Another Memory

Gerard’s P.O.V.:

I couldn’t believe that I’d taken Alison to the prom. It still felt like a dream as we lay beside one another listening to the pipes in the walls and other, more disturbing noises coming from the rooms beside ours. She turned again and I could tell that even after we’d had a little laugh about it, it made her uncomfortable. It was making me uncomfortable, though in a very different way. I turned to face away from her and started thinking of dead kittens and granny underwear – anything to keep me calm. Although I knew where I stood with Alison and how we’d decided not to pursue a relationship, for reasons I could no longer understand, it wouldn’t stop me from wanting her.

“Gerard, I can’t sleep.”

“Same,” I whispered back. “Try counting to one hundred.”

“Is that what you’re doing?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

“I want my own bed.”

“Then why did you agree to come with us all afterwards? You could have gone home.”

“I dunno.” I knew why I came. I was hoping it’d be one of those nights where everything happened as I dreamt it would. I was hoping I’d find the courage to kiss her at the prom, then to woo her, for lack of a better word. And that didn’t have to mean we’d have to have sex or anything, no. Just, I wanted to have my arms around her or something, at the very least.

“What are you thinking about, Gerard?”

“Just a lot of things. What about you?”

“Umm…”

“Alison…”

“What?”

“You shouldn't hold things in.”

“It's not that.”

“Ohh.”

“I was just thinking of what prom is supposed to be, you know?” My prom hadn't really gone to plan. I got beat up in the car park after and Carla had to leave early because she had a curfew. I woke up in the bathroom of a house I didn't recognise, with a girl I'd never seen before. Though apparently, I passed out before anything happened.

“And how's that?” I asked. I didn’t think anyone’s prom went to plan.

“Well as a girl, you're supposed to get picked up by your date, and your parents are supposed to disapprove of them.” I still couldn’t believe the attitude of Alison’s mother. “Then the punch is supposed to get spiked and you're supposed to leave completely wasted, only to spend the night at some stranger's place getting even more drunk. Then you have sex with your date, or whoever. That kind of toe-curling, mind-numbing sex, you know? With the scratching and biting and licking and –”

She just went on. All the while I had to fight the urge to turn around and pin her to the mattress. “– pulling your hair before leaving bruises across your hips as he –” And she had me. I turned and found her wrists in the dark, pinning them just above her head. There was no time for protest, no time for explanations as my lips found hers as fast as they could, needing so desperately to feel that release of the built up lust within. It seemed the moment had a hold on us both as Alison brought her legs up to wrap around my waist, her hands struggling against my own to be freed. I granted her that as I ran my own hands down her sides, bringing her top up as they rested by her face once more, the feeling of flesh on flesh the only one I wanted at that moment. I pulled away and knew from that look in her eye that she wanted it, that she wanted me. I'd not had that kind of satisfaction in a long time, and it only made the situation more heated as clothing very quickly became an annoyance for the both of us. I'd already lost my shirt before I could think to take it off, and so rid Alison of hers instead, my eyes wandering to her breasts in full view with the little light we had. She was absolutely beautiful. I found myself blushing as I'd been staring too long, my lips then finding her neck, her collar, her chest, her hips... the elastic of her shorts and underwear. I bit down on the fabric and teased, then down onto her skin. I probably hurt her, but she didn't seem to care. And in but a moment we were both naked, with me rummaging through my bag for my wallet, that one emergency rubber calling my name louder than ever before. Mind you, it was hard to concentrate with lips trailing down your stomach towards dangerous territory. I couldn't breathe, and it seemed neither could she, as she teased and played with me.

The moment didn’t last long enough, with both of us laying on our backs, myself on the floor, with a light sheen of sweat covering our exposed skin. There were no words said as we caught our breath in the dark, crawling back beneath the covers to lay as we had been before. It was very quiet all of a sudden, save for the pipes in the walls, and I felt I had to say something. Hell, anything would suffice.

“Uhh. –” A lump was forming in my throat as I tried to find the right words for it. “You’re fucking beautiful, Alison.”

“You don’t have to say anything Gerard.” And so, we were silent for a few moments more. “But you’re fucking beautiful, too.”