& Sometimes Life Isn't Fair but I Will Always Love You

We start on the path again, back to his car, when he grabs my hand and intertwines my fingers with his. Tired, I lay my head on his shoulder, and he kisses my forehead.

We get back to the car and faster than I would have liked we were back, parked on the street in front of my house.

I turn to him.

“See you soon?” I ask him.

“Is tomorrow soon enough?” he asks, moving his head centimeters away from mine.

“Not even close.” I say, feeling his breath on my lips.

I grab his neck with one hand as he grabs the back of my jaw with his, and we pull each other in for one last kiss before the nights over.

And when we pulled away, and he looked me in the eye and said goodbye, I knew that hidden meaning in his eyes. The underlying message, the unsaid words. The silent ‘I love you’, and whether that was my imagination or not, I knew one thing. I was definitely falling in love with Brandon Tarak, and there was nothing I could do about it.
***
Mashed potatoes are delicious!

Those were my thoughts as I was eating dinner that night with my family. I was just sitting there eating my dinner sitting across from my mom, and next to my dad and little brother Tyson. Tyson is my favorite person in the world. I know that most girls hate their little brothers, but I love mine. He is the funniest and cutest and most random four year old I know, and he’s starting pre-school already!

I got torn away from my thoughts when I heard my mom start a new conversation.

“Today I met this nice woman in the line at the organic grocery store,” my mom said, “we were stuck in the line for nearly twenty minutes, and we were only in the self checkout!” my mom went on to explain that it took so long because therer was a woman in front of them who had about a hundred coupons.

“Mom would you stop babblin?” Tyson asked.

I snorted, that’s why I love this kid. He’s so smart for his age, but he’s not like a geek, he’s just intelligent. He can understand a conversation, he’s definitely going to be a charmer.

“Oh eat your vegetables.” My mom said, laughing, thinking it was a good comeback.

Tyson just looked at me out of the corner of his eye, and we laughed silently.

“Anyway,” my mom said, looking pointedly at Ty, “we got to talking, and she told me that her son has Acute Promyeolytic Leukemia.” She said sadly.

My heart beat really fast, and I don’t know why. I think it was because I was a very sympathetic person. I cared about others more than I care about myself.

“And, it just got me thinking,” my mom went on, her voice starting to choke up, “that I am very lucky to have two healthy, wonderful children.” She said, and then put her hand over her mouth when she started to cry.

I just shook my head laughing to myself, while Tyson looked at my mom like she was stupid.

“Mom, would you stop crying?” he asked her.

I laughed out loud at that one.

“Alright, that’s enough guys, stop making fun of your mother.” My dad said, with a sly grin on his face.

“Dad, are you going over to the dark side?” I asked, faking disbelief.

“No!!!!!” Tyson said, putting his head in his hands and shaking his head.

We all took the whole dinner as a big joke, but what my mom had said really stuck with me.

So that night, after I was showered and my hair was braided, I drew back my thick comforter and before I got in bed, I got on my knees and put my elbows on the bed, and my head on my hands.

And I prayed.

I don’t pray often, but when I do, its always about something important.

“Dear God, please protect the boy with APL, protect him and his family, and let him live his full life. Please protect everyone who has cancer, and please help us find the cure. Amen.” It might’ve been a lame prayer, but it was what I had wanted to say.

With that I stood up, looked at myself at my full length mirror across the room. I thanked God that I was healthy and safe.

Then I got in my bed, turned off my lamp, and laid down. Within minutes I was asleep.