It's a Good Year for a ***

We split up between the two rooms. Matt and Bryan roomed with me and Ana, while Jimmy and Johnny got the second room to themselves. I place Ana on the bed farthest from the door. She looks so scared, but so amazingly beautiful at the same time. I smile. I’m going make her mine. All mine. Matt takes the extra blankets from the car and lays out a pallet for himself on the floor, blocking the door. I give him a nod and look at Bryan who has already kicked off his shoes and is crawling under the covers. I strip off my shirt take off my boots.

“Take off the hoodie.” I tell Ana as I pull the blankets down.
She shakes her head no and backs up till she is off the bed and standing in the corner. Tears start to roll down her face and she starts to sob. I hate it when girls cry, it makes me angry. I clench my fists and step towards her. She starts to cry harder and gets louder as I stand in front of her. I reach out and touch her face, resulting in her letting out a scream. My hand quickly finds its way to her throat, squeezing until her scream is muffled. Her hands franticly grab at mine and her eyes plead for me to let go.

I take my hand away from her neck and brush it threw her hair. Tangling my fingers in it and pulling hard.
“Now take of the fucking hoodie and get in the bed.” I say slowly as I press my face next to her ear. I kiss her neck and back away from her. She pulls the hoodie over her head and holds in front of her body, touching her neck gently. I get in the bed and pull her into me, laying on my side with her back pressed against my chest. She’s shaking like a leaf so I pull the covers over us and cuddle against her. I can hear her quiet sobs as I nestle my face into the back of her neck.

“I’m so sorry baby. I didn’t want to hurt you like that, but you just wouldn’t listen like a good girl. Shh. Close your eyes little girl.” I whisper to her. This felt so right, her here with me, asleep in my arms. I dreamed of me and her, she was happy and smiling. How I longed to see her smile.
I instinctively reached out for her and open my eyes when I don’t feel her beside me. I sit upright, all the grogginess vanishes. I look around the room. Matt is still asleep in front of the door and Bryan is snoring, passed out still. The bathroom light is on and the door closed. She has to be in there. I open the door and am immediately throw into a fit of rage. She is sitting in the bathtub with a piece of broken glass in her hand. A small line of blood is forming where she had cut her arm. I react so quickly I scare even myself. I grab her arm, tossing the glass away from us. She lets out a scream and I cover her mouth with my hand, smothering the sound. She throws her fists at me and I slam her back into the wall so hard she loses her breath. I roughly grab her arms and drag her out of the bathroom, laying her out flat on the floor. I straddle her and grab her neck.

“Shut up!” I scream as I punch her face, hard. Her head smacks the ground and for a moment I think she is unconscious. Her fists fly up and hit me in the face without warning. I growl as I unleash all the frustration from this trip. I repeatedly hit her and scream things at her. I feel a pair of arms grab my shoulders and pull me back. I fall back and look up to see Matt standing over me and Bryan standing beside me. Matt reaches down and checks her pulse. Oh God. I’ve killed her. I collapse on the floor next to her and sob loudly.
“Oh god. I’m sorry baby. Look what you made me do. Oh god. I’m sorry.” Tears fall from my eyes and my breathing speeds up. I rock back and forth on the floor, holding her limp body to me.
“Zachy.” Matt says calmly, pulling Ana from my arms. “We need to clean her up. Help me get her into the bathtub.”

I stand up and cradle her head in my hands while they grab her legs and body. We place her in the bath and run cold water over her face. All the damage I have done becomes visible as the blood runs off her face.
“Oh God.” I repeat over and over again. Look what I did to her. Her eyes were swollen shut and there were various cuts on her face from me hitting her so hard. Why did I do that? Why couldn’t she just be good? I brush my fingers through her wet hair and rock back and forth.
“Zachy, this was an accident. You didn’t mean it.” Bryan says patting me on the back.
“Look what I did to her!” I scream, punching the wall next to me.
“Go get Jimmy.” Matt spoke, looking at Bryan. He left without another word.
“Take her clothes off V.”
“What? Why?” I ask looking at him
“She’ll get sick if we leave her in these wet clothes. Go get her something to wear.”

I leave her side hesitantly and go to my bag. I grab a pair of basketball shorts and one of my shirts. When I walk back in the bathroom Matt has he laying on the floor.
“Dry her off and put those on her. Then put her back into bed.” He says calmly, handing me a towel. I sit down next to her and lift her shirt over her head. She was tiny. I wrap the towel around her and scrub her arms and stomach till I’m sure she is dry. I unbutton her pants and slide them off, throwing the wet clothes into the tub. I dry her off quickly, careful not to hurt her anymore. She was beautiful, no, gorgeous. She was perfect. Her body was the most amazing thing I had ever seen. I place my fingers on her chin and trace little circles on her skin as I move my hand down to her stomach and her legs. I pull the shirt over her head and slip the shorts on her. I put her back into the bed and crawl in next to her, pulling her so she is lying on my chest.
“I’m sorry.” I whisper over and over again until I drift off to sleep.