Destined to Explode

“Guess who’s going to be joining you for Thanksgiving, Jackalope?!” I screech down the phone, flailing about in my apartment, 3 states over from my favourite cousin, thanking the heavens that people couldn’t see me right now.

“No way! Poppy, I thought you always went to Dickhe- I mean Rick’s for Thanksgiving?!”

I laugh at the clear insult to my now ex-boyfriend, “That boy out stayed his welcome, my dear. This year, I can finally make the road trip down to see you and Joyce.”

“I knew you only loved me for my Mom, Poppy. That hurts. Deep, deep in my heart.”

“I thought we’d talked about this Jack, you have no heart, just a lump of coal.” I laugh at the hurt whimper I receive in reply, “Now, I’m gonna hang up, cos I gotta go pack up my shit so I can come see your fat ass.”

“See you, Poppy. Miss ya and love ya.”

“I love you too, faggot.”

I can’t help but laugh as I think over another one of mine and Jack’s phone conversations. No matter where he was, or where I was, or what we were doing, we never failed to insult each other at least three times in a conversation, even if the company we had didn’t approve.
Now, here I was, about five minutes away from the Barakat residence, fidgeting in my seat as my brain thinks back to all the immensely fun times I’d spent in Maryland with Jack and his obviously mental friends (I mean, they did after all, associate with Jack out of choice).

“Hey you guys!” I holler as I slam the trunk of my car shut, waiting with my hand on my hip as Jack bounces out of the house, followed by May, who instead calmly walks the steps from the front door, smirking at me as I’m almost tackled by Jack and his constant hyper-ness.

“Heeey Poppy!” He grins at me, “Missed you, slut.”

“You too, Bassam. You too.”

May engulfs me in a slightly calmer hug, although we do end up bouncing up and down at the fact I mentioned ‘presents’ and ‘clothes’.
Jack hears none of this though, as he’s talking a mile a minute while making the trip to take my luggage into the house, only joining us outside again so he can push us back inside.

“Alex and Zack and Rian are here. With Cass and Lisa. Fuck, it’s like when were sixteen.”

“Fuck those guys, I wanna go see Joyce.”

“Poppy...” Jack drags out, whining like a small child as he throws me the doe eyes, throwing his arms down at his side in a tantrum, “Can you please come see my friends first? Please? Pretty please?”

I glare at him as I stop in my path to the kitchen where I know my aunt will be slaving away at making the best thanksgiving meal, as always.

“Fine, five minutes. I can’t last without Joyce much longer.”

Alex almost spits his drink down Lisa as he hears the end of my sentence, laughing despite the disgusted look on his girlfriends face, “I knew I missed you for a reason, Poppy.

You share my love for Jack’s Mom!”

“Gaskank, Zachary, Brin. Cass, aka ‘I’ll ring you tomorrow, no worries’. Lisa.” I nod at each of them in turn and raise my eyebrows as they don’t move from their places on the sofas,

“Um, no hugs? No squeals of joy that I’m back? Nothing?”

“Pop-.”

“Save it! I’ll go see the only person in this house that loves me then. If you suddenly rediscovered your love for me, I’ll be in the kitchen.” I turn on my heel and take a small step forward, knowing I can hear them shuffling.

I hear the mumbled, ‘Where you belong’, from Zack before I’m attacked from behind, my old friends relaying their joke apologies and cries of adoration.

“We really do miss having you around though, Pops, really, really.” Alex grins as he’s the last to let go, “Serious business. No joke. Promise.”

I laugh, “It’s only because I’m the only one who can calm Barakat here down, so don’t lie.”

“That to.” Rian chuckles, “Now, how about you sit down and tell us the tales of Chicago?”

----

It’s nearly 1am when I trail off to bed, bidding Zack and Rian a goodnight as they begin to settle down in the basement of the house, where they were staying over this small holiday, seeing as the Barakat residence was this year’s official Thanksgiving party place, and their families would soon be joining us.

Alex sighs as he steps through the front door, hands rubbing his arms to get rid of the cold, and I smile softly at him as he notices my presence, “I thought you’d gone home for the night, Gaskarth?”

He shakes his head, “I prefer the festivities here. I just made sure Lisa got home OK, ya know?”

I nod, sitting on the first step of the stairs as he takes off his outdoor wear, “How’s life been treating you then, Lex?”

“As good as always, Pops. You know me, no complaints, really.”

‘No complaints, really.’

That last word, clearly, to me at least, meant that there was something bugging him and he sniffs as he realises that I’ve picked up on it.

“Something you wanna talk about, Gaskank?

He shrugs, “You’ve gotta me tired, driving from Illinois and all. I’ll talk to you in the morning, yeah?”

I laugh quietly at him, shaking my head as I stand up and walk back into the depths of the house, “I’ve known you too long for shit like that too work. Get your ass into the kitchen and we’ll have a gossip over some hot cocoa.”

----

“You know, you told me something back when I was fretting about not being able to juggle everything and everyone in my life, you remember?” I smile at him as he rubs his hands continuously through his hair, “You told me, ‘pretending to be someone you’re not takes a toll on the real you, and the real you is more important than anyone else’. I think, maybe that’s a little relevant now. I know you love Lisa, there’s no doubting that, but if she’s stopping you being the person you wanna be then, you either talk to her about it and see if she can compromise or think about if it would benefit your life if she wasn’t in it anymore.”

“How did we end up in the same social group as those dumb fucks, huh?” Alex sighs as he looks up from counter top, gesturing his head back to where we can hear Zack and Rian arguing about who knows what through the basement door, “Don’t know what I’d do without you and your general wise self.”

“Your brain would turn to mush.” I wink, “You could talk to Jack about this you know, or anybody else, they’d listen.”

“I know, but, it’s different. They don’t take things seriously like you. It takes tears for even Rian to realise something’s wrong.”

“In the future, just call me or something, you have my number, you have my email, god damn, you even have my address. If things start to blur, let me know, I can offer you clarity for a few hours, days, whatever.”

“It sounds like your offering me drugs, Poppy, but I get you. Thanks.” He stands up from the stool, stretching until his back cracks, giving me a sleepy smile, “You been confined to the basement as well, or?”

I follow his lead at the mention of bed, but shake my head, “I’m sharing with May, which probably means Jack too.”

“Well,” He laughs, stepping forward to wrap me in a tight hug, “Good luck with that, Jack has taking too purring in his sleep. Sleep well though, love.”

Bastard.