and held his hand. "I'm ready."
"Oh my baby girl looks so beautiful." He said with a smile.
"Lindsey you look stunning... and you're very rosey today Hun. The baby's due any time now. Gerard, remember, bring her straight home. Lindsey's ready to pop."
"Alright mom, see you later." He said with a smile as he took my arm and walked me to the prom.
When we walked in, everyone stared at us.
"Honey... You're beautiful." Gerard whispered to me.
I smiled at him.
The whole night, Gerard told everyone he got me pregnant and that it's a girl. Some people were happy for us but, majority thought I was a whore. I spent the night sitting and watching Gerard talk to his friends but.. I was happy to be out of the house.
"Yeah she's gonna be my wife." Gerard said with a smile.
"She's beautiful Gee" Frank said with a smile.
Gerard turned to me as a slow song came on. "I wanna dance with my lady, so excuse me." Gerard said as he stood up with me.
He put his hand on my back then danced with me slowly as he hummed the song.
I hummed it with him and held his hand.
At the end of the song he kissed my lips.
I looked up at him and smiled.
"You make this night amazing...."
"Aw Gerard..." I said and blushed.
He smiled then took me back to the table.
All of a sudden, I had the worst feeling ever. I wanted to puke. "Ohhh Gerard!"
"Hold on babe" Gerard didn't turn to me.
"GERARD OH MY GOD!"
"What baby girl?!" He turned and gasped. "Oh God... It's time?!"
Gerard rushed me into the lobby and took off his tuxedo jacket then called 911.
"Gerard it hurts! Make it stop! Please!" I cried to him.
"Lindsey I can't!"

When the ambulance came, I was in so much pain. Gerard held my hand through it all. In the hospital room, the baby came out so quickly.
"It's a girl!"
"I knew it!" Gerard shouted in excitement. "My baby girl!"
As the doctor handed him the baby, he cried. He was so happy.
"I can't believe it.." Gerard said. "She looks just like her beautiful mommy."